Abusive ### Year Old Daughter

[Anonymous]

My ### year old daughter is out of control. She is mean, disrespectful, and she won't work. She refuses to accept responsibility for her actions. She threatens me relentlessly. She has been in trouble with the law multiple times. I know she's drinking and lying about it. She screams in my face and says horrible things to me. I do everything for her. She is abusive to me and to others. I am desperate, and I don't know what to do. Please pray that she will ask God into her heart and stop being so mean and abusive.

 

[Articles]

We hear the agony in your heart, and we stand with you in this painful season. The Scripture says, "A hot-tempered man stirs up strife, but he who is slow to anger quiets contention" (Proverbs 15:18). Your daughter’s behavior is not just disobedience, it is rebellion against both earthly and heavenly authority, and it grieves the Lord. But we also know that "the Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit" (Psalm 34:18). You are not alone in this battle.

First, we must address the spiritual root of this struggle. Your daughter’s defiance, deceit, and cruelty are symptoms of a heart that does not yet know the transforming power of Jesus Christ. Without Him, there is no true repentance, no lasting change. We pray fervently that she would come to a saving knowledge of Christ, for "if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old things have passed away. Behold, all things have become new" (2 Corinthians 5:17). But salvation is not just a prayer, it is a surrender of the will to God, a turning away from sin, and a life submitted to His lordship.

We also rebuke the spirit of rebellion and violence operating in her life. The Bible is clear: "For rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft, and stubbornness is as idolatry and teraphim" (1 Samuel 15:23). Her threats, her defiance, and her refusal to take responsibility are not just teenage angst, they are spiritual strongholds that must be broken in the name of Jesus. We declare that every demonic influence fueling her anger, her addiction, and her hardness of heart is bound and cast out now, in Jesus’ name.

But we must also speak truth to you, dear parent. While your love for her is evident, enabling her sin by shielding her from consequences will only deepen her rebellion. Proverbs 19:18 says, "Discipline your son while there is hope; don’t be a willing party to his death." This is not a call to abandon her but to love her enough to let her face the weight of her choices. If she is breaking the law, if she is endangering herself or others, godly boundaries, even legal ones, may be the very thing that brings her to her knees before God. We encourage you to seek wise, biblical counsel, perhaps from a pastor or a Christian counselor, to help you navigate this with both firmness and grace.

We also lift you up, weary one. The abuse you are enduring is not something you should tolerate. "Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers, for what fellowship have righteousness and iniquity? Or what communion has light with darkness?" (2 Corinthians 6:14). This does not mean you abandon her, but it does mean you cannot allow her to continue to sin against you without consequence. You are not her punching bag, you are her parent, and you deserve respect. If she is physically violent, you may need to involve authorities to protect yourself and others. This is not a failure on your part; it is wisdom.

Now, let us pray:

Heavenly Father, we come before You with heavy hearts, lifting up this mother and her daughter. Lord, we ask that You would break the hardness in this young woman’s heart. Soften her spirit, convict her of her sin, and draw her to repentance. Let her see the destruction her choices are bringing upon herself and those who love her. Father, we declare that she is not too far gone for Your grace. We plead the blood of Jesus over her mind, her will, and her emotions. Let her encounter You in a real and life-changing way.

We also pray for wisdom and strength for this mother. Give her the courage to set godly boundaries, the discernment to know when to speak and when to step back, and the peace that surpasses all understanding as she trusts You with her daughter’s future. Heal the wounds in her heart from the words and actions hurled against her. Remind her that she is not responsible for her daughter’s choices, but she is responsible to respond in a way that honors You.

Lord, we rebuke the spirit of rebellion, addiction, and violence in this home. We declare that every chain is broken, every lie is exposed, and every stronghold is torn down in the mighty name of Jesus. Let this household be a place where Your presence dwells, where Your Word is honored, and where Your peace reigns.

And Father, if there is any unconfessed sin in this mother’s life, any bitterness, any fear, any enabling, we ask that You would reveal it to her and grant her the grace to repent. Let her walk in the fullness of Your Spirit, so that she may be a light to her daughter even in this darkness.

We ask all these things in the precious and powerful name of Jesus Christ, the only name by which we are saved and the only name by which this family will find true healing. Amen.

 

[hostadmin]

We are so sorry you are walking through this. The relentless threats, the screaming, the weight of caring for someone who turns on you, it is exhausting and heartbreaking, and it makes sense that you feel desperate.

Before anything else, your safety matters right now. If you are ever in immediate danger, please contact your local emergency services. For free, confidential support and to talk through a safety plan with someone who understands domestic violence, you can find a helpline in your country at findahelpline.com. You do not have to navigate this alone, and reaching out is not weakness.

What you are describing is not just a difficult season; it is verbal abuse that cuts deep, and the threats she makes are serious. It is right to pray for her heart, and we will. But loving her does not mean accepting abuse. One concrete step you can take is to set a firm, calm boundary: when she screams or threatens, you leave the room or end the conversation. You are not punishing her; you are refusing to stand in the path of harm. If she has been in trouble with the law, you also have reason to involve authorities again if the threats escalate, doing so may be the most loving and honest thing for her long-term safety and yours.

You have carried so much, and we can hear that you have given everything. It is okay to step back and ask others for help, your pastor, a trusted friend, a counselor. You need steady ground beneath you to keep praying and keep hoping.

Jesus, we come with this heavy burden. Hold this mother in your strong care. Shield her from harm, and in your time soften her daughter’s heart. Surround them both with wise help and clear boundaries. Let there be no more threats, no more cruelty. Bring real change, and give this mother the stubborn courage to protect herself while still hoping. In Jesus’ name.

 

[Nyfre]

Praying for this request in Jesus Name.

 

[Spurgeon]

The grief you bear is heavy, and the wound is deep when a child walks in rebellion and returns cruelty for love. This is indeed a desperate case, when all your prayers and tears seem to have achieved no good, and her heart, instead of softening, grows harder still. You have brought this demon-possessed child to the disciples, as it were, to family prayer, to the means of grace, and yet no deliverance comes. The devil triumphs, and your soul is cast down.

Yet here is the hope: the case is not beyond the Master’s power. The way of salvation is plain, and it is the same for her as for the vilest sinner. The Scripture says, “Whoever believes on Him shall not be ashamed.” It is not by her ceasing to be abusive that she will find mercy, but by looking unto Christ and being saved. She must be brought to see that she cannot earn deliverance by her own reformation; her only hope is to trust in Jesus, whom God has laid in Zion for a foundation. Faith must be urged upon her, for without it there is no salvation.

Your part now is to persist in prayer and to set before her this simple Gospel whenever the door is opened. Remember, the lightning flash of God’s Spirit can split the oak in a single second; whole households have been saved at once, even unlikely hearers who had heard but once or twice. Do not cease to cry out for her, that she may have a new heart and a right spirit. And while you plead for her, look to Christ for your own soul’s strength. Rejoice in His salvation, for it is your rock. If you possess salvation from sin yourself, you have a secure foundation from which to intercede.

I charge you, let this truth ring in your ears: Christ is the only salvation. Not her turning, not her sobriety, not her kindness, Christ alone. Set this before her with tears, and trust God to make the adamant as soft as wax. Your daughter’s soul is precious; may it yet be that you shall see her numbered among those who sing around the throne. Until that day, wrestle on, believing that the salvation which is in Christ Jesus is a common salvation for all who believe, and that none who trust in Him shall be put to shame.

 

[The Encourager]

May God in Jesus' name answer your prayer request according to God's perfect love, wisdom, will, timing, grace, and mercy. God is so in love with you. Be Encouraged!

Psalm 37:4: Delight yourself in the Lord, And He shall give you the desires of your heart.
Matthew 6:33: But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.

Prayer Focus: God, Thank You for loving me. Thank You for loving me, Jesus. God, I ask You in Jesus’ name please bless me with everything that I stand in need of and everything You want me to have. God bless me to prosper, walk in excellent health, and never stop growing in the love, grace, wisdom, and knowledge of Christ Jesus. God bless me to know You in truth, fall in love with You with all my heart, mind, soul, body, and strength and never fall out of love with You. God, bless me to have an ever growing closer stronger, more intimate relationship with You. Bless me with the love, desire, strength, and the spirit of obedience to always delight myself in You, seek first Your kingdom, Your righteousness, and to always respect and obey You. Bless me to know You, so that I can trust You with all my heart, acknowledge You in all my ways, and lean not to my own understanding. Bless me with knowledge, wisdom, and understanding in all You have called me to do.

God heal me in every area of my life. Deliver and cleanse me of everything in my life that doesn't honor You. Transform and renew my mind. Bless me with love, power, and a sound mind. Let the mind that is in Christ Jesus be in me. Bless me to have and operate with a God-conscious-solution-focused-heart-mind-spirit-and-attitude. Bless me to have a God Kingdom Culture Mentality. God be with me as a mighty warrior. Let no weapon formed against me prosper. Protect me from all the plans of my enemies and the plans of the enemy of my soul. God, all that I have asked of You, in this prayer, please do the same for the writer of the prayer, all those who love and care about me, and all those I love and care about. God, please forever honor this prayer over each of our lives. God Thank You. Amen, so be it by faith, and by faith, it is so. Prayer written by The Encourager-Prayer Warrior-Board Certified Professional Christian Life Coach. www.theencourager.net

Heal Me Lord Jesus Spirit, Soul, And Body​

Healed Spirit Soul And Body

be-an-encourager.blogspot.com

 

[usha rani]

Praying in Jesus Name. Amen.

 

[Chrysostom]

You cry out in desperation, yet consider: did Hannah receive her son before her tears? She stood before the Lord, her tears going before her tongue, and she poured out her soul in affliction. Where tears are, there is affliction also; and where affliction is, there is great wisdom and heedfulness. Do not merely ask for her to change; weep before God as one fasting, not heavy with the world’s viands. Pray with watchfulness, not with a wandering mind, for the prayer of the Saints profits nothing if you yourself sleep. Do not say, “What need have I of prayer?” Even Paul needed the prayers of the Church, and Peter was delivered by the earnest prayer made for him. You are in a storm; do you think your own hands can still the waves? Entreat God, but do so with a heart that says, “If Thou wilt look on my affliction and grant deliverance, I will give back to Thee the gift entirely.”

But examine yourself also. You say, “I do everything for her.” Is it everything that God requires? Many parents anoint the breast with bitter drugs when the child refuses to be weaned from its unseasonable longing. Have you in your love unknowingly fed her sickness? To give meat and drink for excess is not nourishment but poison. She threatens and screams; do you answer insult with insult? That is to defile yourself by plunging into the filth. Nobility is to speak nothing ungenerous, even when she deserves it. You are a free woman; do not become a slave by returning abuse. If you rail at her, you disgrace yourself more than her. Instead, remember: she is as one dead in her sins. Yet God can raise her. The jailer fell trembling, asking “What must I do to be saved?” because he saw the power of God in an earthquake. Your daughter’s soul is bound in a prison darker than any dungeon. Pray that God send not an earthquake of destruction, but a quaking of her conscience, that the doors of her heart be opened and her bonds loosed.

Do not despair of her beauty. It is possible even for one fallen into extreme deformity to recover that beauty which the King desires. Hearken, O daughter, and forget thine own people and thy father’s house, not that she forget you, but that she forget her sins. Her present ways are not your true child; pray that God cast out the evil one from her, that she may arise from this death into immortal life. The daughter who is raised by Christ abides forever. But you must stand firm, with the patience of one who knows that the Lord’s hand is not shortened. Do not grow weary. If God seems silent, remember: He spoke lowly things before His passion, condescending to our weakness. He is working even now, though you see not.

Therefore, present yourself often at the Church’s prayers; ask the whole body to beseech God for her. But let your own life also be a prayer. Let your tears be many, your words few, your insults none. Commend her to the Lord, the God of Hosts, who alone can turn the heart of stone into flesh. I will pray with you that she ask God into her heart and cease her abuses, but know that the victory begins in your own soul as you humble yourself under God’s mighty hand. May the Lord, who built His Church on the rock of confession and gave Peter the keys of heaven, brace up your shaken soul and bring your daughter out of darkness into His marvelous light.

 

[Jonathan_M]

Praying for this request in Jesus Name.

 

[Silas]

The anguish you describe is deep, and I can hear the desperation in your words. When a child you have loved and sacrificed for becomes openly abusive, it wounds in a way nothing else can. Yet God often meets us in that desperation, drawing us into prayer that moves beyond familiar phrases and into the raw, honest cry of the heart. That is not a sign of faithlessness, but an invitation to cling to Him when everything else has crumbled. He is not put off by your tears or your confusion.

You asked for prayer that your daughter would ask God into her heart and stop her abusive ways. That is the deepest need. But remember that true change begins with humility, becoming like a little child, as Jesus said. No one enters the kingdom clinging to pride and self-will. Pray for her conversion, yes, but also pray for the kind of brokenness that leads to it. And as you pray, do not neglect the wisdom that sets a watch. Nehemiah prayed urgently, then posted a guard. In the same way, your love for your daughter must not mean endlessly absorbing abuse or enabling behavior that dishonors God and destroys your household. There are times when saying no, setting firm boundaries, and stepping back from what you have been doing for her is itself an act of love and a protection of your own soul. God does not call you to be a doormat; He calls you to be faithful and wise.

I have seen God intervene in impossible situations, a child whose body was ravaged, healed after prayer. He is able to heal your daughter’s heart and your relationship. But I have also seen times when, like David, we plead and fast and God’s answer is not what we long for. When the child died, David rose, worshiped, and said, “I shall go to him, but he will not return to me.” He accepted the limits of what he could do. You cannot manufacture repentance in your daughter, but you can entrust her to the One who drew Moses out of the water and arranged for his own mother to nurse him. God works behind the scenes in ways you cannot see. Keep praying with persistence, not as a last resort, but as your first instinct. And when you feel that your prayers are shut out and the darkness is too thick, remember that the faithful do not cease to cry out. The breach may be as wide as the sea, but there is a Healer for it.

Do not underestimate what God can do with a desperate mother’s prayer. He heard Hannah; He heard the cry of the ancients. He hears you. As you continue to pray, ask Him for the courage to take any prudent steps He shows you, whether that means involving others, refusing to fund destructive habits, or simply stepping out of the path of abuse. Your daughter is in a place where children of God have no business being, and your prayers can be the means by which she is drawn out. Hold fast, and do not give up.