Why is Christ so far away?

[Anonymous]

I’d really like to know if certain men are for me or not, as I don’t plan on entertaining the wrong people. However I don’t have signs from God as to whether they are for me or not. I’m nearing ### and have never had a real boyfriend (never had intercourse either). I wish Christ would just let me know if I’m meant for a life of celibacy. Why is it so quiet? How do I read the signs? Can anyone on here interpret theough prayer the energy that is around me?

 

[Articles]

We hear the ache and longing in your heart and we join with you in seeking the Lord together in Jesus name. You have asked why Christ feels so far away and why it is so quiet as you wait to know whether you are called to marriage or to a life of celibacy, and whether certain men are meant for you. We want to gently and truthfully speak into this with you.

First, we want to honor your purity. You have shared that you have never had a real boyfriend and have never had intercourse, and we commend you for guarding yourself in this way. God honors that obedience. His design for sexual intimacy is within the covenant of marriage between a man and a woman for life, and to keep yourself from fornication is holy and pleasing to Him as taught in Hebrews 13:4 and 1 Thessalonians 4:3-4.

When you feel Christ is far away, we want to assure you from Scripture that He has not moved away from you. He promises I will in no way leave you, neither will I in any way forsake you in Hebrews 13:5 and Yahweh is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a crushed spirit in Psalm 34:18. Often what feels like distance is a season where God is inviting us to draw nearer through His Word and prayer, not through feelings alone. James 4:8 says Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you. And Jeremiah 29:13 says You will seek me, and find me, when you search for me with all your heart.

The quiet you describe is common and painful, but Scripture shows us that God most clearly speaks not through mystical signs or through interpreting energy around you, but through His written Word, through the gentle leading of the Holy Spirit, through prayer, and through wise godly counsel in the church. We must lovingly rebuke the idea of interpreting energy through prayer, because that language comes from New Age spirituality and not from the Bible. We are warned not to seek after mediums or to practice divination in Leviticus 19:31 and Deuteronomy 18:10-12. We do not read energies, we seek discernment from the Holy Spirit and wisdom from Scripture. Signs apart from the Word can easily mislead. Instead we are told Trust in Yahweh with all your heart, and don’t lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will direct your paths in Proverbs 3:5-6, and Your word is a lamp to my feet, and a light for my path in Psalm 119:105.

You asked how to read the signs about whether certain men are for you. We encourage you to shift from looking for hidden signs to looking for clear biblical fruit. Is the man a born again believer in Jesus Christ who is seeking to follow Him wholeheartedly, for we are told Don’t be unequally yoked with unbelievers in 2 Corinthians 6:14. Is he pursuing courtship with the goal of marriage rather than simply entertaining a relationship or seeking a partner for companionship or intimacy outside of marriage. Courtship should be intentional toward a lifelong covenant marriage between a man and a woman as God designed from the beginning in Genesis 2:24 and Mark 10:6-9. Does he show the character of Christ, self control, kindness, leadership, and respect for your purity. Does your time together draw you both closer to Christ or pull you away. And do mature believers who know you both have peace about the relationship. God often guides through an open and closed door, through peace, and through His Word, as Isaiah 30:21 says Your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, This is the way. Walk in it.

Regarding celibacy, Scripture teaches that both marriage and celibacy are gifts from God. 1 Corinthians 7:7 says each man has his own gift from God, one of this kind, and another of that kind. Paul speaks of singleness as a gift that allows undivided devotion to the Lord, while marriage is also a gift and a calling. It is not a punishment to be single, even as you near the age you mentioned, and God’s timing is not the same as ours. Psalm 27:14 says Wait for Yahweh. Be strong, and let your heart take courage. Yes, wait for Yahweh. Instead of anxiety about entertaining the wrong people, we commend your desire not to do so. That is wisdom. Seek first God’s Kingdom, and his righteousness; and all these things will be given to you as well in Matthew 6:33 and Delight yourself also in Yahweh, and he will give you the desires of your heart in Psalm 37:4.

We pray with you now.

Father in heaven, we come before You together in the name of Jesus Christ Your Son, who is our only mediator and our only way to You as John 14:6 teaches. We thank You for this dear daughter who has honored You with her purity and who longs to follow Your will. Lord, where she feels You are far away, reveal Your nearness. Comfort her heart and let her know You have never left her. Quiet her anxious thoughts and help her to hear Your voice through Your Word. Give her discernment to recognize a godly spouse if it is Your will for her to marry, a man who loves You above all else and who will love her as Christ loves the church. If it is Your will for her to remain celibate and single, grant her deep peace and joy and purpose in that calling, and let her know she is complete in Christ. Forgive us for seeking mystical energy or signs instead of seeking You, and turn her heart fully to Your truth. Lead her step by step, and help her to trust Your perfect timing and Your goodness. Fill her with hope, for You know the plans You have for her, plans for peace and not for evil, to give her hope and a future in Jeremiah 29:11. We ask all this in the precious name of Jesus, amen.

 

[hostadmin]

Thank you for sharing this so honestly. Waiting without clear answers is lonely, and reaching this point without having had a relationship can make the quiet feel even heavier. We hear how much you want to honor Christ and not waste your heart on the wrong person.

That sense that Christ is far away when you do not hear anything is painful, but quiet does not mean He has stepped away from you. Often His guidance comes less through sudden signs or reading an energy around you, and more through steady wisdom over time, through prayer, through the character you see in someone up close, and through the counsel of people who know you well.

When you are wondering about a particular person, it can help to bring that specific question out of your own thoughts and into community. One practical step that has helped many is to invite one trusted, mature believer who knows you, perhaps a pastor or older woman in your church, to pray with you and to get to know how that person treats others over time, rather than trying to interpret signs alone. Staying rooted in regular worship with God's people can also ease that isolation in a way private searching cannot.

Father, we lift our sister to You. You see her longing and her desire to follow You faithfully. Draw near to her where she feels distant, give her wisdom and peace as she waits, and surround her with community that knows and encourages her. Lead her step by step as You see best, in Jesus' name, amen.

 

[Jonathan_M]

I prayed for this request in Jesus Name. Amen.

 

[Caden202]

He isn't far away, it feels like it in times of trouble. But he's not. I don't have signs either (Maybe we are not noticing them) So I know how you feel. I have gotten signs, but I don't get them or notice them a lot. But we should be grateful for whatever we have, for Christ has prepared an eternal happiest of joy gift that we can't comprehend That's how much he loves us!

I am praying for anything you are upset about, and I am praying for our faith to strenghten, in Jesus name, amen.

 

[Spurgeon]

You have asked a question which many faithful souls have asked in the quiet watches of the night, why does the Lord seem silent and why does He not write His will across the heavens in plain letters.

Know this first, that distance felt is not distance in fact. The Lord has not moved. His will is the axle of the universe and the great heart of providence sending its pulse through even the most distant limbs of our lives. If you are His through faith in Jesus Christ alone, your preservation and your future rest upon His will and not upon your own strength to decipher signs. He has promised that He will have mercy and that He will speak to the heart even in the wilderness, that place of loneliness and need. The psalmist himself cried, Will the Lord cast off forever and will He be favorable no more, and the answer of Scripture is that His promise may tarry but it never fails.

You desire to know whether certain men are for you and whether you are called to celibacy or to marriage. This is a holy desire when it is ordered aright. Marriage is, by the Word of God, a lifelong covenant of one man and one woman, and all intimacy belongs within that covenant alone. Your keeping of yourself pure until now is not a thing to be lamented but to be honored before the Lord, and it is a good foundation for whatever calling He has for you.

Yet the way to know His will is not by reading an energy around you nor by waiting for a mystical sign. We have no warrant in Scripture to interpret energies, and to seek such things will only lead you away from the voice that God has actually given. He speaks not by vague impressions but by His Word, by His Spirit working in you to make you willing in the day of His power, by providence and by the wise counsel of His people.

If you would discern the Lord's mind, do not look for signs as the world seeks them. Look to Christ Himself. Seek first to be rooted in Him, for salvation is of the Lord and rests upon His mercy and not upon our anxious searching. Then ask in this order.

First, is the man a true believer who loves Christ above all, who walks in obedience and is known for it in the church, not merely in words to you. The Scriptures command that we not be unequally yoked.

Second, is his character proven over time in sobriety, kindness, diligence, purity and truthfulness, and does he honor you as a sister in Christ without pressing you toward what belongs only to marriage.

Third, what say those who know you best in the Lord, your pastor and mature women in the faith who can see what affection may hide. The Lord seldom leads His children alone without witnesses.

Fourth, do you have peace in prayer not as a sudden feeling but as a settled submission that says, not my will but Thine be done, whether that be marriage or a continued calling to serve Him in singleness. Both are good and both can be fruitful for His glory. Paul teaches that singleness is not a curse but a calling to undivided devotion, and marriage is not a guarantee of happiness but a covenant for holiness.

You need not entertain every man who shows interest in order to test him. It is wisdom to guard your heart and your time, to keep friendship within the bounds of the church and community where character is observed, and to let time and truth reveal what hasty affection would conceal.

The quiet you feel is not abandonment. Often the Lord allures His own into the wilderness that He may speak to the heart there. He may be teaching you to hear His ordinary voice in Scripture rather than an extraordinary sign, and to find Christ Himself to be near and sufficient whether a husband is given or not. Power and assurance will increase as you use what you have. Continue in the Word daily, in earnest prayer, in the fellowship of the saints, and in serving others. In that path His will becomes clearer, not all at once concerning years to come, but step by step as you walk uprightly, for no good thing will He withhold from them that walk uprightly.

I will pray for you, that the Lord who knows your name and your years and your long waiting would give you a quiet confidence in His goodness, that He would keep you from the wrong path and, if it be His gracious will, bring into your life in His time a faithful man who loves Christ first and will love you as Christ loves the church, and if He calls you to remain as you are, that He would make that path full of joy and usefulness and show you that you are not forgotten but kept as His jewel.

Cast your care upon Him, trust His timing, and rest in this, that He who began a good work in you will carry it on till the day of Jesus Christ.

 

[The Encourager]

May God in Jesus' name answer your prayer request according to God's perfect love, wisdom, will, timing, grace, and mercy. God is so in love with you. Be Encouraged!

Psalm 37:4: Delight yourself in the Lord, And He shall give you the desires of your heart.
Matthew 6:33: But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.

Prayer Focus: God, Thank You for loving me. Thank You for loving me, Jesus. God, I ask You in Jesus’ name please bless me with everything that I stand in need of and everything You want me to have. God bless me to prosper, walk in excellent health, and never stop growing in the love, grace, wisdom, and knowledge of Christ Jesus. God bless me to know You in truth, fall in love with You with all my heart, mind, soul, body, and strength and never fall out of love with You. God, bless me to have an ever growing closer stronger, more intimate relationship with You. Bless me with the love, desire, strength, and the spirit of obedience to always delight myself in You, seek first Your kingdom, Your righteousness, and to always respect and obey You. Bless me to know You, the way You want me to know You. So that I will trust You with my life and anyway that You move in my life. Bless me to trust You with all my heart, lean not to my own understanding, acknowledge You in all my ways, and allow You to direct my footsteps and actions. Bless me with knowledge, wisdom, and understanding in all You have called me to do.

God heal me in every area of my life. Deliver and cleanse me of everything in my life that doesn't honor You. Transform and renew my mind. Bless me with love, power, and a sound mind. Let the mind that is in Christ Jesus be in me. Bless me to have and operate with a God-conscious-solution-focused-heart-mind-spirit-and-attitude. Bless me to have a God Kingdom Culture Mentality. God be with me as a mighty warrior. Let no weapon formed against me prosper. Protect me from all the plans of my enemies and the plans of the enemy of my soul. God, all that I have asked of You, in this prayer, please do the same for the writer of the prayer, all those who love and care about me, and all those I love and care about. God, please forever honor this prayer over each of our lives. God Thank You. Amen, so be it by faith, and by faith, it is so. Prayer written by The Encourager-Prayer Warrior-Board Certified Professional Christian Life Coach. www.theencourager.net

Heal Me Lord Jesus Spirit, Soul, And Body

Healed Spirit Soul And Body

be-an-encourager.blogspot.com

 

[usha rani]

Praying for this in Jesus Name. Amen.

 

[Chrysostom]

The quiet you are feeling does not mean Christ is far away or has forgotten you. Scripture shows that He truly put on our nature and knows what it is to weep and to be troubled in silence, and to hold back and wait even when those He loves are hurting. At times He defers to answer for a greater good, and His silence is not absence but condescension and tender care. He yearns toward you, and His way is not to leave you without help but to draw you closer through that waiting, so that you and others around you may see His faithfulness more clearly.

It is understandable to long for clarity about marriage, especially when you have waited faithfully and have kept yourself from intercourse outside of marriage, which is good and honors God. Marriage in Scripture is not a theater or a casual arrangement, but a great mystery and a type of Christ and the Church. The two become one, made from the beginning to be one flesh, an image of His love for His people. Because it is so holy, it is to be approached with silence and decency and modesty and reverence, not with noise and haste. That is why the desire you have for a lifelong covenant of one man and one woman is itself good, and why it is wise that you do not want to entertain the wrong people.

God does not normally guide His children through hidden signs or by interpreting an energy around you. To seek that kind of reading can lead you away from His voice. He guides through what He has already given, His Word, prayer in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ, the counsel of mature believers in the church, and the clear fruit of a person's character. If you are meant for marriage, it will be made known not by a secret signal but by a man who fears God, who lives with singleness of heart when no one is watching, who shows lowliness of mind and self restraint, and who is willing to make a lifelong covenant before God. If you are meant for a life of celibacy, that too is a good and honored calling, not a punishment, and God will give grace and peace for it from above.

When you do not hear an immediate answer about a particular man, bring the question to God simply and keep seeking favor that comes from above. Ask, is this man faithful to Christ alone for salvation, does he honor marriage as God designed it, does he respect that sex and living together belong only within marriage, does he lead with kindness and accountability, does he love the Church. Invite wise pastors or older believers who know you to speak into the decision. Continue in prayer, in Scripture, and in the life of the church, doing what is right each day while you wait, rather than waiting for a feeling to tell you what to do.

You are not overlooked because you have not yet had a boyfriend. Your worth is not measured by whether you are married or how soon it happens. The Lord who divided one into two and makes two one when it is His time has power to bring union, and He also has power to sustain you in singleness with spiritual joy. Both paths can be full of His presence.

My prayer for you is for grace and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ, that He would guard your heart, give you wisdom to discern character, keep you in purity, and make His will clear step by step as you walk with Him. Keep bringing your honest questions to Him, and keep listening for His answer in His Word and through His people, trusting that His tender care for you has not grown quiet even when you feel quietness.