J
jawlz77
Guest
Ever feel like you don't know which end is up? I've literally spent an hour trying to put something into words that would begin to address the complexities in my life right now that need prayer. Most recently, my marriage of five years has fallen apart due to a mental illness that seems to have taken every good thing out of my life over the past 15 years. After 5 months of separation, it's clear that my wife is much happier with the new freedom in her life and she is not looking to resume her relationship with me. I understand that I will never be able to give her physically or emotionally the things she needs. While she is patiently waiting for me to set her free, I'm having a hard time letting go knowing how God feels about divorce.
As I've struggled to deal with my own issues over the years, I've always found it therapeutic to help others over their hurdles. I've been a mentor to a fatherless teen in my neighborhood for the past 4 years. We hang out after school a few days a week and usually once on the weekend. While this is truly a relationship I feel that has been blessed by God, I'm concerned about it's continuance as the teen's mother has taken a more than friendly liking to me. While a supposed woman of God herself, she informs me daily that God has sent me into their lives as an answer to HER prayers for a man of God to serve as head of their family. I'm torn and tempted because I do see the potential there. However, I can't see God calling me out of one marriage and right into another. I also don't want to end what has really been a great mentorship between the teen and myself.
To further complicate things, since my separation, I've had a very difficult time making ends meet financially. While I once had a little money in the bank, I am now living paycheck to paycheck just to put a roof over my head and to put food in the fridge. I have 2 degrees and have sent out countless resumes and haven't gotten so much as a bite. I'm concerned, with the added expenses of heat over the winter months, I'm going to find myself in financial dire straits if something doesn't come along soon.
Please pray for me. I really could use some physical, emotional, and spiritual healing. Play that God will open the right doors and close the wrong ones. Pray the He will give me clarity and peace in my life choices. Pray that He will recognize my needs and give me the skills and tools necessary to meet them.
As I've struggled to deal with my own issues over the years, I've always found it therapeutic to help others over their hurdles. I've been a mentor to a fatherless teen in my neighborhood for the past 4 years. We hang out after school a few days a week and usually once on the weekend. While this is truly a relationship I feel that has been blessed by God, I'm concerned about it's continuance as the teen's mother has taken a more than friendly liking to me. While a supposed woman of God herself, she informs me daily that God has sent me into their lives as an answer to HER prayers for a man of God to serve as head of their family. I'm torn and tempted because I do see the potential there. However, I can't see God calling me out of one marriage and right into another. I also don't want to end what has really been a great mentorship between the teen and myself.
To further complicate things, since my separation, I've had a very difficult time making ends meet financially. While I once had a little money in the bank, I am now living paycheck to paycheck just to put a roof over my head and to put food in the fridge. I have 2 degrees and have sent out countless resumes and haven't gotten so much as a bite. I'm concerned, with the added expenses of heat over the winter months, I'm going to find myself in financial dire straits if something doesn't come along soon.
Please pray for me. I really could use some physical, emotional, and spiritual healing. Play that God will open the right doors and close the wrong ones. Pray the He will give me clarity and peace in my life choices. Pray that He will recognize my needs and give me the skills and tools necessary to meet them.
