treeoflife
Account Closed
Well, Lord Jesus - today I have every reason to be disheartened. I tried hard on stage today, - but clearly it didn't translate all the way I intended it to. I'm not sure anyone appreciated my time or my efforts - and more: I don't know if the audience enjoyed themselves at all.
To put it plainly - I'm pretty sure I sucked on stage.
Jesus Christ, I called on You, and call on You now - but Lord, now I have no job - despite calling on You and looking - now I have no money coming in - I'm relying on my fiance to help feed and clothe me.
This is not the way it should be. God, where ARE YOU? I've been calling on You, I've been praying, I've been asking, I've been knocking, I've been seeking - I've been offering, and giving, and believing - and You stay silent regarding me.
I can't do this anymore, just so You know. I'm reaching my breaking point as a human being on earth. So help me, God, - because I am starting to really need divine intervention. You promised me those things I would need - yet You deny me them - deny me the ability to earn them myself - because here my toil of decades is reduced down to 30 minutes on a stage, sucking right out loud - instead of the recordings I have tried to offer others - which are passable for quality I hope.
God, show me a sign - or stay silent forever regarding me - I would rather have no relationship with You than to be strung out and strung along and torn up - destroyed, hurt, ashamed, - all of these things and more: poisoned, and belittled, beaten, - and more - yet even Your promises regarding these persecutions, and the blessings: I have not found them.
I don't doubt Your power God, but right now in my life I am doubting You have any love for me. You love the whole world, I know, - but - I need Your attention Lord, - and You are ignoring me completely.
So make haste in reestablishing my place on the earth - because I breathe only to give You joy. I call on You because there is no other who can answer prayers, or make a man truly happy.
My joy is being sapped from me, Lord Jesus, and I have literally 73 cents in my account. I pray to be financially reestablished on earth. I can't live this way. Amen in Jesus Christ's name.
To put it plainly - I'm pretty sure I sucked on stage.
Jesus Christ, I called on You, and call on You now - but Lord, now I have no job - despite calling on You and looking - now I have no money coming in - I'm relying on my fiance to help feed and clothe me.
This is not the way it should be. God, where ARE YOU? I've been calling on You, I've been praying, I've been asking, I've been knocking, I've been seeking - I've been offering, and giving, and believing - and You stay silent regarding me.
I can't do this anymore, just so You know. I'm reaching my breaking point as a human being on earth. So help me, God, - because I am starting to really need divine intervention. You promised me those things I would need - yet You deny me them - deny me the ability to earn them myself - because here my toil of decades is reduced down to 30 minutes on a stage, sucking right out loud - instead of the recordings I have tried to offer others - which are passable for quality I hope.
God, show me a sign - or stay silent forever regarding me - I would rather have no relationship with You than to be strung out and strung along and torn up - destroyed, hurt, ashamed, - all of these things and more: poisoned, and belittled, beaten, - and more - yet even Your promises regarding these persecutions, and the blessings: I have not found them.
I don't doubt Your power God, but right now in my life I am doubting You have any love for me. You love the whole world, I know, - but - I need Your attention Lord, - and You are ignoring me completely.
So make haste in reestablishing my place on the earth - because I breathe only to give You joy. I call on You because there is no other who can answer prayers, or make a man truly happy.
My joy is being sapped from me, Lord Jesus, and I have literally 73 cents in my account. I pray to be financially reestablished on earth. I can't live this way. Amen in Jesus Christ's name.
