We hear the desperation in your cry, and we are moved with compassion for the deep spiritual battle you are facing. Your longing for salvation and your fear of dying unsaved reveal a heart that God is drawing to Himself—this is a work of the Holy Spirit, and we rejoice that you are seeking Jesus, even in the midst of such turmoil. The fact that you are wrestling with unbelief, anxiety, and the attacks of the enemy shows that you are on the brink of a breakthrough, for the devil would not fight so fiercely if your soul were not precious to God.
First, let us address the core of your struggle: salvation. You said, *"I tried to confess that Jesus is Lord but I just don’t truly, truly believe it. I believe it but don’t believe it."* This tension is more common than you might think. Even the father of the demon-possessed boy in Mark 9:24 cried out to Jesus, *"I believe! Help my unbelief!"* Faith is not about having perfect, unwavering certainty in your own strength—it is about turning to Jesus *in spite of* your doubts and asking Him to fill the gaps. Salvation is not earned by the *strength* of your faith, but by the *object* of your faith: Jesus Christ Himself. The Bible tells us in **Ephesians 2:8-9 (WEB)**, *"For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God, not of works, that no one would boast."* And in **Romans 10:9-10 (WEB)**, we read, *"...if you will confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For with the heart, one believes resulting in righteousness; and with the mouth confession is made resulting in salvation."*
You do not need to *muster up* enough faith on your own—you need only to come to Jesus as you are, broken and empty, and ask Him to give you the faith to believe. He is the author and perfecter of faith (**Hebrews 12:2**), and He will not turn you away. Your anxiety and inability to "surrender" are not barriers to His grace; they are the very reasons you *need* His grace. Jesus said in **Matthew 11:28 (WEB)**, *"Come to me, all you who labor and are heavily burdened, and I will give you rest."* He is calling you to Himself *right now*, not after you have it all together, but in the midst of your chaos.
The thoughts you are hearing—*"You need to surrender first"*—are partly true but twisted by the enemy to condemn you. Yes, surrender is necessary, but it is not something you do in your own strength. Surrender is simply ceasing to fight *against* God and instead letting Him fight *for* you. You cannot save yourself, and that is the point! **Titus 3:5 (WEB)** says, *"...not by works of righteousness which we did ourselves, but according to his mercy, he saved us through the washing of regeneration and renewing by the Holy Spirit."* Your part is to cry out to Him, as you are doing now, and trust that He will do the rest.
As for the anxiety and attacks you are experiencing, these are not from God. **2 Timothy 1:7 (WEB)** tells us, *"For God didn’t give us a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and self-control."* The devil is trying to steal your peace and your hope, but Jesus has already overcome him (**1 John 4:4**). You are not fighting this battle alone. The Lord is with you, and He is mightier than the one who torments you. **1 Peter 5:8-9 (WEB)** says, *"Be sober and self-controlled. Be watchful. Your adversary, the devil, walks around like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour. Withstand him steadfast in your faith, knowing that your brothers who are in the world are undergoing the same sufferings."*
Now, let us pray for you with urgency and authority in the name of Jesus Christ:
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Heavenly Father, we come before You on behalf of this precious soul who is crying out for salvation, for healing, and for deliverance from the torment of anxiety and unbelief. Lord, You see the depth of their despair, and You know the sincerity of their heart. You are the God who saves the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds (**Psalm 147:3**), and we ask that You would meet them right now in their moment of need.
Jesus, You said that whoever comes to You, You will in no wise cast out (**John 6:37**). This person is coming to You now, just as they are—full of fear, full of doubt, full of pain. Lord, grant them the gift of repentance and faith. Open their heart to receive You as their Lord and Savior. Let them experience the truth of **Romans 10:13 (WEB)**: *"For whoever will call on the name of the Lord will be saved."* Right now, in this moment, we ask that You would save them, Jesus. Wash them clean by Your blood, forgive their sins, and write their name in the Lamb’s Book of Life. Let them know, beyond any shadow of doubt, that they belong to You.
Father, we rebuke the spirit of anxiety, fear, and confusion that is attacking this person. These torments are not from You, and we command them to flee in the name of Jesus Christ. **2 Timothy 1:7** declares that You have given us a spirit of power, love, and a sound mind, and we claim that promise over this person now. Lord, fill them with Your peace that surpasses all understanding (**Philippians 4:7**). Calm their mind, still their heart, and let them rest in the assurance that You are holding them fast.
We also pray for their mental and physical well-being. Heal them, Lord, from the inside out. Restore their mind, renew their strength, and surround them with Your angels for protection (**Psalm 91:11**). Break every chain of the enemy that is trying to keep them bound. Let them walk in the freedom that Christ purchased for them on the cross.
Most of all, Father, we ask that You would seal their eternity with You. Let them know, without a doubt, that their destiny is in Heaven with Jesus Christ. Remove all fear of death and replace it with the hope of eternal life. Let them live each day in the joy of their salvation, growing closer to You and walking in Your will.
We thank You, Lord, for hearing our prayer. We trust that You are working in this person’s life, even now, and that You will bring them into the fullness of Your love and truth. In the mighty and holy name of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior, we pray. Amen.
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Finally, we want to encourage you: you are not lost to God. In fact, He is pursuing you right now. The very fact that you are seeking Him proves that He is drawing you to Himself (**John 6:44**). Do not be discouraged by the attacks of the enemy—they are a sign that your salvation is near. Keep crying out to Jesus. Keep reading His Word, even if it’s just one verse a day. Start with the Gospel of John, and let the truth of who Jesus is sink into your heart.
If you have not yet confessed Jesus as Lord with your mouth, do it now—out loud. There is power in speaking the truth. Say: *"Jesus, I believe You are the Son of God. I confess that I am a sinner, and I need Your forgiveness. I turn from my sin and trust in You alone for my salvation. Come into my life, Lord, and be my Savior. I surrender to You. Thank You for saving me."* If you pray this sincerely, He *will* save you. **1 John 5:11-12 (WEB)** says, *"The testimony is this: that God gave to us eternal life, and this life is in his Son. He who has the Son has the life. He who doesn’t have God’s Son doesn’t have the life."*
You are on the verge of the greatest miracle of all—being born again. Do not give up. Do not let the enemy convince you that you are too far gone. Jesus is reaching out His hand to you *right now*. Take hold of it, and never let go. We are standing with you in prayer, believing that God is going to do a mighty work in your life. Keep seeking Him, and you *will* find Him (**Jeremiah 29:13**). Your eternity with Jesus is secure the moment you place your trust in Him. Rest in that promise.
