The cry of your heart for the Spirit’s presence is the very cry I long to hear throughout the church. You desire not merely a gathering of kind people, but the fire of God, the joy of the Lord, and you are right, life with Jesus is more than kindness. That holy restlessness in your soul is no small thing. It may be the gentle stirring of the Spirit Himself, drawing you to depend wholly upon Him. You ask for Christ to be magnified, for the conversation to be Spirit-born and not flesh-born. Then go to that group pleading this one reality: without the Holy Spirit you utterly fail. He alone can take of the things of Christ and show them to you. He alone can convict, comfort, and build up the saints. How often do congregations meet and scarcely give a thought to whether the Holy Spirit is present! Yet without His breath, our words are dead, our prayers are cold, our fellowship is a mere form. Come, then, as one who comes empty, leaning not on good intentions or strong resolves, but upon the might of God the Holy Spirit alone.
You speak of the harsh topics as well as the easy. That is well, for the Holy Spirit is grieved when we shrink back from any truth that glorifies Christ. He is not a Spirit of compromise. He will never contradict His own Word, nor will He lead you to soften the hard sayings that exalt the Lord Jesus. When the Spirit fills the room, He does not grant a false peace; He gives boldness to speak what may wound the flesh in order to heal the soul. Yet remember, even in the most difficult themes, His work is always to glorify Jesus. If the conversation turns merely to controversy without Christ shining at the center, you may be grieving the Dove who would abide with you. The Spirit deals with the things of Christ. Let that be your test: does this word, this sharing, this moment magnify the Lord Jesus? Then you are on Holy Spirit ground.
That longing to stand before your congregation and testify of how God brings good out of evil, linking your own story to Joseph and to our blessed Redeemer, this may indeed be the nudge of the Spirit. He often speaks to His children in the quiet, urging “Today.” If He is prompting you, do not delay. But go in this posture: it is not your eloquence, nor your narrative alone, that moves hearts. Only when the Holy Spirit comes is there any life and force and power. Cry mightily that the Spirit Himself would anoint your lips and fall upon your hearers, even as upon Cornelius’ household, so that while you speak, Christ is formed in them. The Spirit works mysteriously, often through a simple, trembling testimony far more than through a polished sermon, for He delights to use weak vessels so that the excellency of the power may be seen to be of God and not of us.
As for baptism and matters of revelation, speak to your pastor freely. But let this be your guide: the Spirit seals us unto the day of redemption. He is the earnest of our inheritance, the inward witness that we are God’s. Do nothing that would grieve that tender Guest. Unbelief, unholiness, self-sufficiency, these vex Him. But when you walk in humble dependence, He delights to lead you into all truth. He will show you what you could never discover by fleshly wisdom.
You wish to see that fire in yourself, not merely in others. Then ask for a fresh receiving of the Holy Spirit. Not that He is absent from you if you are in Christ, but that there may be a renewed filling, a fresh anointing. Have you received the Holy Spirit since you believed? Is there not much divine power which has not yet been manifested in you? Live in Him, give yourself up fully to His indwelling, and you will not have to look far for the flame, He will be in you a well of water springing up unto everlasting life. When He comes, the inward frost dissolves, the love of Christ warms the heart, and the mouth speaks out of the abundance of that inner fire.
Go then to your gathering with this one petition: “Come, Holy Spirit. Come even now. We are nothing without Thee. Take of the things of Christ and show them to us. Let no word be spoken but what Thou dost indite. Let the whole room be filled with Thy presence, that Jesus alone may be glorious.” And remember, praying in the Holy Spirit does not require a certain form of words; it is the heart’s cry lifted up in His power. Yield yourself to His influence, and He will pray in you, speak through you, and build up His people. May the Lord grant that you do not grieve Him, but so honor Him that your group becomes a Holiest of holies, where Christ is everything and the Spirit’s power is manifestly present.
Prayer Focus: God, Thank You for loving me. Thank You for loving me, Jesus. God, I ask You in Jesus’ name please bless me with everything that I stand in need of and everything You want me to have. 
