We hear the deep anguish and spiritual conflict in your words, and we are grieved by the torment you are experiencing. First, we must address the troubling elements in your request with both truth and compassion, for the Word of God is a lamp to our feet and a light to our path. Let us begin by aligning your heart with Scripture, for there are several areas where your thoughts have strayed from biblical truth—some dangerously so.
You mention relying on God’s providence while expressing resentment toward those who urge you to work, even calling their advice the influence of demons. Yet Scripture is clear: *"If anyone doesn’t want to work, neither let him eat. For we hear of some who walk among you in rebellion, who don’t work at all, but are busybodies"* (2 Thessalonians 3:10-11, WEB). Work is not a curse but a calling from God, a means by which we provide for ourselves and others, glorify Him, and avoid idleness, which breeds sin. To reject work as a worldly distraction is to misapply Scripture. Even the apostle Paul, who devoted his life to ministry, worked as a tentmaker to support himself (Acts 18:3). Providence does not mean passivity—it means trusting God *while* we obey His commands, including the command to labor faithfully.
You also express regret over giving away all your money, and now you feel persecuted and shamed by others. While generosity is commendable (2 Corinthians 9:7), wisdom and stewardship are equally vital. *"A prudent man sees danger and hides, but the simple pass on and suffer for it"* (Proverbs 22:3, WEB). If your giving was impulsive or lacked discernment, it is not too late to seek God’s wisdom in managing what remains. Repent if necessary, ask Him for direction, and trust that He can restore what has been lost as you walk in obedience.
Most alarmingly, your words reveal a heart consumed by bitterness, violence, and even murderous intentions—thoughts that are utterly contrary to the Spirit of Christ. *"You have heard that it was said to the ancient ones, ‘You shall not murder;’ and ‘Whoever murders will be in danger of the judgment.’ But I tell you that everyone who is angry with his brother without a cause will be in danger of the judgment"* (Matthew 5:21-22, WEB). To entertain thoughts of killing others, even in secret, is to open the door to demonic influence. These are not merely "unrealistic thoughts"—they are sinful and destructive. *"Don’t let any corrupt speech proceed out of your mouth, but only what is good for building others up as the need may be, that it may give grace to those who hear"* (Ephesians 4:29, WEB). You must renounce these thoughts immediately, confess them as sin, and ask God to cleanse your heart. *"Create in me a clean heart, O God. Renew a right spirit within me"* (Psalm 51:10, WEB).
You also mention feeling "religiously oppressed" and unable to act on violent impulses. This is not oppression—it is the mercy of God restraining you from evil! *"The Lord is not slow concerning his promise, as some count slowness; but he is patient with us, not wishing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance"* (2 Peter 3:9, WEB). Thank God that He has not allowed you to carry out such darkness. Instead of resisting this restraint, surrender to His conviction and let Him transform your heart.
Lastly, you invoke the name of Jesus, which is the only name by which we are saved (Acts 4:12). Yet your words reveal a struggle to fully submit to His lordship. True reliance on Providence is not about demanding God bless your choices—it is about surrendering your will to His. *"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and don’t lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight"* (Proverbs 3:5-6, WEB).
Let us pray for you now:
Heavenly Father, we lift this beloved soul to You, knowing that You alone can heal the brokenness and bind up the wounds of their heart. Lord Jesus, You see the rage, the fear, and the despair that have taken root, and we ask You to uproot every lie, every bitter thought, and every violent intention. Wash this heart clean by Your blood, and fill it with Your peace that surpasses all understanding. Break the power of resentment and the temptation to harm others. Replace hatred with love, despair with hope, and confusion with Your wisdom.
Father, we rebuke the spirit of violence and murder that has sought to take hold. By the authority of Jesus Christ, we command these evil thoughts to flee and for the mind of Christ to reign instead. Holy Spirit, convict where there is sin, comfort where there is pain, and guide this person into all truth. Teach them to work with thankful hands, to give with wise generosity, and to trust You in every circumstance—not as an excuse for passivity, but as an act of faithful obedience.
Lord, surround them with godly counsel—people who will speak Your Word into their life and hold them accountable. If they have isolated themselves, lead them back into fellowship with believers who can strengthen and encourage them. Break the power of shame and the fear of man, and let them find their identity in You alone.
We declare that no weapon formed against them shall prosper (Isaiah 54:17). Protect them from the enemy’s schemes, and let them walk in the freedom Christ purchased on the cross. May they know that vengeance belongs to You, O Lord (Romans 12:19), and that Your justice is perfect. Replace their desire for retribution with a heart that forgives, as You have forgiven us.
In the mighty name of Jesus Christ, our Savior and Redeemer, we pray. Amen.
Now, dear one, we urge you: turn from these dark thoughts and fix your eyes on Jesus. Read His Word daily, especially the Gospels, to see His heart of love and mercy. Seek out a mature believer or pastor to walk with you through this season. If you are not already in a Bible-believing church, we strongly encourage you to find one where you can be discipled and held accountable. The path you are on is dangerous, but God’s grace is greater. Repent, believe, and let Him lead you into His light. You are not beyond His reach. *"Come to me, all you who labor and are heavily burdened, and I will give you rest"* (Matthew 11:28, WEB). He is waiting for you.
Prayer Focus: God, Thank You for loving me. God, I ask You in Jesus’ name please bless me with everything that I stand in need of and everything You want me to have. 
