We come before you now with heavy hearts, for we hear the deep anguish and despair in your words, and we are grieved by the suffering you are enduring. But we must speak the truth in love, for your words reveal a heart that is crying out in pain yet is being deceived by the enemy of your soul. The thoughts you are expressing are not from God, but from the father of lies, who seeks to steal, kill, and destroy (John 10:10). Suicide is not the will of God for your life—it is a permanent solution to temporary pain, and it contradicts the hope and purpose He has for you.
First, let us address something critical: you have invoked the name of Jesus in your prayer, and for that, we give thanks, for there is no other name under heaven by which we must be saved (Acts 4:12). Yet we must ask: do you truly know Jesus as your Lord and Savior? Have you surrendered your life to Him, trusting in His death and resurrection for the forgiveness of your sins? If not, we urge you to turn to Him now, for He alone can give you eternal life and the strength to endure this season. "If you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved" (Romans 10:9). Without Christ, there is no hope, but in Him, there is life abundant—even in the midst of suffering.
Now, let us rebuke the lies you are believing. You have said, "I am a loser," but Scripture declares that you are *fearfully and wonderfully made* (Psalm 139:14). You have been created in the image of God (Genesis 1:27), and your life has value and purpose, even if you cannot see it now. You have thanked Jesus for bullying, disrespect, financial loss, and humiliation, but these things are not from Him. Jesus said, "The thief only comes to steal, kill, and destroy; I came that they may have life, and may have it abundantly" (John 10:10). What you are experiencing is the work of the enemy, not the hand of God. Our Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit (Psalm 34:18). He does not delight in your suffering—He delights in your *deliverance*.
You have asked God to help you kill yourself, but this is a grave sin against His commandment: "You shall not murder" (Exodus 20:13). To take your own life is to reject God’s sovereignty over it. Your life is not your own—it belongs to Him (1 Corinthians 6:19-20). Suicide is not an escape; it is a tragedy that leaves behind unhealed wounds for those who love you and robs you of the future God intends to redeem. The pain you feel is real, but it is not the end of your story. Job, in his suffering, cried out, "Though he slay me, yet I will hope in him" (Job 13:15). Even in the darkest night, we must cling to God, not curse Him or seek to hasten our own end.
We also must address your bitterness toward God. You have thanked Him for your suffering as if He were the author of it, but this is not the heart of our Father. Yes, we live in a fallen world where pain exists, but God uses even the hardest trials to refine us, not to destroy us. "For our light affliction, which is for the moment, works for us more and more exceedingly an eternal weight of glory" (2 Corinthians 4:17). Your financial loss, your job, your humiliation—these are not evidence of God’s abandonment, but an invitation to trust Him more deeply. He is the God who parts the Red Sea, who feeds the hungry, who raises the dead. He is not finished with you yet.
As for the bullying and spiritual attacks you mention, we stand with you in rebuking these forces of darkness. "Submit therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you" (James 4:7). You are not powerless—you have the authority of Christ within you if you are His. Put on the whole armor of God (Ephesians 6:10-18), and stand firm. The humiliation you feel is not your identity in Christ. He was humiliated for *you*—beaten, mocked, and crucified—so that you might be lifted up with Him (Isaiah 53:3-5). Your maturity is not stalled; it is being forged in the fire, if you will let Him shape you.
Now, let us pray for you with the truth of God’s Word:
Heavenly Father, we lift up this precious soul to You, knowing that You see their pain and collect every tear in Your bottle (Psalm 56:8). Lord, we rebuke the spirit of suicide, depression, and despair that has taken hold of their mind and heart. These thoughts are not from You, and we command them to flee in the mighty name of Jesus Christ. Father, surround this person with Your angels, guard their mind with Your peace, and let them feel Your presence in a tangible way.
Lord, we ask that You would open their eyes to see that their life has purpose. You have plans for them—plans for welfare, not for evil, to give them a future and a hope (Jeremiah 29:11). Restore to them the joy of Your salvation (Psalm 51:12) and fill them with the hope that does not disappoint (Romans 5:5). If they have not yet surrendered to Christ, soften their heart now. Let them turn from their pain to the One who bore their sins on the cross.
Father, we pray for provision. You are Jehovah Jireh, the God who provides. Restore what has been lost, open doors no man can shut, and let them see Your faithfulness in the land of the living. Heal their broken heart and bind up their wounds (Psalm 147:3). Place godly people in their path—those who will speak life, offer help, and walk with them through this valley.
We declare that the weapons formed against them shall not prosper (Isaiah 54:17). Every tongue that rises against them in judgment, they shall condemn. Lord, let them rise from this place of despair, clothed in strength and dignity, knowing that their Redeemer lives (Job 19:25). Fill them with Your Spirit, Lord, and let them know that You are near to the brokenhearted.
Finally, Father, we ask that You would give them the courage to seek help—whether from a pastor, a counselor, or a trusted believer. You did not design us to walk alone. Let them reach out, even if it feels impossible. And Lord, if they are in immediate danger, send Your angels to intervene and keep them safe.
We pray all this in the powerful, holy, and matchless name of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior. Amen.
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To you who are reading this: *Please reach out for help today.* You are not alone, and your life matters deeply to God. If you are in the U.S., call or text the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline at 988. If you are outside the U.S., seek out a crisis hotline in your country. Talk to a pastor, a counselor, or a trusted believer. Let someone walk with you through this. And most importantly, turn to Jesus—not away from Him. He is the only One who can carry you when you cannot stand. "Cast your burden on Yahweh, and he will sustain you. He will never allow the righteous to be moved" (Psalm 55:22).
We love you, and more importantly, *God loves you*. He has not forgotten you. Cling to Him, even if it’s with the last shred of faith you have. He will not let you go.
Prayer Focus: God, Thank You for loving me. God, I ask You in Jesus’ name please bless me with everything that I stand in need of and everything You want me to have. 
