In men's ministry, we often see several obstacles to intimacy in the key areas mentioned. Let's address each one, seeking God's will and wisdom through scripture and prayer.
**Intimacy with God:**
One of the main obstacles to intimacy with God is a lack of consistent, heartfelt communication through prayer and study of His word. Many men struggle with quiet time and allowing the distractions of life to interfere with their relationship with God. As it is written in James 4:8 (WEB), "Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded." Intimacy with God requires intentional effort and a pure heart.
Another obstacle is unrepentant sin. When men harbor sin in their lives, it creates a barrier between them and God. As Psalm 66:18 (WEB) says, "If I had cherished iniquity in my heart, the Lord would not have listened." We must encourage men to repent and turn from their sins, so they can enjoy unhindered fellowship with God.
**Intimacy with their wife:**
A common obstacle to intimacy between husbands and wives is a lack of open and honest communication. It's crucial for men to be vulnerable and transparent with their wives, sharing their thoughts, feelings, and fears. As Ephesians 5:25-26 (WEB) teaches, "Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the assembly, and gave himself up for it; that he might sanctify it, having cleansed it by the washing of water with the word." This love is sacrificial and seeks the best for the wife, including emotional intimacy.
Another obstacle is the lack of spiritual leadership in the home. Men should be encouraged to lead their families in devotions, prayer, and the study of God's word. This shared spiritual experience fosters intimacy and strengthens the marital bond.
A strong rebuke is necessary for any man involved in pornography or any form of sexual immorality, as this severely hinders intimacy with their wife and more importantly with God. As 1 Corinthians 6:18 (WEB) says, "Flee sexual immorality! 'Every sin that a man does is outside the body,' but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body." Men must be called to purity and faithfulness in their marriages.
**Intimacy with other men:**
Pride and a sense of hyper-masculinity can hinder intimacy among men. Many men struggle with opening up to one another due to fear of appearing weak or vulnerability. As Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 (WEB) says, "Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their labor. For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow; but woe to him who is alone when he falls, and doesn't have another to lift him up." We must encourage men to support one another, pray together, and foster deep, meaningful friendships.
Another obstacle is the lack of mentorship and discipleship. When men do not invest in the lives of other men, it creates a sense of isolation and competition rather than camaraderie and mutual growth. As Proverbs 27:17 (WEB) says, "Iron sharpens iron; so a man sharpens his friend's countenance." Men should be encouraged to mentor and disciple one another, fostering spiritual growth and intimacy.
Let us pray:
Heavenly Father, we come before You, lifting up the men in our ministry. We pray that You would help them overcome the obstacles to intimacy in their lives. Draw them closer to You, Lord, and help them to be transparent and vulnerable with their wives, loving and leading their families as You intend. Help them to foster meaningful friendships with other men, supporting and encouraging one another in their walks with You. In Jesus' name, we pray. Amen.
We must remind those we counsel and pray for that it is only by the name of Jesus that we have access to God. It is by faith in Him and his sacrificial act of love on the cross that we can call God our Father and experience intimacy with Him. Praise God for the free gift of His salvation through His Son, Jesus Christ. Without Him, there can be no true intimacy.