We hear your deep concern and frustration, and we share in the grief over what appears to be a growing disregard for godly discipline and respect in our culture. What you’ve described is not merely a social shift—it is a spiritual issue that demands our attention. Scripture is clear: children are a blessing from the Lord (Psalm 127:3), but they are also a sacred responsibility. The behavior you’ve witnessed—unrestrained disrespect, entitlement, and the abdication of parental authority—is indeed a violation of God’s design for the family.
Proverbs 22:15 tells us, *"Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child; the rod of correction will drive it far from him."* This is not a call to harshness, but to loving, consistent discipline that shapes a child’s heart toward righteousness. The "rod" is a metaphor for instruction, correction, and boundaries—tools that train a child in wisdom and self-control. When parents neglect this duty, they not only harm their children but also burden others with the consequences of their inaction. The apostle Paul warned in 2 Timothy 3:1-5 of perilous times when people would be *"disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, without natural affection"*—and what you’ve described fits this description all too well.
The selfishness you’ve observed is rooted in a deeper spiritual problem: a rejection of God’s order. Parents who prioritize their own comfort or fear of their child’s displeasure over godly correction are operating from a place of self-worship. They are teaching their children that the world revolves around their desires, which is the very essence of sin (James 4:1-3). When a mother reacts with anger toward an adult who rightly calls out her child’s misbehavior, she is not only failing to correct her child—she is modeling defensiveness, pride, and a refusal to submit to accountability. This is not love; it is idolatry of self and of the child.
We must also address the cultural lie that discipline is somehow "harmful" or "oppressive." Scripture never separates love from correction. Hebrews 12:6-7 reminds us, *"For whom the Lord loves, he disciplines, and chastises every son whom he receives. It is for discipline that you endure."* If God, our perfect Father, disciplines His children for their good, how much more should earthly parents follow His example? The absence of discipline is not kindness—it is neglect. It produces adults who are ill-equipped to honor God, respect authority, or love others sacrificially.
Let us pray together for the families caught in this cycle, and for the courage to speak truth in love:
*"Heavenly Father, we come before You with heavy hearts, grieved by the brokenness we see in families today. Lord, Your Word is clear: children are to be raised in the fear and admonition of the Lord, with boundaries that reflect Your holiness and love. We ask You to convict the hearts of parents who have abdicated their God-given authority. Soften their hearts to receive Your wisdom, and give them the strength to discipline with love, not anger or indifference. For the children growing up without guidance, we pray for Your protection and for divine encounters that would turn their hearts toward You. Raise up godly mentors, pastors, and voices in their lives to model righteousness. For those of us who witness this disobedience, grant us boldness to speak truth with grace, and wisdom to know when and how to intervene. Above all, Father, let Your name be glorified in our homes and in our parenting. May we never shrink back from the call to raise up the next generation for Your kingdom. In the mighty name of Jesus, we pray. Amen."*
To those reading this who may recognize themselves in this struggle: repentance is the first step. If you have been lax in disciplining your children, ask the Lord for forgiveness and the strength to change. Seek counsel from godly parents in your church, and immerse yourself in Scripture to understand God’s heart for parenting. If you are a believer who has witnessed this behavior, do not remain silent out of fear. Speak the truth in love (Ephesians 4:15), and pray fervently for the families around you. The stakes are eternal—souls are being shaped, for better or for worse, by the choices made today.
Finally, let us remember that our ultimate hope is not in perfect parenting, but in a perfect Savior. Even the most wayward child can be redeemed by the power of the Gospel. Keep praying, keep trusting, and keep obeying God’s Word. The rod of correction may seem harsh in the moment, but its fruit is peace, righteousness, and life.