We hear your cry for help and want you to know that your pain is seen and your desire for freedom is heard. The self-hatred and shame you carry are not from God, for Scripture tells us, "For you formed my inmost being. You knit me together in my mother’s womb. I will give thanks to you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Your works are wonderful. My soul knows that very well" (Psalm 139:13-14). You are not "rubbish"—you are a masterpiece of the Creator, even when the enemy’s lies try to convince you otherwise.
The abuse you endured was evil, and it was never God’s will for you. The enemy seeks to steal, kill, and destroy (John 10:10), but Jesus came so that you might have life—and have it abundantly. Your worth is not defined by what was done to you or by the lies the enemy whispers in your ear. Your worth is defined by the blood of Christ, who loved you so much that He gave His life for you (John 3:16). You are deeply loved, and that love is not based on your performance, appearance, or past—it is based on His grace.
We rebuke the spirit of self-hatred and shame in the name of Jesus. These are not your burdens to carry, for Christ has already borne them on the cross. "Come to me, all you who labor and are heavily burdened, and I will give you rest" (Matthew 11:28). Lay this weight at His feet and refuse to pick it up again. The enemy wants you to believe you are unworthy of good things, but God’s Word says, "He who didn’t spare his own Son, but delivered him up for us all, how would he not also with him freely give us all things?" (Romans 8:32). You are worthy because He says you are.
We also want to gently address the mention of a "partner" in your request. If you are longing for companionship, we encourage you to seek a godly spouse—a fellow believer who will honor God and cherish you as Christ cherishes the Church (Ephesians 5:25). Marriage is a sacred covenant, and it is important to pursue relationships that align with God’s design. But even more than that, we pray that you would first find your identity and worth in Christ alone. A spouse cannot heal what only Jesus can restore.
Let us pray for you:
Heavenly Father, we come before You on behalf of our sister who is struggling under the weight of self-hatred and shame. Lord, we ask that You would break every chain of lies that the enemy has spoken over her life. Remind her of her true identity in Christ—that she is fearfully and wonderfully made, redeemed by Your blood, and deeply loved. Heal the wounds of her past, Lord, and replace her pain with Your peace. Fill her with Your Holy Spirit so that she may walk in the freedom You have purchased for her.
We rebuke the spirit of shame and self-loathing in Jesus’ name. We declare that she is not defined by her trauma but by Your love. Restore her joy, Lord, and help her to see herself as You see her—beautiful, capable, and worthy of every good gift You have for her. Strengthen her faith and help her to trust in Your promises. May she experience Your presence in a tangible way and find rest in Your arms.
We pray for godly relationships to surround her—friends, mentors, and a future spouse who will reflect Your love and encourage her in her walk with You. But above all, Lord, let her know that she is complete in You alone. May she find her worth in Your unchanging love and walk in the freedom that is hers through Christ Jesus. In His mighty name, we pray. Amen.
You are not alone in this battle. The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit (Psalm 34:18). Keep pressing into Him, and surround yourself with believers who can speak truth into your life. You are a child of God, and He has a purpose for you that is greater than the pain of your past. Keep your eyes on Him, and do not let the enemy steal your joy. You are loved, you are valued, and you are free in Christ.
