We hear the ache in your heart, and we lift it before the Lord with deep compassion. Marriage is a sacred covenant, not just between two people, but before God Himself. He designed it to reflect His unending love and faithfulness, and when it fractures, His heart grieves with yours. The emptiness you feel in that bed is a reminder of the bond He intended to be unbroken—a bond that can still be restored by His power.
We must first acknowledge where things may have strayed from God’s design. Youthful pride often leads us to believe we know better than the wisdom of Scripture or the counsel of those who have walked this path before us. Proverbs 16:18 warns, *"Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall."* Yet even in our failures, God’s grace is sufficient. His Word tells us in 1 John 1:9, *"If we confess our sins, he is faithful and righteous to forgive us the sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness."* Have you both humbled yourselves before the Lord, confessing where you may have prioritized your own desires over His will for your marriage?
Restoration begins with repentance—not just for the actions that led to this pain, but for the pride that may have kept you from seeking God’s guidance sooner. James 4:6 reminds us, *"But he gives more grace. Therefore it says, 'God resists the proud, but gives grace to the humble.'"*
We also must address the hardness of heart that can settle in when we grow accustomed to the idea of separation. You mentioned thinking you were "fine with it," but God’s Spirit is stirring conviction within you. That is the Holy Spirit calling you back to His original plan. Malachi 2:16 declares, *"For I hate divorce... so guard yourself in your spirit, and don’t be unfaithful."* This is not a condemnation but a loving warning from a Father who desires wholeness for His children.
Now, let us come before the Lord together in prayer:
Heavenly Father, we come before You with heavy hearts, lifting up this marriage that is hanging by a thread. Lord, You are the God who makes all things new, who heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds. We ask You to intervene in this situation, not because of our worthiness, but because of Your great mercy and Your desire to see Your children walking in Your ways.
Father, soften both of their hearts toward one another and toward You. Break down the walls of pride, bitterness, or indifference that have built up over time. Replace them with humility, forgiveness, and a willingness to fight for this covenant You have ordained. Remind them of the vows they made before You—not just to each other, but to You—and give them the strength to honor those vows.
Lord, we ask You to reveal any areas where they have strayed from Your design for marriage. If there has been unfaithfulness, whether in action or in heart, bring it to light and lead them to true repentance. If there has been neglect, selfishness, or a lack of love, convict them and show them how to change. Fill them with Your love, which covers a multitude of sins, and teach them how to love one another as You have loved them.
We rebuke the spirit of division that seeks to tear this marriage apart. We declare that what God has joined together, no man—or enemy—should separate. We speak life, healing, and restoration over this union. Father, give them a fresh vision for what their marriage can be when it is centered on You. Let them see one another through Your eyes, with grace and compassion.
We pray for wisdom and guidance as they navigate this difficult season. Surround them with godly counsel—men and women who will speak Your truth in love and hold them accountable to Your Word. Protect their minds from the lies of the enemy, who would tell them this is hopeless. Instead, fill them with hope in Your promises.
Above all, Lord, we ask that You be glorified in this marriage. May their restoration be a testimony to Your power and Your faithfulness. May it point others to You and remind them that no situation is too broken for Your healing touch.
We ask all of this in the mighty name of Jesus, the One who reconciled us to You and who is able to reconcile this husband and wife to one another. Amen.
Friend, we want to encourage you with this truth: God is not finished with your marriage. The fact that you are reaching out for prayer is evidence of His work in your heart. Do not give up. Ecclesiastes 4:12 tells us, *"A threefold cord is not quickly broken."* When you invite God into your marriage, He becomes that third strand, strengthening and sustaining you both.
Here are some practical steps to take as you seek restoration:
1. **Pray together.** If possible, set aside time each day to pray with your spouse. Even if it feels awkward at first, persist. Matthew 18:19-20 assures us, *"Again, assuredly I tell you, that if two of you will agree on earth concerning anything that they will ask, it will be done for them by my Father who is in heaven. For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there I am in the midst of them."*
2. **Seek godly counsel.** Proverbs 11:14 says, *"Where there is no counsel, the people fall; but in the multitude of counselors there is safety."* Find a pastor, a Christian marriage counselor, or a couple who has walked through restoration and can offer biblical guidance.
3. **Examine your own heart.** It is easy to focus on your spouse’s faults, but restoration begins with personal repentance. Ask God to show you where you have fallen short in your role as a husband or wife. Psalm 139:23-24 is a good prayer for this: *"Search me, God, and know my heart. Try me, and know my thoughts. See if there is any wicked way in me, and lead me in the everlasting way."*
4. **Forgive.** Holding onto bitterness will only poison your heart and hinder restoration. Colossians 3:13 instructs, *"Bear with one another, and forgive each other, if any man has a complaint against any; even as Christ forgave you, so you also do."* Forgiveness does not mean what happened was okay; it means you are releasing the debt to God and choosing to trust Him with justice.
5. **Fight for your marriage.** Restoration is not passive. It requires intentionality, sacrifice, and perseverance. Ephesians 6:12 reminds us, *"For our wrestling is not against flesh and blood, but against the principalities, against the powers, against the world’s rulers of the darkness of this age, and against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places."* This is a spiritual battle, and you must put on the full armor of God (Ephesians 6:10-18) to stand firm.
6. **Guard your heart and mind.** Be mindful of what you allow to influence you. This includes media, friendships, or even your own thoughts. Philippians 4:8 says, *"Finally, brothers, whatever things are true, whatever things are honorable, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report; if there is any virtue, and if there is any praise, think about these things."*
7. **Remember God’s faithfulness.** Look back on your marriage and recall the ways God has been faithful. Even in the difficult seasons, He has been present. Lamentations 3:22-23 reminds us, *"It is because of Yahweh’s loving kindnesses that we are not consumed, because his compassion doesn’t fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness."*
Lastly, we want to leave you with this promise from Joel 2:25: *"I will restore to you the years that the swarming locust has eaten, the hopper, the destroyer, and the cutter, my great army, which I sent among you."* God is able to restore what has been lost, to heal what has been broken, and to redeem what has been damaged. Trust Him with your marriage, and watch what He will do.