Your heartfelt cry for protection over your home and your children has been heard, and the Lord sees your tears and hears your prayers. You are right to come with gratitude and urgency to Jesus, for salvation and safety are found in Him alone, and it is His blood shed on the cross that covers and cleanses those who trust in Him.
Scripture teaches that God puts a hedge of protection around His people. He gives His angels charge over you to guard you in all your ways, and He invites you to rest under the shadow of His wings. That is where true peace is found, not in striving or fear, but in staying close to Him. One of the apostles exhorts us to keep ourselves in the love of God, because when we walk away from Him we step outside that place of protection and fellowship. Your desire for a home filled with peace that passes understanding, with every door and window and room guarded by His presence, is a godly desire, and you can ask Him daily to fill your home with His glory and to let your rest be deep and quiet in Him.
The Lord also knows how to deliver the righteous when they are vexed and burdened by the ungodly influences around them. Lot was deeply distressed by the manner of life he saw around him, yet God in mercy led him and his family out and delivered him. Peter points to that deliverance as a picture that God still knows how to rescue His own while reserving the ungodly for judgment. This is a promise for you and for your older daughter. God is able to open her eyes to truth and to break every tie that binds her to what is not His will for her. He is able to deliver her from feeling obligated, trapped, or stripped of self worth, and to restore her longing for home, for righteousness, and for the purpose He has anointed her with.
Part of that deliverance involves seeing relationships as God sees them. Marriage is a lifelong covenant before God between one man and one woman, and living together and sharing the intimacies of marriage outside of that covenant is not marriage in His eyes. It does not bring the covering and blessing that marriage brings, but often brings exhaustion, isolation, division, and confusion, just as you have described. Out of love, we cannot ask God to bless that arrangement, but we can and do ask Him to give your daughter wisdom, clarity, and courage to step away from it, to be released from any ungodly hold or control, and to be restored to fellowship with her family and with the Lord. Pray that she will no longer imitate rebellion or disrespect, but will remember who she is in Christ and return to the values she was raised with. Just as Ruth asked her kinsman redeemer to spread his covering over her, so Jesus, our true Redeemer, longs to spread His covering of grace and redemption over your daughter and to bring her into safety and wholeness.
You also described a painful pattern of manipulation and control, including a mother exerting an ungodly influence over her son and through him over your daughter, even to the point of creating conditions for family time and financial demands. Scripture warns that some of the most harmful influences can come through a parent who does not walk with God, leading a child into evil paths. You can bring this before the Lord as David did when he prayed, plead my cause against an ungodly influence and deliver me from the deceitful person. Ask God to frustrate every plan that seeks to cause division and isolation in your family, to block every scheme that would keep your daughter away, and to turn the hearts of all involved toward truth. Pray that this young man would be led to step back to his own family and take time to mature, rather than continuing a relationship he is not ready for.
For your son, you can pray with confidence that Jesus is gentle and compassionate toward him. Ask the Lord to calm his thoughts and emotions, to quiet fear and frustration, to give him rest free from torment, and to fill his dreams with comfort and peace. Pray that God will help him grow in using clear, functional language to express his needs and feelings, and that He will clothe him with a calm and gracious spirit, the mind of Christ, day by day. Healing and help are in God's hands, and you can trust your son to His loving care, asking for His mercy to guard his heart and mind.
For your younger daughter, continue to ask for God's healing power over her body, protection over her mind, and favor over her schooling and future work. Pray that He will surround her with uplifting, godly friendships and, in His perfect time, a godly spouse if it is His will, and that He will comfort her in the hurt she feels as she watches her sister change. Ask that she will sleep peacefully, confident in His love.
For yourself, ask for the wisdom, grace, strength, and courage you need to navigate this season with love and truth. Pray that God will plead your cause, restore unity and joy to your family gatherings, and bless your finances so you can be a blessing to others. Pray for a year marked not by chaos but by love, unity, laughter, and unexpected mercies from His hand.
May the Lord keep you and your children tonight and in the days ahead, let His light shine into every dark place, and guard your hearts in His perfect peace. In the mighty name of Jesus Christ we pray for His covering, His mercy, and His power to restore what has been broken and to lead your family in His way. Amen.
