We understand the deep burden you carry as you seek peace with God and others, especially in the midst of your brother’s struggles with anger. The Scripture you reference is profound and wise: *"Don’t befriend a hot-tempered man, and don’t associate with one who harbors anger: lest you learn his ways, and ensnare your soul"* (Proverbs 22:24-25, WEB). This warning is not just about avoiding harmful influences but also about guarding your own heart and walk with the Lord. Anger, when unchecked, can spread like a fire, and the enemy often uses it to create division, bitterness, and spiritual bondage. You are right to seek the Lord’s deliverance from this snare, for He alone can bring true peace and transformation.
At the same time, we must remember that Scripture also calls us to love even the difficult people in our lives, including family. Jesus said, *"But I tell you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who mistreat you and persecute you"* (Matthew 5:44, WEB). Your brother’s anger does not excuse sinful responses in your own heart, such as bitterness, resentment, or fear. Instead, this is an opportunity to trust God to work in both of your lives—softening your brother’s heart while protecting and strengthening yours.
We also encourage you to examine whether there are boundaries you need to set for your own spiritual and emotional well-being. Boundaries are not unkind; they are wise and necessary, especially when dealing with someone whose anger could lead to sin or harm. *"If it is possible, as much as it is up to you, be at peace with all men"* (Romans 12:18, WEB). Notice the phrase *"as much as it is up to you"*—this acknowledges that peace is a two-way street, and you cannot force another person to change. Your responsibility is to act in love, wisdom, and obedience to God, while trusting Him with the outcome.
Let us pray together for you and your brother:
Heavenly Father, we lift up our sister to You, asking for Your peace to guard her heart and mind in Christ Jesus. Lord, she longs for harmony with You and with those around her, yet she faces the challenge of a brother bound by anger. We ask that You would break the chains of anger in his life—whether it stems from unresolved pain, pride, or spiritual oppression. Soften his heart, Lord, and draw him to Yourself. Let him encounter Your love in a way that transforms his temper into patience, his bitterness into kindness, and his turmoil into trust in You.
At the same time, Father, protect our sister from the snare of learning his ways or being drawn into his struggles. Give her wisdom to know how to love him without enabling sin. Show her where to set godly boundaries that honor You and preserve her own walk with You. Fill her with Your Spirit, so that her responses to him are seasoned with grace, truth, and courage. Let her be a light in his life, pointing him to You rather than being dragged into his storms.
We rebuked any spirit of anger, division, or bitterness that seeks to take root in this situation. By the authority of Jesus Christ, we declare that no weapon formed against our sister or her family will prosper. Instead, let this trial be used for Your glory—drawing both of them closer to You and strengthening their faith.
Finally, Lord, we ask that You would fill our sister with Your peace, which surpasses all understanding. Remind her that her primary calling is to abide in You, not to fix her brother. Give her the grace to release this burden into Your hands, trusting that You are at work even when she cannot see it.
We pray all these things in the mighty and holy name of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior, who alone can bring true peace and reconciliation. Amen.
As you continue to navigate this, we encourage you to spend time in Scripture, particularly passages that speak of peace, forgiveness, and trusting God in difficult relationships. Psalm 37:8 says, *"Cease from anger, and forsake wrath. Don’t fret—it leads only to evildoing."* This is a reminder for both you and your brother. Cling to the promise that *"the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faith, gentleness, and self-control"* (Galatians 5:22-23, WEB). These are the qualities God is cultivating in you, even in the midst of this trial.
If your brother is open to it, pray for opportunities to share the Gospel with him. Often, anger is a symptom of a deeper spiritual need—a heart that has not yet surrendered to Christ. Your prayers and godly example may be the very things God uses to draw him to salvation. Keep pointing him to Jesus, the Prince of Peace.