We grieve with you over the brokenness in your marriage, for sin always brings destruction, and unfaithfulness is a grievous violation of God’s holy design for marriage. The Scriptures are clear: *"Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed is undefiled; but God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterers"* (Hebrews 13:4, WEB). Your confession is a necessary first step, but true repentance requires turning away from sin and seeking restoration through Christ alone. There is no justification for adultery—it is a betrayal of your wife, your covenant before God, and your own soul. The fact that you acknowledge this was your choice, not hers, is critical. Now, you must take full responsibility without shifting blame to circumstances, her emotions, or the past. *"If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and righteous to forgive us the sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness"* (1 John 1:8-9, WEB).
Your wife’s pain is profound, and her request for you to leave reflects the shattered trust you’ve caused. While you express that your feelings for her haven’t changed, feelings alone cannot heal what has been broken. What she needs—and what God commands—is *action*: a demonstration of genuine repentance through humility, patience, and a transformed life. *"Let the wicked forsake his way, and the unrighteous man his thoughts; and let him return to Yahweh, and he will have mercy on him; and to our God, for he will freely pardon"* (Isaiah 55:7, WEB). This means cutting off all contact with anyone involved in your infidelity, submitting to accountability (such as a pastor or mature believer), and pursuing your wife’s heart with the same intensity you once pursued sin. If she is unwilling to reconcile—and she may not be—you must respect her boundaries while continuing to live in repentance, trusting God’s sovereignty over the outcome.
You mention praying for "things to get better for everyone," but we must clarify: reconciliation is not guaranteed, nor is it the primary goal. The primary goal is *your obedience to Christ*, regardless of the result. If your wife chooses to end the marriage, you must accept the consequences of your actions, though we pray she would extend forgiveness as Christ has forgiven you. *"Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the assembly, and gave himself up for her; that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, that he might present the church to himself gloriously, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she should be holy and without defect"* (Ephesians 5:25-27, WEB). Your love for her must now mirror Christ’s sacrificial love—patient, selfless, and unwavering, even if she rejects you.
We also note that your prayer request did not invoke the name of Jesus, the only name by which we are saved and through whom we approach the Father. *"There is salvation in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven that is given among men, by which we must be saved!"* (Acts 4:12, WEB). Without Christ, there is no forgiveness, no healing, and no hope. If you have not surrendered your life to Him, repent today and believe in His death and resurrection for your sins. If you *have* trusted in Him, then cling to His cross now, for it is there that mercy flows.
Let us pray together:
Heavenly Father, we come before You in the name of Jesus, broken over this man’s sin and the devastation it has wrought. Lord, You hate divorce (Malachi 2:16), yet You also hate adultery, which profanes the covenant You designed to reflect Christ and the Church. We ask for Your conviction to pierce his heart so deeply that he turns from every hint of unfaithfulness, fleeing temptation as Joseph did (Genesis 39:12). Grant him the strength to walk in purity, even if it means lifelong singleness. Softens his wife’s heart, Lord, but only as it aligns with Your will. If reconciliation is possible, let it be built on Your truth, not empty promises. If not, give him the grace to accept the consequences with humility.
Father, we rebuked the enemy’s lies that would tempt him to despair or return to sin. Fill him with Your Spirit, that he may produce fruit in keeping with repentance: patience, kindness, and self-control (Galatians 5:22-23). Remind him daily that Your mercy is new every morning (Lamentations 3:22-23), but that mercy never excuses sin—it empowers obedience. Surround this couple with godly counsel, and if they are not in a Bible-believing church, lead them to one where they can be shepherded in truth.
For the wife, Lord, we pray for Your comfort. Heal her wounds, restore her dignity, and guard her from bitterness. Show her Your love in tangible ways, whether through Your people or Your Word. If she is open to reconciliation, prepare her heart to forgive *as You have forgiven her*. If she is not, grant her peace and clarity for the future.
Finally, Lord, we ask that You would use this pain for Your glory. Let it be a testimony of Your redemption, whether in restoration or in the refining of two lives surrendered to You. In Jesus’ mighty name, Amen.
To you, brother: The road ahead will be hard, but it is not hopeless in Christ. *"The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit. A broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise"* (Psalm 51:17, WEB). Walk in transparency—confess your sin to your pastor, seek accountability, and immerse yourself in Scripture. Avoid any contact with the person(s) involved in your infidelity. If your wife allows communication, let your words be few and your actions consistent. Show her through time, not just words, that you are a new creation (2 Corinthians 5:17).
If she does not reconcile, you must still honor her as your wife in the Lord (1 Peter 3:7), praying for her and providing for her as you are able, unless she remarries (in which case, your marriage covenant is permanently broken, Matthew 19:9). But even then, your call is to holiness. The Lord sees your repentance, and He is near to the brokenhearted (Psalm 34:18). Cling to Him.
Prayer Focus: God, Thank You for loving me. God, I ask You in Jesus’ name please bless me with everything that I stand in need of and everything You want me to have. 
May God in Jesus' name answer your prayer request for healing and deliverance according to God's perfect love, wisdom, will, timing, grace, and mercy. God Loves You. Thank You Jesus!!!
