We hear your cry for help, and we stand with you in prayer, lifting this heavy burden before the Lord. Anger that manifests in yelling, cursing, and unrighteous outbursts is not of God, for the Word tells us, "Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, outcry, and slander be put away from you, with all malice. And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving each other, just as God also in Christ forgave you" (Ephesians 4:31-32). The behavior you describe is not only damaging to your marriage but also grieves the Holy Spirit, who desires peace, patience, and self-control in our lives.
First, we must address the sin of unrighteous anger in this situation. Scripture is clear that anger itself is not always sinful—God Himself expresses righteous anger—but the anger described here is rooted in pride, selfishness, and a lack of self-control. "A man of great wrath will bear the penalty, for if you rescue him, you must do it again" (Proverbs 19:19). This kind of anger does not produce the righteousness of God (James 1:20), and it must be repented of. We rebuke this spirit of anger in the name of Jesus Christ, for it has no place in a marriage that is meant to reflect Christ’s love for His church.
We also want to gently but firmly address the state of your marriage. A marriage where one spouse consistently responds with sinful anger is not functioning as God designed. Marriage is a covenant, a sacred bond where both husband and wife are called to submit to one another out of reverence for Christ (Ephesians 5:21). When one spouse is ruled by anger, it creates an environment of fear, resentment, and brokenness rather than love, respect, and unity. We pray that God would soften hearts and bring conviction where it is needed.
Now, we lift this situation to the Lord in prayer:
Heavenly Father, we come before You with heavy hearts, lifting up this marriage to You. Lord, You see the pain, the frustration, and the brokenness that unrighteous anger has brought into this home. We ask that You would intervene in power and might, breaking the chains of anger and pride that have taken hold. Father, we pray for repentance—soften the heart of the one who is struggling with anger, that they may see their sin and turn to You for healing. Give them a spirit of humility, gentleness, and self-control, that they may respond to conflict with wisdom and grace, as You have called them to do.
Lord, we also pray for the one who has been on the receiving end of this anger. Strengthen them, Father. Give them the courage to address these issues with love and truth, but also the wisdom to know when to speak and when to seek godly counsel. Protect their heart from bitterness and resentment, and help them to extend grace even in the midst of difficulty. Remind them that their worth is found in You alone, not in the approval or behavior of their spouse.
Father, we ask that You would restore this marriage. Where there is strife, bring peace. Where there is division, bring unity. Where there is hurt, bring healing. Teach both spouses to communicate with love, patience, and respect, modeling the relationship between Christ and His church. Surround them with godly mentors and counselors who can speak truth into their lives and guide them toward restoration.
Lord, we also pray for accountability. If this anger has escalated to a point where it is abusive—whether emotionally, verbally, or physically—we ask that You would bring it to light and provide a way of escape. No one should endure abuse, and we pray that You would give wisdom and courage to seek help if it is needed. Protect this marriage from the enemy’s schemes, who seeks to destroy what You have joined together.
Finally, Lord, we pray that both spouses would draw near to You. Only in You can true transformation take place. Fill them with Your Holy Spirit, that they may walk in love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control (Galatians 5:22-23). May their marriage be a testimony to Your grace and power, shining Your light in a world that so desperately needs it.
We ask all of this in the mighty name of Jesus Christ, the Prince of Peace, who alone can bring healing and restoration. Amen.
Brother, we want to encourage you to seek godly counsel from your pastor or a trusted Christian counselor who can walk alongside you in this journey. Marriage is worth fighting for, but it must be fought with the weapons of God—prayer, truth, love, and humility. Do not grow weary in doing good, for in due season, you will reap if you do not faint (Galatians 6:9). Stand firm in your faith, and trust that God is at work even in the midst of this struggle.
If your spouse is unwilling to change or seek help, we urge you to set healthy boundaries while continuing to pray for their heart. You cannot change them, but God can. Trust in Him, lean on Him, and allow His strength to sustain you. "The Lord is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves such as have a contrite spirit" (Psalm 34:18). You are not alone in this. We stand with you, and more importantly, God stands with you.
Prayer Focus: God, Thank You for loving me. God, I ask You in Jesus’ name please bless me with everything that I stand in need of and everything You want me to have. God bless me to prosper, walk in excellent health, and never stop growing in the love, grace, and knowledge of Christ Jesus. God bless me to know You in truth, fall in love with You with all my heart, mind, soul, body, and strength and never fall out of love with You. Bless me to have an ever growing closer stronger, more intimate relationship with You. Bless me with the love, desire, strength, and the spirit of obedience to always delight myself in You, seek first Your kingdom, Your righteousness, and to always respect and obey You. Bless me to trust You with all my heart, acknowledge You in all my ways, and lean not to my own understanding.
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