We hear your heart, dear one, and we stand with you in seeking God’s wisdom and clarity for this relationship. First, we must gently yet firmly address something critical: the Bible teaches that a godly connection—one truly ordained by God—will always align with His Word. If this relationship is causing confusion, blockages, and spiritual struggle, we must ask: Is it truly "God-given," or is it a test of discernment? The enemy often disguises counterfeit connections as divine, especially when they stir up unrest in our hearts. Scripture warns, *"Beloved, don’t believe every spirit, but test the spirits, whether they are of God"* (1 John 4:1 WEB). Have you tested this relationship against God’s standards for marriage—faithfulness, purity, mutual submission to Christ, and a shared foundation in Him?
You mention feeling lost even in your faith, and that is a red flag. A relationship that honors God will *strengthen* your walk with Him, not weaken it. If this person is not a believer, or if they are leading you into sin (such as fornication, emotional dependency, or idolatry of the relationship itself), then this is not the "connection" God intends for you. *"Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers, for what fellowship have righteousness and iniquity? Or what communion has light with darkness?"* (2 Corinthians 6:14 WEB). Even if they profess faith, are they living it out in a way that edifies you? Are you both pursuing holiness together, or is this relationship built on feelings rather than godly commitment?
We must also rebuke the lie that "hard" automatically means "God’s will." The path of righteousness is narrow and difficult (Matthew 7:14), but that difficulty should refine you, not leave you in constant turmoil. If this relationship is marked by manipulation, lack of accountability, or repeated sin (such as sexual immorality or dishonesty), then these are not "blockages"—they are roadblocks placed by the enemy to keep you from God’s best. *"The thief comes only to steal, kill, and destroy. I came that they may have life, and may have it abundantly"* (John 10:10 WEB). Is this relationship stealing your peace, killing your joy, or destroying your faith? If so, it is not from God.
Let us pray for you now:
Heavenly Father, we come before You in the mighty name of Jesus Christ, the Author of our faith and the Prince of Peace. Lord, Your daughter/son is seeking clarity in this relationship, and we ask that You would flood their heart with Your truth. Father, if this connection is not of You, expose the deception and give them the courage to walk away. If it *is* of You, remove the confusion and replace it with Your perfect peace. Search their heart, Lord—reveal any idolatry, any compromise, any sin that is hindering their discernment. *"Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me"* (Psalm 51:10 WEB).
Father, we rebuke the spirit of confusion and deception that may be at work here. We declare that no weapon formed against Your child shall prosper (Isaiah 54:17), and we break every assignment of the enemy over this relationship. If this is not Your will, we ask that You close the door completely and redirect their heart to Your purpose. If it *is* Your will, we pray for repentance, restoration, and a renewed commitment to holiness. Give them wisdom to communicate with love and truth, and soften both of their hearts to hear Your voice.
Lord, we ask that You would be their foundation in this time of uncertainty. Remind them that their identity is in Christ, not in this relationship. Fill them with Your Holy Spirit so they may walk in confidence, not confusion. *"Trust in Yahweh with all your heart, and don’t lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight"* (Proverbs 3:5-6 WEB). We pray for godly counsel for them—mentors, pastors, or mature believers who can speak truth into this situation. Surround them with Your presence, Lord, and let them feel Your love in tangible ways.
Above all, Father, we pray that they would seek You first in all things. If this relationship is meant to be, let it be built on the rock of Your Word, not the shifting sands of emotion. If it is not, prepare their heart to let go and trust You for the future You have planned. We declare that You are their Provider, their Protector, and their Peace. In Jesus’ name, we pray. Amen.
Now, dear one, we encourage you to take these steps:
1. **Examine the relationship honestly.** Is this person a believer who is actively growing in Christ? Are you both committed to purity and marriage, or is this a casual or sinful relationship? If there is any sexual sin, repent and separate until marriage. *"Flee sexual immorality! ‘Every sin that a man does is outside the body,’ but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body"* (1 Corinthians 6:18 WEB).
2. **Seek godly counsel.** Talk to a pastor, mentor, or mature Christian who can offer biblical wisdom. *"Where there is no counsel, plans fail; but in a multitude of counselors they are established"* (Proverbs 15:22 WEB).
3. **Spend time in prayer and fasting.** Ask God to reveal His will clearly. *"Call to me, and I will answer you, and will show you great things, and difficult, which you don’t know"* (Jeremiah 33:3 WEB).
4. **Guard your heart.** If this relationship is causing more harm than good, it may be time to step away. *"Above all that you guard, guard your heart, for out of it is the wellspring of life"* (Proverbs 4:23 WEB).
5. **Focus on your relationship with Christ.** The more you seek Him, the clearer His will becomes. *"But seek first God’s Kingdom and his righteousness; and all these things will be given to you as well"* (Matthew 6:33 WEB).
Remember, God’s will is not a mystery—it is revealed in His Word and through the leading of the Holy Spirit. If this relationship is causing you to stumble in your faith, it is not worth the cost. Trust that God has someone far better for you, someone who will love you as Christ loves the Church (Ephesians 5:25). You are not lost—you are *loved*, and God is guiding you every step of the way. Keep your eyes on Him.
