We hear the deep cry of your heart, and we are moved with compassion for the pain and fear you are carrying. Your honesty about your struggle to trust Jesus and surrender to Him is something we take very seriously, for it is only through surrender that true healing and salvation come. You have expressed a desperate longing for salvation, and that very longing is evidence that God is already at work in you, drawing you to Himself. The fact that you are seeking prayer shows that the Holy Spirit is stirring within you, and we praise God for that.
Yet we must address something critical: salvation is not something you can earn or achieve by your own efforts, nor is it something you "make" happen for yourself. It is a gift of God, received by faith in Jesus Christ alone. You mentioned wanting the "gift of faith" and the "gift of repentance," and while these are indeed gifts from God, they are not given so that you can use them to save yourself. Rather, they are the very means by which you turn away from your sin and place your trust in Christ, who has already done everything necessary for your salvation. The Bible tells us in **Ephesians 2:8-9**, *"For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God, not of works, that no one would boast."* Your part is to receive what Jesus has already accomplished on the cross—where He took the punishment for your sins—and to trust in Him alone.
You also mentioned fearing death and judgment, and this fear is a reminder of how urgently you need the hope that is found only in Christ. The Bible warns in **Hebrews 9:27**, *"It is appointed for people to die once, and after this, judgment."* But for those who are in Christ, judgment has already been satisfied by His sacrifice. **John 5:24** promises, *"Most certainly I tell you, he who hears my word and believes him who sent me has eternal life, and doesn’t come into judgment, but has passed out of death into life."* Your fear can be replaced with peace when you place your faith in Jesus, for He has conquered death and offers you eternal life.
We also notice that you did not invoke the name of Jesus in your request, and this is something we must address with urgency. There is no other name under heaven by which we can be saved. **Acts 4:12** declares, *"There is salvation in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven that is given among men, by which we must be saved!"* Jesus Himself said in **John 14:6**, *"I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father, except through me."* If you desire salvation, you must come to God through Jesus Christ, confessing Him as Lord and believing in your heart that God raised Him from the dead (**Romans 10:9-10**).
Now, let us address the lies you have believed. The devil is a liar and the father of lies (**John 8:44**), and he seeks to keep you in bondage by whispering that you are beyond hope, that your sins are too great, or that God could never love you. But the truth is that *no one* is beyond the reach of God’s grace. The Apostle Paul, who once persecuted Christians, later wrote, *"This is a faithful saying, and worthy of all acceptance, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners; of whom I am chief"* (**1 Timothy 1:15**). If Paul—the "chief of sinners"—could be saved, so can you. Your past, your struggles, and even your current unbelief are not obstacles too great for God. He specializes in redeeming the broken.
You also mentioned being the "worst," and while we do not know the specifics of your sins, we do know that Jesus did not come to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance (**Luke 5:32**). Your awareness of your sinfulness is actually a sign of God’s conviction, which is meant to lead you to repentance—not to despair, but to hope in Him. **1 John 1:9** assures us, *"If we confess our sins, he is faithful and righteous to forgive us the sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness."*
As for God having a plan for you, the answer is a resounding *yes*. **Jeremiah 29:11** reminds us, *"For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says Yahweh, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you hope and a future."* But that plan begins with surrendering to Jesus as Lord. You cannot experience the fullness of His plan while resisting Him. He is calling you to lay down your burdens, your fears, and your self-reliance, and to trust Him completely.
Let us pray for you now with urgency and faith:
Heavenly Father, we lift up this precious soul to You, knowing that You desire all people to be saved and to come to the knowledge of the truth (**1 Timothy 2:4**). Lord Jesus, You see the deep pain, the fear, and the unbelief that has gripped this heart. We ask that You would break through every barrier and draw them to Yourself in a way they cannot resist. Holy Spirit, convict them of sin, righteousness, and judgment (**John 16:8**), and grant them the gift of repentance that leads to life (**Acts 11:18**).
Father, we rebuke every lie of the enemy that has kept this person in bondage—the lies that say they are too far gone, that God does not love them, or that they must earn their salvation. We declare that **nothing can separate them from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord** (**Romans 8:38-39**). We pray that You would open their eyes to see the truth of the Gospel, that while they were still sinners, Christ died for them (**Romans 5:8**).
Lord, we ask that You would grant them the faith to believe in Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior. Remove the hardness of heart and replace it with a spirit of surrender. Help them to understand that salvation is not about their own efforts, but about receiving Your free gift of grace. We pray that they would confess with their mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in their heart that God raised Him from the dead, that they may be saved (**Romans 10:9**).
We also pray for healing from the deep pain they carry. You are the God who binds up the brokenhearted (**Psalm 147:3**), and we ask that You would bring comfort, peace, and restoration. Replace their fear of death and judgment with the assurance of eternal life in You. Let them know that **whoever calls on the name of the Lord shall be saved** (**Romans 10:13**), and may they call on You *today*.
Father, we ask that You would make a way where there seems to be no way. Remove every obstacle that stands between them and full surrender to You. Give them the courage to turn away from sin and to follow You wholeheartedly. We pray that they would experience the truth of **2 Corinthians 5:17**: *"If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old things have passed away. Behold, all things have become new."*
Lord, we also pray for Your protection over them. Guard their mind and heart from the schemes of the enemy. Fill them with Your peace that surpasses all understanding (**Philippians 4:7**), and let them know that You are with them, even in this moment of struggle.
We thank You, Father, for Your mercy and grace that are new every morning (**Lamentations 3:22-23**). We trust that You are working in this situation, and we give You all the glory. May this person come to know You as their Savior and Lord, and may they walk in the freedom and joy of Your salvation. We ask all this in the mighty and precious name of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Redeemer. Amen.
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We urge you to take this step of faith *today*. Do not delay, for **now is the accepted time; behold, now is the day of salvation** (**2 Corinthians 6:2**). If you are ready to surrender to Jesus, you can pray something like this in your own words:
*"Lord Jesus, I confess that I am a sinner and that I cannot save myself. I believe that You died on the cross for my sins and that God raised You from the dead. I turn away from my sins and my unbelief, and I ask You to forgive me. I surrender my life to You and receive You as my Lord and Savior. Fill me with Your Holy Spirit and help me to follow You all the days of my life. Thank You for saving me. In Jesus’ name, Amen."*
If you pray this prayer with a sincere heart, the Bible promises that you *are* saved. We encourage you to find a Bible-believing church where you can grow in your faith, be baptized, and fellowship with other believers. Read God’s Word daily, and He will continue to transform your heart and mind.
We are here for you, and we will continue to pray for your complete surrender to Christ. May God bless you and keep you as you take this step of faith.
Prayer Focus: God, Thank You for loving me. God, I ask You in Jesus’ name please bless me with everything that I stand in need of and everything You want me to have. 
