Thank you for sharing your heart so openly. I join you in prayer and thank God for the hunger you have expressed to put Him first, to be dependent on Him completely, and to be content in Him in every season.
You quoted Matthew 6:33 and that is the right place to begin. When we seek His kingdom and His righteousness first, we trust Him to add what we need in His time and way. Proverbs 3:5 and 6 calls us to trust Him with all our heart and not lean on our own understanding, and to acknowledge Him in all our ways so He can direct our paths. Psalm 23:1 reminds us that because the Lord is our shepherd, we lack no good thing He knows we need. And 2 Corinthians 9:8 assures us that God is able to make all grace abound toward us so that we will have all we need and be able to abound in every good work He gives us to do.
Your desire to be consumed by Him, to have no idols or distractions, and to find your satisfaction in Him is precious. Scripture teaches that godliness with contentment is great gain. True riches are not found in a house or a car or any possession, for we brought nothing into this world and we can carry nothing out. Possessions can be gained and lost quickly and cannot be trusted to satisfy. Contentment that rests in circumstances will always rise and fall, but contentment that rests in your relationship with Jesus Christ can remain steady because He does not change. That does not mean the needs you mentioned are unimportant. He understands your need for transportation, for someone to teach you to drive, for a stable home for you and your animals, and for provision to care for them. It is right to bring those needs to Him and to be willing, as you said, to work or to go to school as He leads. The apostle Paul modeled that willingness to work with his own hands to provide for his needs while serving the Lord, and honest work is part of how God often provides.
You also mentioned the family situation and the negativity around you, and your longing not to become like that but to be like Him. When someone comes to belong to Jesus, it can create distance even within their own blood family. Jesus Himself experienced rejection in His own family and among His own people. Those who have come to faith often find that the deepest and most lasting bonds are now within the family of God, where brothers and sisters in Christ share a closer spiritual relationship than even natural ties when those natural ties do not share the same faith. God sees that tension and He understands it completely. The Holy Spirit bears witness to our hearts that forgiveness and acceptance with God comes only through His one provision, His Son who died for our sins. There is no other way for guilt to be put away, and when we receive that provision we enter into a new family that remains forever.
In the same way, I encourage you to keep seeking His guidance before making major decisions about work, schooling, housing, or other commitments. Scripture warns us not to make binding choices without first seeking His wisdom and counsel, otherwise we can become tied to something that is not His best. Prayer is essential for life and for guidance. Even the Son of God showed us the necessity of prayer, and how much more do we need it. Bring each step to Him, ask Him to open and close doors, and leave room for Him to work in ways you may not expect. The law once gave detailed instructions for what should happen if a leper were cleansed, even though leprosy was incurable by human means. God in that way left room for His own power to heal and to act. Do not put Him in a box. He is still able to make a way where there seems to be no way.
Your willingness to spend time with Him, to volunteer and serve, and to want to be used by Him in every season is a beautiful offering. Keep cultivating that. Find your contentment in Christ today, while you wait, and let that contentment be your strength whether you have much or little. As you do, ask Him to provide the practical help you need, to bring the right people to teach and support you, and to lead you clearly regarding work or training.
I pray for you now. Father, I thank You for this heart that wants You above all else. I thank You that You have provided forgiveness and new life through Your Son alone, and that Your Spirit testifies to that truth. Give peace in the midst of family difficulty, and surround this dear one with the encouragement of Your family. Teach us to pray and to seek Your guidance in every decision. Provide for the needs for transportation, housing, and care for these animals according to Your wisdom. Lead to the right work or schooling, and give contentment in Jesus that does not depend on circumstances. Make grace abound so that there is sufficiency for every good work You have prepared. Keep this heart close to You, free from idols, satisfied in You, and faithful to serve You in this season and in the seasons to come. In Jesus name, amen.