Silas
Beloved of All
Your honest and unfiltered prayer has been heard, and I thank you for trusting me with it. God heard you last night when all you could say was Father while you were struggling to breathe, and He answered through your sister's help. Scripture says the Spirit helps us when we do not know how to pray and intercedes for us when words fail, and that the Lord is near to those who are crushed and weary. He knows your heart completely even when your mind goes blank, when sentences will not come, and when you feel misunderstood by others.
I hear how exhausted you are after ### years of fighting to eat, to be believed, to get care, and now to simply live day to day. To be told for ### years that nothing was wrong and then to face two rare thyroid cancers, to have treatment delayed and then to suffer damage to your heart and your sight, to live with a traumatic brain injury and brain fog that makes communication so hard, to be denied help again, to lose transportation and have to walk to the bus while homeless on your sister's couch, and then to endure that frightening acid reflux attack that kept you awake until morning, all of this is an overwhelming weight. It is understandable that you feel mentally and physically tired and long for a long season of rest and recovery. It is also understandable that you feel pressure and fear about where you will live and how you will be provided for.
What you describe in your own body and life also reflects a deeper truth that Scripture shows us. The same spiritual sickness that brought destruction to Judah in the Bible is still at work in our world and in our nation today. That sickness is our turning away from God and trying to live without Him. Unless we receive the cure God Himself has provided, there is no other remedy that can truly heal us, and we remain captive to sin, fear, and despair. That cure is salvation through Jesus Christ alone. Medical care, housing, income, and even justice for what you suffered at the hospital are important needs and it is right to pursue them, but they cannot by themselves heal the heart or give the lasting light and clarity you are asking for. Only Christ can do that, and He offers rest to all who are weary and burdened when they come to Him.
God does see that you have been gaslighted and not believed, and He is not like that. Your primary care provider taking you seriously is a mercy, and I pray God will continue to give you doctors who listen and help within their limits. For the clarity you asked for, ask the Lord daily to steady your mind, to calm the jumping thoughts, and to give you peace as you wait on Him. He can give wisdom and a sound mind even when processing feels slow and foggy.
For the practical burdens, keep taking the next faithful step. If you appeal the denial, do it honestly and with the careful documentation you have prepared. Check your heart before the Lord as you do so. It is right to seek truth and accountability for harm done, but leave revenge to God and ask Him to keep your motives clean, to seek what is just and to honor Him. Keep caring for your breathing and your health, keep asking for help when you need it, and let your sister and others who are willing be part of God's provision for you right now.
I am praying for you now.
Father, thank You for saving this precious one the other night when breathing was so hard and for hearing even the single word Father. You know this heart fully when words are hard to form and thoughts are scattered. I ask You to be light in this darkness and to give rest to one who is so tired in body and mind. Bring healing according to Your will, steady breathing, clearer thought, and relief from fog. Provide for daily needs, for safe housing, for transportation, and for income. Grant favor and wisdom in the appeal and in seeking care, and guard the heart from bitterness while seeking what is right. Above all, hold this child close to Jesus, the only true cure for our deepest illness, and let Your peace guard heart and mind. In Jesus name, Amen.
I hear how exhausted you are after ### years of fighting to eat, to be believed, to get care, and now to simply live day to day. To be told for ### years that nothing was wrong and then to face two rare thyroid cancers, to have treatment delayed and then to suffer damage to your heart and your sight, to live with a traumatic brain injury and brain fog that makes communication so hard, to be denied help again, to lose transportation and have to walk to the bus while homeless on your sister's couch, and then to endure that frightening acid reflux attack that kept you awake until morning, all of this is an overwhelming weight. It is understandable that you feel mentally and physically tired and long for a long season of rest and recovery. It is also understandable that you feel pressure and fear about where you will live and how you will be provided for.
What you describe in your own body and life also reflects a deeper truth that Scripture shows us. The same spiritual sickness that brought destruction to Judah in the Bible is still at work in our world and in our nation today. That sickness is our turning away from God and trying to live without Him. Unless we receive the cure God Himself has provided, there is no other remedy that can truly heal us, and we remain captive to sin, fear, and despair. That cure is salvation through Jesus Christ alone. Medical care, housing, income, and even justice for what you suffered at the hospital are important needs and it is right to pursue them, but they cannot by themselves heal the heart or give the lasting light and clarity you are asking for. Only Christ can do that, and He offers rest to all who are weary and burdened when they come to Him.
God does see that you have been gaslighted and not believed, and He is not like that. Your primary care provider taking you seriously is a mercy, and I pray God will continue to give you doctors who listen and help within their limits. For the clarity you asked for, ask the Lord daily to steady your mind, to calm the jumping thoughts, and to give you peace as you wait on Him. He can give wisdom and a sound mind even when processing feels slow and foggy.
For the practical burdens, keep taking the next faithful step. If you appeal the denial, do it honestly and with the careful documentation you have prepared. Check your heart before the Lord as you do so. It is right to seek truth and accountability for harm done, but leave revenge to God and ask Him to keep your motives clean, to seek what is just and to honor Him. Keep caring for your breathing and your health, keep asking for help when you need it, and let your sister and others who are willing be part of God's provision for you right now.
I am praying for you now.
Father, thank You for saving this precious one the other night when breathing was so hard and for hearing even the single word Father. You know this heart fully when words are hard to form and thoughts are scattered. I ask You to be light in this darkness and to give rest to one who is so tired in body and mind. Bring healing according to Your will, steady breathing, clearer thought, and relief from fog. Provide for daily needs, for safe housing, for transportation, and for income. Grant favor and wisdom in the appeal and in seeking care, and guard the heart from bitterness while seeking what is right. Above all, hold this child close to Jesus, the only true cure for our deepest illness, and let Your peace guard heart and mind. In Jesus name, Amen.
