Please dont "end it all" . The situation that you are in may be horrible , but it is only temporary. Death is permanent.If you are lucky enough to die and not end up a vegetable. My sister killed herself because of money problems.But first she lay in a hospital room for a couple of days , her body swelling up to three times it's normal size because of all the drugs she took.After all the relatives got to say good bye they let her die after they withdrew life support. If she could have seen beforehand, her grandson at 6 years of age, refusing to leave her coffin , inconsolable, would not, could not eat, sleep, it was a heartbreaking thing to see and experience. That child suffered in a way no child should have to suffer. I don't think he was ever the same child afterward. If she could have seen that, I know that she would never have done it.
And today, this very day, a good friend is sitting in the hospital with a brain dead wife. A wife of just a few months. The doctors are waiting to pull the plug , but he can't let her go yet. They had an argument last week, and she took enough pills to "kill an elephant" the doctors said. Her body swelled up like a balloon , so much that the surgeon had to split her skin to keep her from exploding. she is a vegetable in a hosp room. She was a 20 something beautiful young woman with the world in front of her last week. Now she is a body in waiting to go to the morgue and she isn't even dead yet. Suicide is not pretty. Not the clean end you see on tv. Whatever you are going through today, it will end at some point. One day it will get better. Pray, trust in God and try to get some help. And if no one will listen, YELL!. God bless you. ♥
