celestial428
Disciple of Prayer
I need prayer big time bc I'm ready to puke. 1). I renewed my Medicaid on time in October...October keep in mind. I just today get notice they are going to terminate it onFeb 28th (yes your bday) bc of "failure to submit renewal". So I call and my paperwork is there but thanks to some person there who screwed up I have to go through eligibility all over including involving my dad bc of certain things they pay. 2). I know I have screwed my life up and made a bunch of mistakes but remember I feared my dad coming back to haunt me about my debt? He a) continuously is monitoring everything I do and trying to obtain my credit report which I'm sorry but I think I'm allowed some discretion and b) talks to a lady at the bank and wants me to FILE BANKRUPTCY! No. No no no. I know I messed up but to destroy everything left?
I'm literally near a full fledge "all of this is too much" between age, health, finances, dreams feeling shattered.
No husband or baby and he wants me to file bankruptcy and that is the final blow bc that would mean I couldn't get a job. As is who will want me with debt and health and wanting a baby let alone if I just wiped away the next 7 years too bc that is how long before you r even given a morsel of a chance if you file bankruptcy and even then you don't recover.
I am not filing that. No.
I have no idea how to get the knot out of my stomach or feel less despair right now. I don't feel right filing bankruptcy and I'm scared bc all I ever wanted was marriage and a child. I feel unworthy of that now, like all my mistakes are coming to haunt me and like dreams are gone. I know I'm supposed to trust and have faith but I feel like my nerves are frayed to the ends. I just can't file, I am sorry if that makes me seem awful but I want at least a chance to make it right with being able to try to go back to work at least part-time within a few months if (I pray for this as well) my health finally makes progress. Will anyone stand in prayer with me that I don't have to file and can receive some relief somehow and that my dreams of love, marriage, child can still happen despite my mistakes? Please.
I'm literally near a full fledge "all of this is too much" between age, health, finances, dreams feeling shattered.
No husband or baby and he wants me to file bankruptcy and that is the final blow bc that would mean I couldn't get a job. As is who will want me with debt and health and wanting a baby let alone if I just wiped away the next 7 years too bc that is how long before you r even given a morsel of a chance if you file bankruptcy and even then you don't recover.
I am not filing that. No.
I have no idea how to get the knot out of my stomach or feel less despair right now. I don't feel right filing bankruptcy and I'm scared bc all I ever wanted was marriage and a child. I feel unworthy of that now, like all my mistakes are coming to haunt me and like dreams are gone. I know I'm supposed to trust and have faith but I feel like my nerves are frayed to the ends. I just can't file, I am sorry if that makes me seem awful but I want at least a chance to make it right with being able to try to go back to work at least part-time within a few months if (I pray for this as well) my health finally makes progress. Will anyone stand in prayer with me that I don't have to file and can receive some relief somehow and that my dreams of love, marriage, child can still happen despite my mistakes? Please.
