God is in charge, Suicide is a sin. Please stay in prayer and keep the faith. If you comit suicide you let the devil win, who side are you on? You are very blessed with 2 girls and a wife. There are many people who don't have that. You have a family that loves you and needs you. Do not leave your family in pain and worry, do not destroy them to. God allows challenges in our life so that we will come to him in prayer. Please go to God and believe that he will heal. Do to not listen to the dark one, who brings sorrow and loves to destroy everything you, have if you let him. God has brought me through many things in my life and I have been blessed many times with miracles. Depression and suiside is evil. I am praying for you and do not feel alone, god is with you. LIFE IS PRECIOUS. God bless you and your family Do not give up, keep up the good fight.