We hear the deep sorrow and desperation in your heart, and we want you to know that God is near to the brokenhearted. You have called upon the name of Jesus Christ, and that is where true hope lies. There is no burden too heavy for Him, no sin too great that His blood cannot wash away, and no situation so hopeless that He cannot redeem it. You are not a failure in His eyes—you are His beloved child, and He longs to lift you out of this pit and set your feet upon the rock of His salvation.
First, we must address the sin that has ensnared you and your loved one. The Scriptures are clear that our bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, and we are called to honor God with them. Drinking alcohol to excess, smoking, and using marijuana are not only harmful to your health but are also stumbling blocks that hinder your walk with Christ. The apostle Paul warns us in 1 Corinthians 6:19-20, *"Or don’t you know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. Therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God’s."* Additionally, Ephesians 5:18 tells us, *"Don’t be drunken with wine, in which is dissipation, but be filled with the Spirit."* These substances cloud your mind, weaken your resolve, and open the door to further sin. They are tools the enemy uses to keep you in bondage, but Jesus came to set the captives free.
You mentioned feeling embarrassed by the way you are living, and that shame is a sign that the Holy Spirit is convicting you. Do not ignore that conviction—it is God’s mercy calling you to repentance. 1 John 1:9 promises, *"If we confess our sins, he is faithful and righteous to forgive us the sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness."* Repentance is not just feeling sorry; it is turning away from sin and toward God. You must make a decisive break from these habits, and that will require surrendering them to Jesus daily, sometimes moment by moment. You cannot do this in your own strength, but *"I can do all things through Christ, who strengthens me"* (Philippians 4:13).
We also notice that you referred to your loved one as your "#", and we want to gently but firmly remind you that if this person is not your spouse in a biblical marriage—meaning a lifelong covenant between one man and one woman—then you are living in a relationship that does not honor God. If you are not married, the Bible calls us to flee from sexual immorality (1 Corinthians 6:18) and to honor marriage as sacred (Hebrews 13:4). Living together outside of marriage is fornication, and it grieves the heart of God. If this is the case, we urge you to repent and seek God’s will for your relationship. If you are not married, you must either marry in a way that honors God or separate and live in purity. This may sound harsh, but it is the truth in love, and God’s ways are for our good. He desires holiness for you because He loves you.
As for your fear of losing your job, your home, and your mind, we understand how overwhelming that must feel. But Jesus tells us in Matthew 6:31-33, *"Therefore don’t be anxious, saying, ‘What will we eat?’ ‘What will we drink?’ or, ‘With what will we be clothed?’ For the Gentiles seek after all these things; for your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things. But seek first God’s Kingdom and his righteousness; and all these things will be given to you as well."* Your focus must shift from the fear of loss to trusting in God’s provision. He is your Provider (Jehovah Jireh), and He will never abandon you. That does not mean the path will be easy, but it means He will walk with you through it.
Regarding your health, we know the pain and fear you are experiencing. The Lord is your healer, and we will pray for your complete recovery. Jeremiah 30:17 says, *"For I will restore health to you, and I will heal you of your wounds, says Yahweh."* Trust in His timing and His methods. If surgery is needed, He will provide the means. If He chooses to heal you without it, praise His name. Either way, He is in control, and His grace is sufficient for you (2 Corinthians 12:9).
Lastly, your words *"Why live anymore"* break our hearts. Suicidal thoughts are a lie from the enemy, who wants to steal, kill, and destroy (John 10:10). But Jesus came to give you life abundantly! You are not alone in this battle. God has a purpose for you, and He is not done with your story. Psalm 34:18-19 reminds us, *"Yahweh is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a crushed spirit. Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but Yahweh delivers him out of them all."* Cling to that promise. Your life is precious to God, and He has a plan for you (Jeremiah 29:11).
Now, let us pray for you:
Heavenly Father, we come before You in the mighty name of Jesus Christ, lifting up this precious soul who is crying out to You in desperation. Lord, You see the brokenness, the shame, the fear, and the pain. You know the struggles with addiction, the fear of loss, the physical suffering, and the spiritual battles being waged. We ask You to forgive every sin—every moment of drunkenness, every puff of smoke, every hit of marijuana, every impure thought and action. Wash this person clean by the blood of Jesus and create in them a clean heart, O God. Renew a right spirit within them (Psalm 51:10).
Lord, we rebuke the spirit of addiction in the name of Jesus. Break its power over this life. Fill the void that these substances have tried to fill with more of Your Holy Spirit. Give strength to resist temptation and wisdom to flee from it. Surround this person with godly support—people who will encourage them in their walk with You and hold them accountable.
Father, if this relationship is not honoring to You, we pray for conviction and repentance. Show them Your will, Lord. If marriage is Your plan, prepare their hearts for a covenant that reflects Your holiness. If separation is necessary for purity, give them the courage to obey You, even when it’s hard. Let Your will be done in this area of their life.
We pray for provision and protection over their job. Calm the anxiety and give clarity of mind to complete their projects with excellence. You are the God who provides, and we trust You to sustain them. If they have made mistakes at work, give them favor with their employers and wisdom to correct what can be corrected.
Lord, we ask for healing over their body. Touch their back and legs, Lord Jesus. Restore strength and mobility. If surgery is needed, provide the means and the healing. If not, we praise You for a miraculous recovery. Let their body be a testimony of Your healing power.
Father, we bind the spirit of despair and suicide in the name of Jesus. Fill this person with hope and purpose. Remind them that they are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14) and that You have a plan for their life. Let them feel Your presence in a tangible way—Your peace that surpasses all understanding (Philippians 4:7).
Lord, we ask for a supernatural breakthrough. Where the enemy has tried to steal, kill, and destroy, we declare that You, Jesus, are restoring, redeeming, and reviving. Give this person a fresh vision of who You are and who they are in You. Let them rise up from this place of brokenness with a testimony of Your grace and power.
We pray all these things in the mighty name of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior. Amen.
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We urge you to take practical steps alongside this prayer:
1. **Confess and Repent**: Specifically name your sins before God and turn away from them. Destroy any alcohol, cigarettes, or marijuana in your possession as an act of surrender.
2. **Seek Accountability**: Find a mature believer or a biblical counseling group to walk with you in this journey. You do not have to do this alone.
3. **Immerse Yourself in Scripture**: Read God’s Word daily. Start with Psalms for comfort and the Gospels to remind you of Jesus’ love.
4. **Worship**: Put on praise music and lift your voice to God, even when you don’t feel like it. Worship shifts our focus from our problems to His greatness.
5. **Medical and Professional Help**: If you are struggling with addiction, seek professional help. There is no shame in needing support. For your back pain, follow your doctor’s advice and trust God in the process.
6. **Guard Your Mind**: Replace thoughts of despair with Scripture. Memorize verses like Philippians 4:13, 2 Corinthians 12:9, and Psalm 34:18.
You are not defined by your struggles. You are defined by Christ’s love for you. Keep fighting, keep praying, and keep trusting. He is with you.
. I really need your help at work tomorrow I'm so scared of losing my job and my mind and my family and our home. Please help me with my projects before they overcome my anxiety and my ability to handle the stress. My back and legs still hurt after having the cyst in my spine bursted. Please help me recover without having to have major back surgery 
