Ive Hit The Bottom Of My Life

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Sonya

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Help I have been in a toxic relationship for about 1 1/2 years and I am so tired of receving this man back into my life. I have an emotional attachment and always became weak when he would beg me to come back. I realize if someone loves me I will feel it. This relationship has had me broken and feeling used. I have prayed and cried over and over trying to ask God for a purpose and I have yet to receive an answer. I have begged God to give me enough strength to allow me to totally let leave him alone, I even went as far as changing my phone number. A few mouths had passed and I saw him in a local store and he saw me and expressed to everyone in the store how much he missed and cared about me. However, I have been putting my life on hold only to be hurt constantly. I am a widow and have started back dating and now I don;t even really want to give anyone else a chance. Its hard to trust someone with my feelings because every relationship Ive been in Ive been hurt. I am looking for God to intervene on my behalf I pray for a God-fearing husband however I become very upset with God for allowing me to be hurt again after my husband past or in any relationship. I understand God takes is from faith to faith and glory to glory however, I am not satisfied how my life has been for the past 7 years. Ive had season after season of unhappiness and tribulation but through it all Ive conquered. Im so heartbroken and wonder why God always allow me to be hurt. I had lead a life of celibacy and followed the word of God, until I became distracted. It seemed that God allowed some things to happen and I wonder why if I had been praying all this time to do the right thing why do I always get hurt. I feel very angry with God and want to give up on him because it seems as if he has given up on me in all areas of my life. I hate my life so much and he knows why. At one time my faith was so strong I believed God for any and everything only to be disappointed over and over again. I would read my word consistanly and I feel betrayed. I cry out and it doesn't help anymore. I have committed my days to total silence because I just don't know what else to do. If suicide were an option in Christianity I would have done it several times in my life. I feel like Im dying inside anyway.

Please pray for my strenght and the ability to get rid of people who want to harm my future for their own selfishness. I want a husband ordained by God and not satan. Also pray for my mental and emotional healing as I go through.
 
I am praying for Sonya to recover her faith, her love for God and his ways. It is not up to us to understand his ways but it is up to us to put our lives completely at his feet so that he may do with us his will. Sonya knows in her heart that eeven though she wants God to stay away he will never levae her, he will always be near to hold her and support her. Dear Jesus bless this woman who has suffered so much, give her a break Lord, touch her and make her well. Thank you Jesus in you we trust
 
dear lord, i pray that you show her mercy, guidenece, i pray that you give her strenght, i pray that you provide her with a christian husband for her, i pray lord, that you answer her prayers, i pray that you bless her abundantly in all areas of life, i pray that you watch over her and protect her from all manner of attacks by satan and his demons, in jesus name amen
 
MY SISTER IN CHRIST GOD HAS NOT GIVEN UP ON YOU HE HAS NOT FORGOTTEN YOU IT IS JUST A TEST HE WANT US TO GIVE HIM ALL OF US NOT PART OR SOME BUT OUR WHOLE LIFE HE WANT US TO TRUST HIM LOVE HIM BELIEVE IN HIM THAT HE CAN DO ALL THINGS BUT FAIL GIVE HIM YOUR HURT AND PAIN TRUST HIM THAT HE WILL BRING DELIVERANCE TO YOUR SOUL DONT GIVE UP ON YOUR SELF SWEETIE BELIEVE THAT GOD THE FATHER THE ALMIGHTLY ONE THE ONE TRUE GOD WHITCH IS JESUS CHRIST IS ABLE TO BRING YOU TRUE HAPPYNESS FROM HEAVEN AND GIVE THE DISIRE OF YOUR HEART SO TRUST IN THE LORD GIVE HIM BACK HIS WORD GOD WANT US TO GIVE HIM BACK HIS WORDS YOU SAID YOU READ ALOT GIVE GOD PRAISE PRAISE HIM NOW HELP IS ON THE WAY GOD BLESS
 
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