Don't you understand that is exactly what satan wants to happen, don't you see that he is doing everything in his power to keep you from God and trusting Him. The bible tells us that satan comes to steal, kill, and to destroy and you are listening to the lies of the enemy. The Lord does not always answer our prayers the way we want Him to, we have to trust that He knows what is best for us. It is sad to think that we will only love and follow Jesus if He does everything that we want Him to. The Lord never said that living for Him would be easy, He said to take up your cross and follow me, it is a choice to either press closer to God or be satisfied where we are. Do we only care to serve Him if things always go our way. God is God and He should be worshiped simply for who He is.