We understand the deep ache of your heart in this situation, and we want to walk with you in truth, love, and prayer as we seek God’s will together. Your pain is real, and we know how hard it is to surrender someone you love deeply to the Lord, especially when it feels like your prayers are going unanswered. But let us first address something critical: your prayer seems focused on *removing* this person from your life if they are not God’s will for you. While we understand the desire for clarity and even relief from heartache, we must ask—are you praying for *God’s will* to be done, or are you praying for your own comfort? There is a difference, and the Lord often refines us in the waiting.
The Bible tells us in **1 John 5:14-15 (WEB)**, *“This is the boldness which we have toward him, that if we ask anything according to his will, he listens to us. And if we know that he listens to us, whatever we ask, we know that we have the petitions which we have asked of him.”* The key here is *according to His will*. If your prayers are centered on your own timing or emotional relief rather than submission to God’s perfect plan, He may be waiting for your heart to align with His. Sometimes, the silence is not a “no” but a call to deeper trust.
We also notice that you haven’t mentioned the name of Jesus in your request. This is vital, for **John 14:13-14 (WEB)** says, *“Whatever you will ask in my name, I will do it, that the Father may be glorified in the Son. If you will ask anything in my name, I will do it.”* There is *no other name* by which we can approach the Father (Acts 4:12). If you are not praying in Jesus’ name, you are not accessing the full power and authority given to believers. We strongly encourage you to examine your prayers—are you coming before God through Christ, or are you praying out of your own strength?
Now, let’s speak to the relationship itself. You mention that you and this person broke up, yet they remain in your life. We must ask—what is the nature of this relationship? If this is a romantic connection outside of marriage, the Bible is clear that our hearts and bodies are to be kept pure, set apart for a future spouse in godly marriage. **1 Corinthians 6:18-20 (WEB)** warns, *“Flee sexual immorality! ‘Every sin that a man does is outside the body,’ but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body. Or don’t you know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. Therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God’s.”* If there is any physical or emotional intimacy outside of marriage, this is sin, and it will cloud your discernment. The Lord may be withholding clarity until you fully surrender this area to Him.
If this person is not a believer, **2 Corinthians 6:14 (WEB)** is clear: *“Don’t be unequally yoked with unbelievers, for what fellowship have righteousness and iniquity? Or what communion has light with darkness?”* A relationship with an unbeliever will only lead to heartache and compromise. If this is the case, the Lord may be protecting you by not removing this person immediately—He may be giving you time to fully let go and trust Him with your future.
Alternatively, if this person *is* a believer, have you sought godly counsel about reconciliation with the goal of marriage? Or are you holding onto a relationship that is not moving toward covenant? **1 Corinthians 7:39 (WEB)** says a widow (or single person) is free to marry *“only in the Lord.”* If this relationship is not honoring God, it is better to release it entirely than to cling to something that distracts you from His best.
The fact that this person is still in your life may be a test of your surrender. The Lord often leaves open doors in our lives to see if we will choose Him above our own desires. **Proverbs 3:5-6 (WEB)** says, *“Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and don’t lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.”* Have you fully surrendered this relationship to Him? Or are you still holding onto it in your heart?
Let us pray for you now:
*Heavenly Father, we come before You in the mighty name of Jesus, lifting up our sister who is hurting and seeking Your will. Lord, we ask that You would open her eyes to see this situation as You do. If this relationship is not of You, give her the strength to release it completely. Break every ungodly soul tie, every emotional dependency that is not rooted in You. If there has been sin in this relationship, Father, convict her heart and lead her to repentance. Cleanse her, renew her mind, and set her free from any bondage that is keeping her from Your perfect will.*
*If this person is meant to be her spouse, Lord, make it clear. Bring restoration in a way that honors You, with purity, patience, and a commitment to covenant marriage. But if this is not Your plan, Father, remove every trace of longing, every false hope, and fill her with Your peace. Help her to trust You even in the silence. Give her a heart that seeks You above all else, knowing that Your plans for her are good.*
*We rebuke the enemy’s lies that she will never be loved, that her future is hopeless, or that she must settle for less than Your best. Father, surround her with godly community, with wisdom, and with Your Word to guide her. Let her find her satisfaction in You alone. In Jesus’ powerful name, we pray. Amen.*
We urge you to examine your heart before the Lord. Are you willing to let go if He says no? Are you praying in Jesus’ name, with a heart fully submitted to His will? The Lord is faithful, and He will not withhold good from those who walk uprightly (Psalm 84:11). But we must seek *Him* first, not just answers. Spend time in His Word, in worship, and in prayer—not just about this person, but about your own relationship with Christ. His love is the only love that will never fail you.
If you need to repent of anything in this relationship, do so now. If you need to set boundaries, ask the Lord for wisdom. And if you need to let go, trust that He has someone far better for you—or that He *is* enough for you, even if marriage never comes. His plans are perfect. Will you trust Him?