We grieve with you over the brokenness of this sin, but we also rejoice that your heart is turning toward repentance, for God is faithful to forgive and restore those who come to Him with a contrite spirit. The Scriptures are clear that adultery is a grievous sin against God, your spouse, and even against your own body (1 Corinthians 6:18). Yet there is hope, for as it is written, *"If we confess our sins, he is faithful and righteous to forgive us the sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness."* (1 John 1:9, WEB). Your desire to end this sin and walk in honesty is evidence of the Holy Spirit’s conviction, and we urge you to act swiftly and decisively.
You must cut off all contact with this woman immediately—not in anger or self-righteousness, but in humility and love for truth. *"Can a man scoop fire into his lap, and his clothes not be burned? So is he who goes in to his neighbor’s wife. Whoever does so will not go unpunished."* (Proverbs 6:27, 29, WEB). The longer this continues, the deeper the wounds will be for everyone involved. You must also confess to your spouse, for secrecy is the enemy of healing. Though the truth may bring pain, it is the only path to true repentance and restoration. *"He who conceals his sins doesn’t prosper, but whoever confesses and renounces them finds mercy."* (Proverbs 28:13, WEB). Trust that God will give you the words and the grace to do this in a way that honors Him, even if the consequences are difficult.
As for the woman involved, we pray that God would open her eyes to the truth of this situation and guard her heart from further attachment to you. May He lead her to a godly man who will cherish her in purity and truth, for *"marriage is honorable in all, and the bed is undefiled; but God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterers."* (Hebrews 13:4, WEB). Your prayer for her well-being is commendable, but you must also recognize that your actions have harmed her, even unintentionally. True love for her now means removing yourself entirely from her life so she can heal and seek God’s will without confusion.
We also urge you to examine your heart and marriage. Where did the cracks begin? Were there unmet needs, unrepentant sins, or a lack of spiritual intimacy with your spouse that made you vulnerable to this temptation? *"Watch and pray, that you don’t enter into temptation. The spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak."* (Matthew 26:41, WEB). You must seek counseling—both individually and with your spouse—to rebuild trust and establish safeguards against future sin. This will require humility, patience, and a willingness to endure the hard work of restoration.
Most importantly, you must cling to Christ, for apart from Him, you cannot overcome this. *"I can do all things through Christ, who strengthens me."* (Philippians 4:13, WEB). Your identity is not in your failure but in His redemption. Let this be a turning point where you surrender fully to Him, allowing His grace to transform you into a man of integrity.
Now, let us pray together:
Heavenly Father, we come before You with broken hearts, lifting up our brother who has stumbled into grievous sin. Lord, we thank You that he is turning to You in repentance, and we ask for Your mercy to wash over him. Cleanse him, O God, from all unrighteousness and create in him a clean heart (Psalm 51:10). Give him the courage to end this adulterous relationship completely and to confess the truth to his wife, trusting in Your strength to sustain him through the consequences. Father, we pray for his wife—prepare her heart to receive this painful news, and surround her with Your comfort and support. May she see Your hand at work even in this valley.
Lord, we also lift up the woman involved. Remove any romantic feelings she has for him, and protect her heart from further pain. Lead her to a godly man who will love her as Christ loves the Church—purely, selflessly, and faithfully. Bring healing to her soul and clarity to her mind, that she may seek Your will above all else.
Father, we ask that You restore this marriage if it is Your will. Soften both hearts toward one another and toward You. Raise up godly counselors to guide them through this process, and give them the humility to submit to Your correction. Let this be a testimony of Your redeeming power, that what the enemy meant for destruction, You will use for Your glory.
We rebuke the spirit of deception and infidelity that has taken hold, and we declare that no weapon formed against this marriage will prosper (Isaiah 54:17). Fill our brother with Your Holy Spirit, that he may walk in victory over temptation and become a man after Your own heart. Remind him daily of Your love and forgiveness, that he may not be paralyzed by shame but empowered by Your grace.
In the mighty name of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior, we pray. Amen.
