We hear your cry for peace and clarity in this season of emotional turmoil, and we join you in lifting this burden before the Lord. Anxiety is a heavy weight, but we know that God does not intend for you to carry it alone. The Scriptures remind us, *"Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you"* (1 Peter 5:7). His peace is not the absence of chaos but the presence of Christ in the midst of it. We pray that you would feel His nearness, that the Holy Spirit would quiet the storm within you, and that you would rest in the truth that God is sovereign over every detail of your life—including this breakup and the uncertainty about the future.
The pain of a broken relationship is real, and it’s natural to feel confused when emotions are raw. But we encourage you to fix your eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of your faith (Hebrews 12:2). He is the only one who can bring true healing and perspective. While it’s good that you’re praying for your ex and his spiritual growth, we must gently remind you that your first priority is your own relationship with God. It’s easy to become entangled in someone else’s journey, especially when you see signs of change, but you cannot carry his burdens for him. The Lord is working in his heart, just as He is working in yours. Trust that God’s timing and His ways are perfect, even when they don’t align with your desires or expectations.
We are encouraged to hear that your ex is drawing closer to God, but we must address some concerns with honesty and love. The fact that he struggles with lust and has only recently begun to turn from weed and other habits is a red flag that cannot be ignored. While we celebrate any step toward repentance, true transformation is a process, and it’s dangerous to assume that a few months of change erase a pattern of sin. The Bible warns us, *"Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?"* (2 Corinthians 6:14). Even if he professes faith now, his past and present struggles with lust and addiction raise serious questions about whether he is truly prepared to lead a godly marriage. Lust is not a minor issue—it is a sin that wars against the soul (1 Peter 2:11), and it can destroy marriages if not fully surrendered to Christ.
We must also rebuke the idea that you are unsure if he is "the one." The world’s concept of "the one" is not biblical. Marriage is not about finding a perfect person but about two imperfect people committing to love and serve God together. The real question is not whether he is "the one" but whether he is a man of God who is fully submitted to Christ, walking in repentance, and ready to lead a wife in holiness. Right now, his struggles with lust and his recent history of unbelief suggest that he is not there yet. We urge you to guard your heart (Proverbs 4:23) and not entertain the idea of reconciliation until you see *fruit in keeping with repentance* (Matthew 3:8)—not just words or temporary change, but a deep, lasting transformation that only the Holy Spirit can bring.
We also want to address the sexual immorality that likely took place in your relationship. If you were physically intimate outside of marriage, that was fornication—a sin that God takes seriously. The Bible says, *"Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body"* (1 Corinthians 6:18). We encourage you to repent of any sexual sin and ask God for forgiveness. He is faithful and just to cleanse you from all unrighteousness (1 John 1:9). This is not to shame you but to free you, because sin—even when we don’t realize it—can create bondage, and bondage fuels anxiety. True peace comes when we walk in obedience to God’s Word.
Let us pray for you now:
Heavenly Father, we come before You with heavy hearts, lifting up our sister who is struggling with anxiety, confusion, and the pain of a broken relationship. Lord, You see every tear, every fear, and every doubt that she carries. We ask that You would wrap Your arms around her and fill her with Your perfect peace—the peace that surpasses all understanding (Philippians 4:7). Calm her mind, steady her heart, and remind her that You are her refuge and strength (Psalm 46:1). Help her to trust in Your plan, even when it feels uncertain, and to find her identity and security in You alone.
Father, we pray for her ex as well. We thank You for the work You are doing in his life, but we ask that You would continue to convict him of sin and draw him into deeper repentance. Lord, if he is to be a godly husband one day, we pray that You would refine him, break the chains of lust and addiction, and teach him to walk in purity and holiness. Give him a hunger for Your Word and a heart that seeks You above all else. But Lord, we also ask that You would protect our sister from any premature attachment or false hope. Guard her heart from deception and help her to wait on Your timing, not her own.
We repent on behalf of any sexual sin that may have taken place in this relationship. Forgive us, Lord, and cleanse us from all unrighteousness. Heal any wounds caused by sin and restore innocence where it has been lost. Help our sister to walk in purity moving forward, and give her the strength to flee temptation.
Lord, we ask that You would give her clarity—clarity about this relationship, clarity about Your will for her life, and clarity about the steps she needs to take. Surround her with godly counsel and wise believers who can speak truth into her life. Help her to seek You first in all things, knowing that when she does, everything else will fall into place (Matthew 6:33).
We declare that anxiety has no place in her life because You have not given her a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and a sound mind (2 Timothy 1:7). We rebuke the lies of the enemy that tell her she is alone, that she will never be loved, or that she must settle for less than Your best. We speak life, hope, and healing over her in Jesus’ name.
Thank You, Lord, for Your faithfulness. Thank You that You are close to the brokenhearted and save those who are crushed in spirit (Psalm 34:18). We trust You to complete the good work You have begun in her life. In Jesus’ mighty name we pray, Amen.
In the days ahead, we encourage you to immerse yourself in God’s Word. Meditate on Scriptures that speak of His peace, His faithfulness, and His promises. Spend time in worship, not just as something you do with someone else, but as a personal act of surrender to God. Seek out a biblical community—a church or small group—where you can be encouraged and held accountable. And most importantly, wait on the Lord. Do not rush into another relationship out of loneliness or fear. God’s best for you is worth the wait.
If you feel led, consider fasting and praying for clarity about this relationship. Ask God to show you whether this man is truly walking in repentance or if he is still in a season of spiritual infancy. And remember, even if he never changes, your hope is not in him but in Christ. He is your provider, your protector, and your peace. Fix your eyes on Him, and He will direct your path (Proverbs 3:5-6).
