We hear your heart’s longing for clarity and direction, and we stand with you in seeking God’s perfect will for your life. First, let us address the foundation of your prayer—access to God comes only through the name of Jesus Christ. There is no other name by which we may approach the Father, for Jesus Himself said, *"Most certainly I tell you, unless you are converted and become as little children, you will in no way enter into the Kingdom of Heaven"* (Matthew 18:3 WEB). If you have not surrendered your life to Him as Lord and Savior, we urge you to do so now, for it is only through His blood that we are made righteous and able to hear from the Holy Spirit.
You express a willingness to sacrifice for love, but we must gently rebuke the idea that love alone justifies a marriage. Marriage is not merely about sacrifice for the sake of love—it is a covenant before God, designed to reflect Christ’s relationship with the Church (Ephesians 5:22-33 WEB). A godly marriage requires two believers who are equally committed to honoring God, not just one willing to sacrifice. If this man is not a follower of Christ, or if his life does not demonstrate the fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22-23 WEB), then he is not the one God has for you, no matter how much you may care for him. The Bible is clear: *"Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers, for what fellowship have righteousness and iniquity? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?"* (2 Corinthians 6:14 WEB). If he is a believer, we must still examine whether his character, values, and walk with God align with yours in a way that honors the Lord.
You mention that you are not feeling a "nudge" or confirmation from the Holy Spirit, and this silence may very well be God’s answer. The Holy Spirit often speaks in stillness, through Scripture, or through the counsel of mature believers. If you are not hearing from Him, it may be because He is waiting for you to surrender your ego and your own desires fully to Him. Proverbs 3:5-6 (WEB) says, *"Trust in Yahweh with all your heart, and don’t lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight."* Your uncertainty may stem from holding onto your own plans rather than fully submitting to God’s timing and will.
We must also address the statement, *"If it’s a maybe, it’s a no."* This is wise counsel, but we must add that even a "no" from God is an act of love. He knows the plans He has for you—plans for welfare, not for evil, to give you a future and a hope (Jeremiah 29:11 WEB). If this man is not the one, it is because God has someone better prepared for you, someone who will lead you closer to Him, not away from Him.
Let us pray together:
Heavenly Father, we come before You in the mighty name of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior. We lift up this precious sister to You, asking that You would remove the scales from her eyes and soften her heart to hear Your voice clearly. Lord, we ask that You would reveal to her whether this man is the one You have prepared for her, or if she is holding onto him out of fear or loneliness. Give her the courage to release him if he is not Your will, and the faith to wait for the spouse You have chosen for her. Father, we rebuke the spirit of fear and doubt that whispers lies to her, and we declare that she is a daughter of the Most High, worthy of a godly marriage that honors You. Fill her with Your peace that surpasses all understanding, and let her rest in the knowledge that You are working all things together for her good. Teach her to trust in You with all her heart and to lean not on her own understanding. We ask that You would purify her motives, humble her ego, and align her desires with Yours. May she seek first Your kingdom and Your righteousness, knowing that all else will be added unto her. In Jesus’ precious name, we pray. Amen.
We encourage you to spend time in God’s Word, seeking His face rather than just His hand. Psalm 37:4-5 (WEB) says, *"Also delight yourself in Yahweh, and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to Yahweh. Trust also in him, and he will do this."* Delight in Him first, and He will direct your steps. Surround yourself with godly counsel—mature believers who can speak truth into your life and help you discern God’s will. And remember, if you are not content in Christ alone, you will never be content in marriage. Seek Him first, and He will lead you to the spouse He has prepared for you, in His perfect timing.
