Dear one , keep praying and stay focused on the Lord , you only need to listen and obey Jesus , this is confusing you by being between being a Christian and a Catholic . Going to mass will not save you , confessing to a priest will not save you , he can do nothing to forgive you , only Jesus can do that , saying the rossary will not save you , nor does it impress God . Mary although she was chosen to give birth to Jesus is NOT who you should even be thinking about , you do not need a go between to talk to the Lord , Jesus has already done this for you when He died on the cross . The enemy of your soul { satan } is distracting you with these thoughts you are having while trying to pray , he wants to keep you from talking to the Lord . Let me suggest that you get alone with the Lord with no distractions and listen to some praise and worship music , begin to praise the Lord for all He has done for you , the bible tells us that He inhabits the praises of His people , when we worship the Lord , His presence surrounds us and things change within us , joy replaces depression , fear and worry have to leave in His Holy presence . Do not give up in praying because if you do the enemy has you where he wants you . Blessings !