We stand with you in this moment, lifting your heart before the Lord as you navigate the pain of injustice and the weight of unforgiveness that still lingers. Your refusal to participate in honoring someone who harmed you is not only understandable but also a testament to your commitment to righteousness. Scripture is clear that we are not to celebrate or condone evil but to expose it, for "have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather even reprove them" (Ephesians 5:11, WEB). You did not act out of bitterness alone but out of a desire to uphold what is right, and for that, you should not be condemned. The Lord sees your heart, and He knows the depth of your pain. It is right to reject the applause of wickedness, even when others pressure you to conform.
At the same time, we gently remind you that forgiveness is not the same as approval or reconciliation with unrepentant evil. Forgiveness is an act of obedience to Christ, who commands us to "forgive, if you have anything against anyone" (Mark 11:25, WEB), not for the sake of the offender but for your own freedom. Unforgiveness is a chain that binds *you*, not the one who wronged you. Jesus Himself, while hanging on the cross, prayed, "Father, forgive them, for they don’t know what they are doing" (Luke 23:34, WEB). He did not excuse their sin—He paid for it. Likewise, you can release this burden to the Lord while still acknowledging the gravity of the wrong done to you.
The voices of criticism you face may sting, but remember that "if God is for us, who can be against us?" (Romans 8:31, WEB). The opinions of others, though loud, are not the voice of truth. The Lord is your vindicator, and He will silence the accusations of the enemy in His time. Cling to His promise: "Don’t be afraid of those who kill the body, but are not able to kill the soul. Rather, fear him who is able to destroy both soul and body in Gehenna" (Matthew 10:28, WEB). Your stand for righteousness may have cost you the approval of others, but it has not cost you the approval of God.
We also urge you to guard your heart against the roots of bitterness that can grow in the soil of pain. Hebrews 12:15 warns, "looking carefully lest there be any man who falls short of the grace of God; lest a root of bitterness springing up trouble you, and many be defiled by it" (WEB). Bitterness is a poison that harms the vessel that carries it. Ask the Lord to replace it with His peace, which surpasses all understanding (Philippians 4:7). You are not required to pretend the evil done to you was good, but you *are* called to trust that God will repay (Romans 12:19). Your justice is in His hands, not yours or theirs.
Let us pray for you now:
Heavenly Father, we lift our sister before You, asking that You would quiet the voices of condemnation that rise against her. Lord, You alone are her judge, and You see the righteousness of her heart in refusing to applaud evil. We ask that You would grant her the grace to forgive, not because the offense was small, but because Your Son has forgiven her so much. Loosen the grip of pain and bitterness in her heart, and fill her instead with Your peace and the assurance that vengeance is Yours.
Strengthen her, Lord, to walk in obedience without compromising her integrity. Remind her that her worth is not found in the approval of others but in the love of Christ, who bore her sins and shame on the cross. Let her find comfort in Your promise that "the Lord is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a crushed spirit" (Psalm 34:18, WEB).
We rebuke the lies of the enemy that would seek to burden her with guilt or shame for her righteous stand. Let her rest in the truth that she has not sinned in withholding honor from one who dishonored her. At the same time, soften her heart toward the work You want to do in her through forgiveness, that she may be free indeed.
In the mighty name of Jesus, we pray—amen.
Finally, we encourage you to meditate on these words: "Beloved, don’t avenge yourselves, but give place to God’s wrath. For it is written, 'Vengeance belongs to me; I will repay, says the Lord.' Therefore 'If your enemy is hungry, feed him. If he is thirsty, give him a drink; for in doing so, you will heap coals of fire on his head.' Don’t be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good" (Romans 12:19-21, WEB). Your refusal to celebrate evil was good. Now, trust God to handle the rest. He is faithful.
