Barbara Barbett
Prayer Partner
It haS BEEN A WHILE SINCE i HAVE SPOKEN TO YOU AND BELIEVE ME WHEN i SAY I AM THANKFUL.
BUT THINGS HAVE NOT CHANGED MUCH AND THE PAIN HAS TURNED INTO BITTERNESS ANGER HARD HEART AND THINGS I NEVER WANTED TO HAPPEN I KNOW THE BIBLE TELLS US THERE IS NO ONE GOOD NO NOT ONE AND I WHOLE HEARTED BELIEVE THAT.
THE VERY LAST THING THAT I THINK HAS JUST FINALLY TOLD ME TO JUST GIVE UP WAS MY DAUGHTER THAT IS THE ONE THAT LIVES HERE IN FLORIDA AND THAT HAS HURT ME THE MOST I ALLOWED TO MOVE IN WITH ME AND SHE WAS TO PAY ME 100 DOLLARS A WEEK I WENT AND GOT HER A CAR IN MY NAME ON MY CREDIT AND SHE WAS TO MAKE PAYMENTS BECAUSE MY FINANCIAL SITUATION HAS NOT CHANGED SINCE I SEEN YOU WELL SHE DECIDED NOT TO MAKE CAR PAYMENT AND THE CAR WENT BACK WHICH JUST SHOT MY CREDIT AND THEN EVERY YEAR GOD HAS A WAY OF SHOWING ME A FAMILY THAT COULD USE HELP DURING THE HOLIDAYS AND THIS TIME HE SHOWED ME A COMMUNITY LONG STORY SHORT SHE GOT UP ONE MORNING FINDING ME TO WRAP PRESENTS FOR THE KIDS THAT ANGERED HER ASKING WHY I WAS SPENDING MY TIME DOING THIS. WE WENT TO NORTH CAROLINA TO SEE MY OTHER DAUGHTER WHILE WE ALSO TOOK HER SOME STUFF THAT SHE COULD USE AND MY SON IN LAW WHO IS MARRIED BUT SEPARATED FROM THE DAUGHTER THAT LIVES WITH ME HAD GONE TO HELP WITH FURNITURE WHILE THERE DECIDED HE WANTED TO SCREAM IN MY FACE 3 DIFFERENT TIMES IN FRONT OF ALL 5 OF MY GRANDBABIES WHAT SHOULD HAVE BEEN A GOOD TIME TURNED UGLY SO I TOLD MY DAUGHTER THAT I DIDNT WANT TO BE PUT IN THAT PREDICAMENT ANY MORE SEEING THIS WASNT THE FIRST TIME THIS HAS HAPPEN SO I DIDNT WANT HIM BACK AT MY HOUSE. AND THEN MY DAUGHTER TOLD ME NOT DURING THIS EVENT BUT DURING THE EVENT OF CHRISTMAS WRAPPING SHE WOULD NO LONGER PAY ME RENT THAT IF I WANTED HER OUT I COULD EVICT HER I EXPLAIN THAT I CANT AFFORD FOR HER TO LIVE HERE FREE SHE DIDNT CARE THE TWO GRANDBABIES AFTER THE TRIP TO NORTH CAROLINA DECIDED TO BECOME VERY DISRESTFUL TO ME ALSO AT CHRISTMAS SHE DECIDED THAT MY GRANDSONS WOULD NOT BE OPENING THE GIFTS I HAD GOTTEN THEM SO HARD FOR ME TO HAVE MY 5 YEAR OLD GRANDSON ASK IF HE COULD OPEN HIS GIFTS AND HIS MOM SAY NO THIS HAPPEN FOR THREE DAYS
BUT I FEEL LIKE IF I DONT ALLOW MY DAUGHTER TO TREAT ME LIKE LESS OF A PERSON THEN I AM SHE WILL NOT ALLOW ME TO SEE MY GRANDSONS AND THE PAIN OF ALLL OF THIS IS JUST MORE THEN I CAN BEAR SO TO GET PAST THIS WHICH REALLY HASNT HELPED I HAVE BECOME BITTER I HAVE GOTTEN A I DONT CARE ATTITUDE BUT IN ALL REALITY I DO CARE I HAVE PRAYED ABOUT IT AND FEEL AS THOUGH GOD IS LEAVING ME TO MY OWN
I just dont know how to do this any more I am tired
BUT THINGS HAVE NOT CHANGED MUCH AND THE PAIN HAS TURNED INTO BITTERNESS ANGER HARD HEART AND THINGS I NEVER WANTED TO HAPPEN I KNOW THE BIBLE TELLS US THERE IS NO ONE GOOD NO NOT ONE AND I WHOLE HEARTED BELIEVE THAT.
THE VERY LAST THING THAT I THINK HAS JUST FINALLY TOLD ME TO JUST GIVE UP WAS MY DAUGHTER THAT IS THE ONE THAT LIVES HERE IN FLORIDA AND THAT HAS HURT ME THE MOST I ALLOWED TO MOVE IN WITH ME AND SHE WAS TO PAY ME 100 DOLLARS A WEEK I WENT AND GOT HER A CAR IN MY NAME ON MY CREDIT AND SHE WAS TO MAKE PAYMENTS BECAUSE MY FINANCIAL SITUATION HAS NOT CHANGED SINCE I SEEN YOU WELL SHE DECIDED NOT TO MAKE CAR PAYMENT AND THE CAR WENT BACK WHICH JUST SHOT MY CREDIT AND THEN EVERY YEAR GOD HAS A WAY OF SHOWING ME A FAMILY THAT COULD USE HELP DURING THE HOLIDAYS AND THIS TIME HE SHOWED ME A COMMUNITY LONG STORY SHORT SHE GOT UP ONE MORNING FINDING ME TO WRAP PRESENTS FOR THE KIDS THAT ANGERED HER ASKING WHY I WAS SPENDING MY TIME DOING THIS. WE WENT TO NORTH CAROLINA TO SEE MY OTHER DAUGHTER WHILE WE ALSO TOOK HER SOME STUFF THAT SHE COULD USE AND MY SON IN LAW WHO IS MARRIED BUT SEPARATED FROM THE DAUGHTER THAT LIVES WITH ME HAD GONE TO HELP WITH FURNITURE WHILE THERE DECIDED HE WANTED TO SCREAM IN MY FACE 3 DIFFERENT TIMES IN FRONT OF ALL 5 OF MY GRANDBABIES WHAT SHOULD HAVE BEEN A GOOD TIME TURNED UGLY SO I TOLD MY DAUGHTER THAT I DIDNT WANT TO BE PUT IN THAT PREDICAMENT ANY MORE SEEING THIS WASNT THE FIRST TIME THIS HAS HAPPEN SO I DIDNT WANT HIM BACK AT MY HOUSE. AND THEN MY DAUGHTER TOLD ME NOT DURING THIS EVENT BUT DURING THE EVENT OF CHRISTMAS WRAPPING SHE WOULD NO LONGER PAY ME RENT THAT IF I WANTED HER OUT I COULD EVICT HER I EXPLAIN THAT I CANT AFFORD FOR HER TO LIVE HERE FREE SHE DIDNT CARE THE TWO GRANDBABIES AFTER THE TRIP TO NORTH CAROLINA DECIDED TO BECOME VERY DISRESTFUL TO ME ALSO AT CHRISTMAS SHE DECIDED THAT MY GRANDSONS WOULD NOT BE OPENING THE GIFTS I HAD GOTTEN THEM SO HARD FOR ME TO HAVE MY 5 YEAR OLD GRANDSON ASK IF HE COULD OPEN HIS GIFTS AND HIS MOM SAY NO THIS HAPPEN FOR THREE DAYS
BUT I FEEL LIKE IF I DONT ALLOW MY DAUGHTER TO TREAT ME LIKE LESS OF A PERSON THEN I AM SHE WILL NOT ALLOW ME TO SEE MY GRANDSONS AND THE PAIN OF ALLL OF THIS IS JUST MORE THEN I CAN BEAR SO TO GET PAST THIS WHICH REALLY HASNT HELPED I HAVE BECOME BITTER I HAVE GOTTEN A I DONT CARE ATTITUDE BUT IN ALL REALITY I DO CARE I HAVE PRAYED ABOUT IT AND FEEL AS THOUGH GOD IS LEAVING ME TO MY OWN
I just dont know how to do this any more I am tired
