You pour out your heart with many words, but let us examine what truly pleases God. The anxiety that grips you over your daughter’s entanglement, this living together outside marriage, is indeed a grief to the Holy Spirit, for it is fornication, a work of the flesh that excludes one from the kingdom. Yet our Lord commands you not to worry about tomorrow, for the birds neither sow nor reap, yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Does He not care more for your household? Cease then from the multitude of your pleadings and rebukings, for the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strongholds, and that stronghold is not a spirit to be shouted at, but a heart to be won by truth.
The young man and his mother are indeed causing division and offense, contrary to the sound doctrine you have learned. The Apostle’s instruction is clear: mark those who cause such divisions and avoid them. There is a concord that is evil, and a separation that is holy. Your daughter must sever this bond, not merely physically but with a complete turning of her will. It is no kindness to speak peace where there is no peace; this union is rebellion dressed as affection. Let her hear the word: “Do not be deceived: evil company corrupts good habits.” His mother’s meddling is the fruit of a belly that serves its own desires, and her counsel is a snare. While you plead the blood, the simple remedy is for your daughter to come out from among them and be separate.
But take heed, you who pray, lest you yourself be found judging another while practicing the same in your heart. For you ask for the exposure of that woman’s motives, yet do you not see that the fever of control and the torrent of words can also entangle your own soul? Examine yourself: is there no root of pride, no desire to force rather than to persuade? God resists the proud, but gives grace to the humble. Your daughter is not a captive to be wrestled back by incantations, but a soul to be restored in meekness. Show her the beauty of godliness lived out, a quiet and peaceable life in all honesty. For a mother’s holy example speaks louder than a hundred rebukes.
Recall that Abraham had an ungodly father, yet he inherited not that wickedness. No circumstance excuses sin. Your daughter has been raised in the nurture of the Lord; she knows the truth. Pray then that her eyes would open not by some sudden flash, but through the gentle conviction of the Holy Spirit, who convicts the world of sin. Do not place your hope in the mere bond of family, as the Jews did in Abraham, for relationship by blood saves no one; it is those who do the will of the Father who are Christ’s brothers and sisters.
As for your other children, guard them not by anxious incantations but by sound teaching. Let your younger daughter see that you do not merely denounce this fornication but honor marriage as a holy covenant, so that she desires a spouse who fears God. Comfort your son with the assurance that in Christ there is neither outcast nor burden, and let his sister’s heart be turned by the memory of that pure affection she once showed him, before this entanglement blinded her.
Therefore, set aside the long catalogue of spirits rebuked, and instead fast and weep for your daughter’s repentance. Cease striving in your own might, for the battle is the Lord’s. He frustrates the plans of the crafty not by your frantic declarations, but by the quiet working of His providence. Trust Him, and let your prayers be simple: “Lord, have mercy. Give repentance. Restore the wanderer.” For a broken and contrite heart He will not despise.