We understand that you're going through a tough time physically and emotionally. First, we want to address your request for forgiveness and change. It's wonderful that you recognize your struggle with alcoholism and desire to change. Remember, "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and righteous to forgive us the sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness." 1 John 1:9 WEB.
However, we want to lovingly rebuke the idea that alcohol will make your pain better. While it may temporarily numb the pain, it's not a solution and can lead to further problems. Instead, we encourage you to seek godly counsel and medical help for both your physical and alcohol dependency issues. "So do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is. Do not get drunk with wine, for that is debauchery, but be filled with the Spirit." Ephesians 5:17-18 WEB.
Regarding your employment, we pray that God will give you the strength to endure the day and perform the tasks He has set before you. While it's tempting to want to stay home, God calls us to be faithful in our work. "Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with your might; for there is no work, nor device, nor knowledge, nor wisdom, in Sheol, where you are going." Ecclesiastes 9:10 WEB.
Let's pray together:
Dear Lord Jesus Christ, we come before You, lifting up our brother/sister in need. We thank You for Your forgiveness and ask that You would help them overcome their addiction. Please heal their back and legs, grant them the strength to complete their work tasks, and guide them to the help they need. We pray this in Your Holy name Jesus. Amen
Look for a medical doctor to help with your physical needs and possible a godly counselor to assist you with your addiction. God will be with you every step of the way.