Church and pastor

Dhitlor

Servant of All
Please pray for me about the church my mother and I recently joined as the pastor of the church does not seem to like me at all. My mother and I attended this church for a year before joining and I have had plenty of time to be certain of this. He's done everything to me from insulting me in his sermons from the pulpit to being mean when I interact with him personally. I now no longer feel comfortable going to him for advice or any problems I may have in my Christian walk. I'd prefer to talk to someone else in the church about those things. And there's nothing wrong with doing that but I think that if one cannot go to the pastor of a church for help, if that option is not available to them, that is very concerning. I really love this church and I want to keep going here but this is something that is a problem for me and I'm worried about my mental health being affected because every time I interact with him, I have to deal with thinly veiled jabs against me. I don't know if my mother notices it. He doesn't seem to have a problem with my mom. I fear that my mental health may already be being affected. This is the millionth bad experience I've had with a pastor in a church. I've not had a single positive experience with any. I guess I could argue that some of these churches were false churches so whether these pastors were legitimate pastors or not is up for questioning but, still, I've had nothing but bad experiences with them. They never ever seem to like me even if I've not even done anything to them or barely know them. And I always have so many questions about my faith. I love learning as a Christian. I love listening to sermons. So to have never had a positive experience with a pastor ever hurts.
 
I prayed that God in Jesus' name will answer your prayer request according to God's perfect love, wisdom, will, timing, grace, and mercy. God Loves You. Thank You Jesus!!!

Psalm 37:4: Delight yourself in the Lord, And He shall give you the desires of your heart.
Matthew 6:33: But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.


🙏Prayer Focus: God, Thank You for loving me. God, I ask You in Jesus’ name please bless me with everything that I stand in need of and everything You want me to have. God bless me to prosper, walk in excellent health, and never stop growing in the love, grace, and knowledge of Christ Jesus. God bless me to know You in truth, fall in love with You with all my heart, mind, soul, body, and strength and never fall out of love with You. Bless me to have an ever growing closer stronger, more intimate relationship with You. Bless me with the love, desire, strength, and the spirit of obedience to always delight myself in You, seek first Your kingdom, Your righteousness, and to always respect and obey You. Bless me to trust You with all my heart, acknowledge You in all my ways, and lean not to my own understanding.

God heal me in every area of my life. Deliver and cleanse me of everything in my life that doesn't honor You. Transform and renew my mind. Bless me with love, power, and a sound mind. Let the mind that is in Christ Jesus be in me. Bless me to have and operate with a God solution focused heart, mind, spirit, and attitude. Bless me to have a God Kingdom Culture Mentality. God be with me as a mighty warrior. Let no weapon formed against me prosper. Protect me from all the plans of my enemies and the plans of the enemy of my soul. God, all that I have asked of You, in this prayer, please do the same for the writer of the prayer, all those who love and care about me, and all those I love and care about. God, please forever honor this prayer over each of our lives. God Thank You. Amen, so be it by faith, and by faith, it is so
. Prayer written by The Encourager-Prayer Warrior-Board Certified Professional Christian Life Coach. www.theencourager.net

Healed Spirit Soul And Body

 
We grieve with you over the pain and rejection you’ve experienced, especially from those who should be shepherding God’s flock with love and care. The behavior you’ve described from this pastor is deeply concerning and does not reflect the heart of Christ, who calls His leaders to serve with humility, patience, and kindness. Let us first address the biblical role of a pastor, for Scripture is clear about how those in spiritual authority are to conduct themselves.

The apostle Peter instructs elders: *"Shepherd the flock of God which is among you, exercising the oversight, not under compulsion, but voluntarily; not for dishonest gain, but willingly; neither as lording it over those entrusted to you, but making yourselves examples to the flock"* (1 Peter 5:2-3, WEB). A pastor is to be a source of encouragement, wisdom, and protection—not a source of insults, hostility, or favoritism. Jesus Himself warned against leaders who misuse their authority: *"But Jesus called them to himself, and said, ‘You know that the rulers of the nations lord it over them, and their great ones exercise authority over them. It shall not be so among you, but whoever desires to become great among you shall be your servant. Whoever desires to be first among you shall be your bondservant, even as the Son of Man came not to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many’"* (Matthew 20:25-28, WEB).

What you’re experiencing is not only hurtful but spiritually dangerous. A pastor who publicly insults members from the pulpit or shows partiality is failing in his God-given duty. This is not a matter of personal preference or style—it is sin. The apostle James warns, *"Don’t be partial, and don’t judge, or you will be judged with the judgment you use. For whatever judgment you judge with will be judged against you"* (James 2:12-13, WEB). If this pastor’s behavior is consistent and targeted, it may also reflect a deeper issue of pride or unrepentant sin in his own heart. We do not say this lightly, for we are called to honor those in authority (1 Timothy 5:17-19), but honor does not mean enabling abuse or turning a blind eye to ungodly behavior.

Your concern about your mental health is valid. Proverbs 12:18 tells us, *"There is one who speaks like the piercings of a sword, but the tongue of the wise promotes healing."* Repeated exposure to harsh, critical, or passive-aggressive treatment can indeed wound the soul. It is not wrong to protect your heart while seeking wisdom on how to proceed. You are right to recognize that avoiding this pastor for spiritual guidance is a natural response—but it is also a red flag about the health of this church. If the shepherd is not trustworthy, the flock will scatter or suffer. This is why Scripture commands that elders must be *"blameless, the husband of one wife, ruling his children and his own house well; not a new convert, lest being puffed up he fall into the same condemnation as the devil. Moreover he must have good testimony from those who are outside, to avoid falling into reproach and the snare of the devil"* (1 Timothy 3:2-7, WEB). A pattern of unkindness, favoritism, or public shaming disqualifies a man from this role if he remains unrepentant.

We also hear the deeper pain in your words: a history of negative experiences with pastors and churches. This breaks our hearts, for the body of Christ is meant to be a refuge, a family where believers are built up in love (Ephesians 4:11-16). It is not normal or acceptable for someone seeking God to repeatedly encounter rejection or hostility from spiritual leaders. This may lead us to ask: Have you ever been able to share your struggles with a mature believer who can walk alongside you? Sometimes, the enemy uses repeated wounds to discourage us from pursuing fellowship altogether, but God’s design is for us to *"not forsake our own assembling together, as the custom of some is, but exhorting one another, and so much the more as you see the Day approaching"* (Hebrews 10:25, WEB).

We must also gently ask: Have you examined whether there might be patterns in your interactions (even unintentionally) that could contribute to these conflicts? This is not to blame you—far from it—but to consider whether there are areas where God might be refining you. For example, do you tend to ask challenging questions that some leaders might perceive as confrontational? Are there expectations you carry (consciously or unconsciously) about how a pastor "should" behave? Again, this is not to excuse the pastor’s sin, but to ensure we are all walking in wisdom and self-awareness. Even so, the burden of reconciliation and godly leadership lies first with the pastor, not with you.

Now, let us pray together for you, this church, and this pastor:

*Heavenly Father, we lift our sister before You, asking for Your comfort and protection over her heart. Lord, You see the wounds she carries from repeated rejection, and You know the depth of her longing for a healthy, Christ-centered church family. We ask that You would heal her from the pain of these experiences and restore her trust in Your body. Give her discernment, Lord, about whether to remain at this church or seek another fellowship where she can grow under godly leadership.

Father, we also pray for this pastor. If there is unrepentant sin in his heart—pride, partiality, or bitterness—we ask that You would convict him deeply. Bring him to repentance, Lord, for the sake of Your name and the flock You’ve entrusted to him. If he is unaware of how his words and actions are affecting others, open his eyes. Raise up godly men and women in that church who will hold him accountable with love and truth. If he refuses to repent, Father, expose his sin and protect Your people from further harm.

Lord, we ask that You would provide our sister with wise counselors—mature believers who can shepherd her, answer her questions, and encourage her in her faith. Surround her with sisters and brothers in Christ who will love her well. If it is Your will for her to remain at this church, give her supernatural strength to endure and a clear path to address these issues biblically. If it is Your will for her to leave, make the way clear and lead her to a church where she can thrive.

Finally, Father, we rebuke the enemy’s lies that would tell her she is unwelcome in Your body or that all pastors are untrustworthy. Remind her that You are her Good Shepherd, and no man’s rejection can separate her from Your love. Fill her with Your peace, which surpasses all understanding, and guard her heart and mind in Christ Jesus. We ask all this in the mighty name of Jesus, our Chief Shepherd and Redeemer. Amen.*

Our encouragement to you is this: Do not lose heart. The fact that you love learning, love sermons, and desire spiritual growth shows that you are seeking God earnestly—and He will not leave you without a place to belong. Consider sharing your concerns with a trusted, mature believer in the church (perhaps an elder or deacon, if they are godly) to see if they can address the pastor’s behavior. If the church leadership is unwilling to address this, it may be time to prayerfully consider finding another church where you can be nourished.

As for your history with pastors, we urge you to bring this pain to Jesus. Ask Him to heal your heart and show you His heart for His church. Not every church is healthy, but there *are* godly pastors and churches where the Word is preached faithfully and love is practiced. Keep seeking, and do not let bitterness take root. *"Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering; for he who promised is faithful. Let us consider how to provoke one another to love and good works"* (Hebrews 10:23-24, WEB).

Lastly, if you have not already, we strongly encourage you to study what Scripture says about the qualifications and roles of pastors (1 Timothy 3, Titus 1, 1 Peter 5). This will help you discern healthy leadership in the future. You are not asking too much to desire a pastor who reflects Christ’s love and wisdom. Keep pursuing God, and trust that He will lead you to a place where you can grow and serve in joy.
 
Dear friend,

We're really sorry to hear about the difficulties you're facing with your pastor. It's never easy when we feel unwelcome or misunderstood in a place where we should feel loved and accepted. We want you to know that we're praying for you, and we hope that our words can bring some comfort and guidance.

Firstly, we want to assure you that it's completely normal to feel hurt and confused when we're treated unfairly, especially by someone in a position of spiritual authority. Jesus himself was betrayed by those closest to him, so we know that this kind of pain is not new. But remember, God is always with you, and he sees the injustice you're facing.

We understand that you're struggling with whether to stay in this church or not. It's a big decision, and we want to encourage you to seek God's will in this matter. Here are a few things we'd like you to consider:

1. **Your mental health is important**: It's crucial to prioritize your well-being. If interacting with this pastor is causing you stress and anxiety, it might be wise to take a step back and consider other options for spiritual guidance.

2. **God has a place for you**: Even if this church isn't the right fit, God has a place for you in his body. Don't lose heart. Keep seeking him, and trust that he will lead you to a place where you can grow and serve in joy.

3. **Pray for wisdom**: Ask God to give you clarity and wisdom in making this decision. Also, consider talking to a trusted, mature believer in the church (maybe an elder or deacon) about your concerns. They might be able to provide some guidance or even speak to the pastor on your behalf.

4. **Learn from the past**: While it's important to forgive and move on, we can also learn from our past experiences. Have you noticed any patterns in your interactions with pastors that might contribute to these conflicts? It's not about blaming yourself, but rather seeking to grow and understand how God might be refining you.

5. **Remember, God is your Good Shepherd**: No matter what happens, God is always with you. His love for you is unchanging, and no man's rejection can separate you from it.

Let's pray together:

"Dear Lord, we come to you today, lifting up our sister before you. We ask for your comfort and protection over her heart. Lord, you see the wounds she carries from repeated rejection, and you know the depth of her longing for a healthy, Christ-centered church family. We ask that you would heal her from the pain of these experiences and restore her trust in your body. Give her discernment, Lord, about whether to remain at this church or seek another fellowship where she can grow under godly leadership.

Father, we also pray for this pastor. If there is unrepentant sin in his heart—pride, partiality, or bitterness—we ask that you would convict him deeply. Bring him to repentance, Lord, for the sake of your name and the flock you've entrusted to him. If he is unaware of how his words and actions are affecting others, open his eyes. Raise up godly men and women in that church who will hold him accountable with love and truth. If he refuses to repent, Father, expose his sin and protect your people from further harm.

Lord, we ask that you would provide our sister with wise counselors—mature believers who can shepherd her, answer her questions, and encourage her in her faith. Surround her with sisters and brothers in Christ who will love her well. If it is your will for her to remain at this church, give her supernatural strength to endure and a clear path to address these issues biblically. If it is your will for her to leave, make the way clear and lead her to a church where she can thrive.

Finally, Father, we rebuke the enemy's lies that would tell her she is unwelcome in your body or that all pastors are untrustworthy. Remind her that you are her Good Shepherd, and no man's rejection can separate her from your love. Fill her with your peace, which surpasses all understanding, and guard her heart and mind in Christ Jesus. We ask all this in the mighty name of Jesus, our Chief Shepherd and Redeemer. Amen."

Please know that you're not alone in this. We're here for you, and we're praying for you. Trust that God is working in your life, even in the midst of these challenges. Keep seeking him, and keep moving forward in faith.

With love and prayers,
[Your Name]
 
Lord, we pray for this prayer and family for blessings healing and salvation. Heal and bless. May their lives be a praise and glory unto thee.
Come to the Lord's holy presence. Seek him with all your heart. Cling to his Word and meditate on it moment by moment by positive thoughts and joy in the heart (James 1:2-4), knowing that the Lord is good and to him be all the praise. Seek first God's kingdom and his righteousness (Matthew 6:33). Even though life may feel hard, the Lord's hand will be on you, and he will answer in his time. I am praying for you. Amen.

Some resources that might help.

Needs: - But my God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19(KJV)

Salvation: - So they said "Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ and you will be saved you and your household." Acts 16:31(NKJV)

Healing: - But He was wounded for our transgressions, He was bruised for our iniquities; The chastisement for our peace was upon Him, And by His stripes we are healed. Isaiah 53:5(NKJV)

Fulfillment by the Holy Spirit: - Then he answered and spake unto me, saying, This is the word of the LORD unto Zerubbabel, saying, Not by might, nor by power, but by my spirit, saith the LORD of hosts. Zechariah 4:6(KJV)

Persecutions: - But I say unto you which hear, Love your enemies, do good to them which hate you, Bless them that curse you, and pray for them which despitefully use you. Luke 6:27-28(KJV)

Help in Prayer

Dwelling and Thriving in God’s grace where everything happens for good (Romans 8:28)

Pray that the Lord may open the eyes of the nations affected by coronavirus (Specifically forces against God’s people)

sermons

Be a Prayer Warrior: “Praying for others”
 
Please pray for me about the church my mother and I recently joined as the pastor of the church does not seem to like me at all. My mother and I attended this church for a year before joining and I have had plenty of time to be certain of this. He's done everything to me from insulting me in his sermons from the pulpit to being mean when I interact with him personally. I now no longer feel comfortable going to him for advice or any problems I may have in my Christian walk. I'd prefer to talk to someone else in the church about those things. And there's nothing wrong with doing that but I think that if one cannot go to the pastor of a church for help, if that option is not available to them, that is very concerning. I really love this church and I want to keep going here but this is something that is a problem for me and I'm worried about my mental health being affected because every time I interact with him, I have to deal with thinly veiled jabs against me. I don't know if my mother notices it. He doesn't seem to have a problem with my mom. I fear that my mental health may already be being affected. This is the millionth bad experience I've had with a pastor in a church. I've not had a single positive experience with any. I guess I could argue that some of these churches were false churches so whether these pastors were legitimate pastors or not is up for questioning but, still, I've had nothing but bad experiences with them. They never ever seem to like me even if I've not even done anything to them or barely know them. And I always have so many questions about my faith. I love learning as a Christian. I love listening to sermons. So to have never had a positive experience with a pastor ever hurts.
I just want to add something I forgot to. Even when my mom and I joined the church and he spoke about us joining as we formally stood in front of the congregation to join, he was making veiled jabs at me. Specifically, he keeps making jabs at me that pretty much refer to me as Satan and question my Christianity. He's even used the idea of Satan attacking me for joining the church to abuse me and cause fear and paranoia and someone else did the same thing too but I'm trying to figure out if this second person only is doing so do to demonic attacks I've been experiencing for the past few years.
 
I just want to add something I forgot to. Even when my mom and I joined the church and he spoke about us joining as we formally stood in front of the congregation to join, he was making veiled jabs at me. Specifically, he keeps making jabs at me that pretty much refer to me as Satan and question my Christianity. He's even used the idea of Satan attacking me for joining the church to abuse me and cause fear and paranoia and someone else did the same thing too but I'm trying to figure out if this second person only is doing so due to demonic attacks I've been experiencing for the past few years.
I also feel like his entire demeanor turns negative from the pulpit when I walk into the room or come in to church.
 

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