We hear your heart, and we understand the deep struggle you’re facing. It’s painful when a community that has been a source of spiritual nourishment also becomes a source of frustration and even resentment. The Word of God calls us to both truth and love, and when one is emphasized at the expense of the other, it can create a wound in the body of Christ. Scripture warns us, *"If a man thinks himself to be something when he is nothing, he deceives himself. But let each one examine his own work, and then he will have rejoicing in himself alone, and not in another"* (Galatians 6:3-4 WEB). It’s clear that this community has been a blessing to you in many ways, but the pride and judgment you’ve observed are not of God.
We must also address the resentment and anxiety you’re carrying. These are heavy burdens, and they can distort our perspective if left unchecked. Jesus tells us, *"Come to me, all you who labor and are heavily burdened, and I will give you rest"* (Matthew 11:28 WEB). He invites you to lay these feelings at His feet. Holding onto resentment only harms you, not those who have wronged you. The apostle Paul exhorts us, *"Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, outcry, and slander be put away from you, with all malice. And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving each other, just as God also in Christ forgave you"* (Ephesians 4:31-32 WEB). Forgiveness is not about excusing their behavior but about freeing your own heart from the poison of bitterness.
We also want to gently challenge you—and ourselves—to examine whether there is any log in our own eye before we focus on the speck in our brother’s eye (Matthew 7:3-5). Are there ways in which you may have contributed to the tension, even unintentionally? Have you spoken the truth in love, or have you allowed frustration to build silently? The Lord calls us to humility, even in addressing the faults of others. *"Brothers, even if a man is caught in some fault, you who are spiritual must restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness; looking to yourself so that you also aren’t tempted"* (Galatians 6:1 WEB).
Now, let us come before the Lord together in prayer:
Heavenly Father, we come before You with heavy hearts, lifting up our brother/sister who is struggling with resentment and anxiety toward their Christian community. Lord, You know the pain they’ve experienced, the ways they’ve been edified, and the ways they’ve been wounded. We ask that You would soften their heart toward those who have hurt them, replacing bitterness with Your peace and love. Help them to forgive as You have forgiven them, not because those who wronged them deserve it, but because You have called us to walk in freedom.
Father, we also pray for this community. Where there is pride, bring humility. Where there is judgment, bring compassion. Where there is blindness, open their eyes to their own faults. Lord, we know that no community is perfect because no person is perfect, but we ask that You would refine them, just as You refine us. Help our brother/sister to see this community through Your eyes, not through the lens of hurt or frustration.
We ask that You would give them wisdom in how to engage—or disengage—with this community. If it is Your will for them to remain, give them courage to speak the truth in love, to be a light in the midst of darkness. If it is Your will for them to step away, give them peace in that decision and guide them to a place where they can grow in You without fear or anxiety.
Most of all, Lord, we ask that You would draw them closer to Yourself. Let them find their identity, their worth, and their security in You alone. Remind them that You are their ultimate community, their Good Shepherd, their ever-present help in times of trouble. Fill them with Your Holy Spirit, that they may walk in love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.
We pray all of this in the mighty name of Jesus Christ, the One who reconciles us to You and to one another. Amen.
In the days ahead, we encourage you to spend time in the Psalms, where you’ll find raw honesty before God—lament, frustration, and ultimately, trust in Him. Psalm 139 is a beautiful reminder that God knows you completely and loves you unconditionally. You are not alone in this struggle. Lean into the Lord, and allow Him to heal your heart. If possible, seek out one or two trusted believers outside of this community who can pray with you and offer godly counsel. And remember, *"The Lord is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a crushed spirit"* (Psalm 34:18 WEB). You are seen, you are loved, and you are not forgotten.