My ex was involved in a cult and gave me books related to that cult while we were together. I read some of one of the books while also letting him know that I didn't agree with it. I have since broken up with him due to us being unequally yoked and now, for certain reasons, he won't speak to me at all. I was going to keep the books in case he ever came back as a friend to try to reason with him about their falsehood (I did try to do this at the end of the relationship) if he was still involved in the cult but I'm unsure I will ever hear from him again. Please pray for my wisdom on whether or not to throw these books out. Thank you.
Books
- Thread starter Dhitlor
- Start date
We thank you for sharing this burden with us and we commend you for ending that courtship when you recognized you were unequally yoked. We see your desire to honor the Lord in this and we want to seek His will together with you in Jesus' name. The Scripture says Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers, for what fellowship have righteousness and iniquity Or what fellowship has light with darkness 2 Corinthians 6:14. Your decision to step away from a relationship that could not lead to a godly marriage between a believing man and woman was obedient and wise, and we encourage you to continue to guard your heart for a future spouse who loves Christ.
We understand your hesitation about the books. Your motive to keep them to try to reason with him if he returns is compassionate, but we believe the safest and most biblical course is to remove them from your home and destroy them. The believers in Ephesus who had practiced magic showed us the pattern when they believed, they brought their books together and burned them in the sight of all Acts 19:19. They did not keep them for reference or for argument, they destroyed them so they would no longer have influence. We are also warned You shall not bring an abomination into your house, and become a devoted thing like it Deuteronomy 7:26 and If anyone comes to you, and does not bring this teaching, do not receive him into your house, and do not welcome him 2 John 1:10. Keeping false teaching in your home can be a snare and can give the enemy a foothold, for our wrestling is not against flesh and blood, but against the principalities, against the powers, against the world's rulers of the darkness of this age Ephesians 6:12. If the Lord does bring your former boyfriend back as a friend and his heart is open, it will not be those cult books that set him free, but the truth of the Word of God and the power of the Holy Spirit. You can reason with him from Scripture itself without needing to preserve error.
We pray for wisdom for you as you ask. If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach and it will be given to him James 1:5. We also take comfort that The Lord will give wisdom, out of his mouth comes knowledge and understanding Proverbs 2:6. Ask the Lord to make your path clear and to give you peace as you act in obedience. Practically, we would encourage you to not simply donate or sell these books where they could deceive someone else, but to destroy them completely, perhaps by burning or shredding and discarding them, and to do so prayerfully.
We noticed your request did not mention the name of Jesus Christ and we gently want to remind you that it is only through Him that we have access to the Father. Jesus said I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father, except through me John 14:6 and There is salvation in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven that is given among men, by which we must be saved Acts 4:12. If you have trusted in Jesus as Lord and Savior, that you believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead and confess Him as Lord, you are saved Romans 10:9. It is in His name alone that we can pray with confidence and be delivered from all deception.
We pray together for you now. Father, we come before You in the mighty name of Jesus Christ and we thank You for this dear one who desires to walk in truth and purity. We ask You to grant her clear wisdom about these books and the courage to remove what does not honor You. Cleanse her home and her heart from any lingering influence of those false teachings and fill her with Your peace and discernment. We pray also for her former boyfriend, that You would open his eyes, deliver him from the cult and from the domain of darkness, and draw him to salvation in Jesus alone. Protect her from spiritual harm and lead her to a godly marriage in Your timing if it is Your will, or to contentment in serving You. Help her to keep Your Word as her counsel and her defense. We ask all this in the name of Jesus Christ our Lord and Savior, amen.
We understand your hesitation about the books. Your motive to keep them to try to reason with him if he returns is compassionate, but we believe the safest and most biblical course is to remove them from your home and destroy them. The believers in Ephesus who had practiced magic showed us the pattern when they believed, they brought their books together and burned them in the sight of all Acts 19:19. They did not keep them for reference or for argument, they destroyed them so they would no longer have influence. We are also warned You shall not bring an abomination into your house, and become a devoted thing like it Deuteronomy 7:26 and If anyone comes to you, and does not bring this teaching, do not receive him into your house, and do not welcome him 2 John 1:10. Keeping false teaching in your home can be a snare and can give the enemy a foothold, for our wrestling is not against flesh and blood, but against the principalities, against the powers, against the world's rulers of the darkness of this age Ephesians 6:12. If the Lord does bring your former boyfriend back as a friend and his heart is open, it will not be those cult books that set him free, but the truth of the Word of God and the power of the Holy Spirit. You can reason with him from Scripture itself without needing to preserve error.
We pray for wisdom for you as you ask. If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach and it will be given to him James 1:5. We also take comfort that The Lord will give wisdom, out of his mouth comes knowledge and understanding Proverbs 2:6. Ask the Lord to make your path clear and to give you peace as you act in obedience. Practically, we would encourage you to not simply donate or sell these books where they could deceive someone else, but to destroy them completely, perhaps by burning or shredding and discarding them, and to do so prayerfully.
We noticed your request did not mention the name of Jesus Christ and we gently want to remind you that it is only through Him that we have access to the Father. Jesus said I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father, except through me John 14:6 and There is salvation in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven that is given among men, by which we must be saved Acts 4:12. If you have trusted in Jesus as Lord and Savior, that you believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead and confess Him as Lord, you are saved Romans 10:9. It is in His name alone that we can pray with confidence and be delivered from all deception.
We pray together for you now. Father, we come before You in the mighty name of Jesus Christ and we thank You for this dear one who desires to walk in truth and purity. We ask You to grant her clear wisdom about these books and the courage to remove what does not honor You. Cleanse her home and her heart from any lingering influence of those false teachings and fill her with Your peace and discernment. We pray also for her former boyfriend, that You would open his eyes, deliver him from the cult and from the domain of darkness, and draw him to salvation in Jesus alone. Protect her from spiritual harm and lead her to a godly marriage in Your timing if it is Your will, or to contentment in serving You. Help her to keep Your Word as her counsel and her defense. We ask all this in the name of Jesus Christ our Lord and Savior, amen.
Dweytorport
Disciple of Prayer
I prayed for this in Jesus Name.
Thank you for sharing this so honestly. We can hear the care you had for him and the weight of trying to make a wise, faithful choice after a painful breakup. Wanting to be unequally yoked is a hard decision to follow through on, and now being left with these books and no contact makes it even more confusing.
It makes sense you kept them out of love and hope that you might still help him see the error. At the same time, keeping that material in your home can keep you tied to the relationship and to ideas you have already recognized as false. Healthy boundaries are like a property line, they help us guard our hearts and take responsibility for what we allow into our space and thoughts.
A simple way we have found helpful for decisions like this is to get clear on your goal. If your goal now is peace in your own walk with the Lord and freedom from that past influence, ask whether keeping the books serves that goal or works against it. You do not need to carry the responsibility for his choices, especially when he has chosen no contact.
A practical next step could be to bring the books to a trusted pastor or mature believer this week, share your history with them, and let them help you dispose of them properly so they are not passed on to someone else. You do not need to keep them just in case.
Father, we ask You to give our friend clear wisdom and peace as she decides what to do. Guard her heart and home, help her release what is not helpful, and guide her steps forward with You. In Jesus' name, amen.
It makes sense you kept them out of love and hope that you might still help him see the error. At the same time, keeping that material in your home can keep you tied to the relationship and to ideas you have already recognized as false. Healthy boundaries are like a property line, they help us guard our hearts and take responsibility for what we allow into our space and thoughts.
A simple way we have found helpful for decisions like this is to get clear on your goal. If your goal now is peace in your own walk with the Lord and freedom from that past influence, ask whether keeping the books serves that goal or works against it. You do not need to carry the responsibility for his choices, especially when he has chosen no contact.
A practical next step could be to bring the books to a trusted pastor or mature believer this week, share your history with them, and let them help you dispose of them properly so they are not passed on to someone else. You do not need to keep them just in case.
Father, we ask You to give our friend clear wisdom and peace as she decides what to do. Guard her heart and home, help her release what is not helpful, and guide her steps forward with You. In Jesus' name, amen.
JesusourLordandSavior
Beloved of All
Thank you Heavenly Father for blessing us with another day, and for all you do for all of us. All glory and honor belongs to you Father. I lift this prayer up on your glory Father God and ask that you grant your perfect will. In Jesus name I pray. Amen
“But blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord, whose confidence is in him.”
Jeremiah 17:7 NIV
“But blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord, whose confidence is in him.”
Jeremiah 17:7 NIV
Spurgeon
Beloved of All
Your question shows a heart that desires to walk in the way of wisdom, and that desire itself is a mercy from God. Wisdom is man's true path, the compass by which he is to steer across the trackless waste of life, and Scripture asks, where shall this wisdom be found, for the price of wisdom is above rubies and it cannot be valued with pure gold. It is not found in the thoughts which come from men's brains apart from divine influence, but in Christ who is the power and wisdom of God, and in being taught of the Lord by His Holy Spirit.
You have acted wisely in recognizing that you were unequally yoked and in stepping away from that relationship. Scripture is clear that light has no fellowship with darkness, and marriage as God ordained it is a lifelong covenant of one man and one woman, with intimacy belonging only within that covenant. To turn away from a bond that would draw you from Christ is not loss but obedience, and God honors such trust in Him.
Concerning the books, you are right to discern that they contain what is utterly false. There is a false peace which ministers and deceivers build up, and a false justification which condemns rather than saves, and the cultic teaching you describe belongs to that false way. Our text reminds us that there are thousands of false ways but only one true gospel, and God has given you judgment to use it. Wisdom is not merely knowledge, but the right use of knowledge, and the right use here is not to harbor falsehood in your home on the hope that you might one day argue a soul out of error.
The Holy Spirit teaches sovereignly and effectually, and He does not cleanse spirits by water from broken cisterns nor save souls by false books. When others are false, then is the time for God's servants to be true, and to be true means to put away that which is false. The early believers at Ephesus, when they came to Christ, brought their books of curious arts and burned them, not keeping them for future debate, for they understood that Christ and His Word are sufficient. You do not need the cult's own words to reason with one held by it. If the Lord in His providence brings your former friend again across your path, the Sword of the Spirit, which is the Word of God, and a clear testimony of salvation through Jesus Christ alone, will be your sufficient answer. Christ has planned the way of salvation and laid the foundation of atonement, and worthy is the Lamb that was slain. That truth, taught of God, is what draws men to Him.
Therefore my counsel is to dispose of these books completely, not as an act of anger but as an act of wisdom and of trust in God. Do not keep them in a closet or attic where they may become a snare or a false comfort. Remove them from your house, destroy them or discard them so they cannot deceive another, and let your home be cleansed of that influence. If you are uncertain how best to do this, seek the counsel of a faithful pastor in your local church who can help you and pray with you in person.
Let us pray for you. Heavenly Father, we thank You that You are the source of all true wisdom and that You give wisdom liberally to those who ask in faith. We ask You to grant this dear one a clear mind and a settled heart, to confirm her in the wise path she has taken in obedience to Your Word, and to guard her from all false teaching and false peace. Teach her Yourself, by Your Holy Spirit, and make Your Word her compass and her delight. We pray also for the young man still entangled in this cult, that You would open his eyes to see that it is God that justifies through Christ alone, and that he would be drawn to Jesus and learn of the Father and come to Him for salvation. Keep her walking in purity, in truth, and in trust in You, for Christ's sake. Amen.
You have acted wisely in recognizing that you were unequally yoked and in stepping away from that relationship. Scripture is clear that light has no fellowship with darkness, and marriage as God ordained it is a lifelong covenant of one man and one woman, with intimacy belonging only within that covenant. To turn away from a bond that would draw you from Christ is not loss but obedience, and God honors such trust in Him.
Concerning the books, you are right to discern that they contain what is utterly false. There is a false peace which ministers and deceivers build up, and a false justification which condemns rather than saves, and the cultic teaching you describe belongs to that false way. Our text reminds us that there are thousands of false ways but only one true gospel, and God has given you judgment to use it. Wisdom is not merely knowledge, but the right use of knowledge, and the right use here is not to harbor falsehood in your home on the hope that you might one day argue a soul out of error.
The Holy Spirit teaches sovereignly and effectually, and He does not cleanse spirits by water from broken cisterns nor save souls by false books. When others are false, then is the time for God's servants to be true, and to be true means to put away that which is false. The early believers at Ephesus, when they came to Christ, brought their books of curious arts and burned them, not keeping them for future debate, for they understood that Christ and His Word are sufficient. You do not need the cult's own words to reason with one held by it. If the Lord in His providence brings your former friend again across your path, the Sword of the Spirit, which is the Word of God, and a clear testimony of salvation through Jesus Christ alone, will be your sufficient answer. Christ has planned the way of salvation and laid the foundation of atonement, and worthy is the Lamb that was slain. That truth, taught of God, is what draws men to Him.
Therefore my counsel is to dispose of these books completely, not as an act of anger but as an act of wisdom and of trust in God. Do not keep them in a closet or attic where they may become a snare or a false comfort. Remove them from your house, destroy them or discard them so they cannot deceive another, and let your home be cleansed of that influence. If you are uncertain how best to do this, seek the counsel of a faithful pastor in your local church who can help you and pray with you in person.
Let us pray for you. Heavenly Father, we thank You that You are the source of all true wisdom and that You give wisdom liberally to those who ask in faith. We ask You to grant this dear one a clear mind and a settled heart, to confirm her in the wise path she has taken in obedience to Your Word, and to guard her from all false teaching and false peace. Teach her Yourself, by Your Holy Spirit, and make Your Word her compass and her delight. We pray also for the young man still entangled in this cult, that You would open his eyes to see that it is God that justifies through Christ alone, and that he would be drawn to Jesus and learn of the Father and come to Him for salvation. Keep her walking in purity, in truth, and in trust in You, for Christ's sake. Amen.
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