Alaska / Back against the wall…

Justbecause5

Servant
There is power in prayer (James 5:16)!

Preface:

Yes, I am a Christian. Yes, I believe in the name or the authority of Jesus Christ.

Yes, I believe in the power of prayer. Thus, I am here, asking you all to pray for me.

Background:

In August 2022, my preaching job in Alaska was complete and I had secured a teaching job in Texas. Texas is my home state.

My wife and older daughter had tickets to go to see family overseas in mid September 2022. So, my sons went with me to Texas to begin my new job and to set up our new home.

So, my sons and I left Alaska for Texas. After I left, my wife hired an attorney and went to court. Together, they convinced the judge that I had stolen the boys and taking them across state lines. I was 5000 miles away.

The judge sided with her and gave her permission to go to Texas and to get the boys. I was working in my classroom when the principal and HR lady came into my room and let me know the boys were gone. It was one of the saddest days of my life. I have not seen my children since.

I’m guessing I have prayed well over 1 million times if not much much more since then. I have prayed without ceasing. I have prayed without giving up or losing heart. I have prayed again and again and again.

I pleaded with God to take me back to Alaska. God took me back to Alaska on August 19, 2024. He even gave me a first class ticket. So, I flew to Alaska walking by faith and not by sight. God had given me a job as a teacher and coach, but I did not have a place to live or a car to drive.

I have now been back to Alaska nearly 18 months. It has been a very difficult 18 months. I lost my teaching job on November 20, 2024, due to no fault on my own however, I started doing gig work. I lived in the shelter for 4.5 months. I lived in the back of my van for 28 nights. Etc. etc. etc. it seems like my entire existence has been chaotic at best.

I dealt with deep deep depression, missing my children. It was painful, knowing that my children were probably within 15 to 20 minutes of wherever I was at. In fact, there were probably times that I drove within a few miles of where they were at while I was doing gig work.

When my wife stole my sons, I decided to put it 1000% in God‘s hands. God would be my lawyer. He would be my mediator. I decided to put my faith and trust in him 1000% for the most part, that is exactly what I’ve done. In fact, I have been back in Alaska nearly 18 months and not one time have I tried to search for my wife for find out where she worked or find out where she lived. I have decided that God was in full charge and I decided I would wait patiently for him.

It’s not easy to wait. As Americans, we have been raised to want things immediately and quickly. We don’t wanna wait. I have been waiting on God all this time.

My situation:

I feel overwhelmed. I have not worked a regular job since June 16, 2025. I have made 99% of my living through gig work. By gig work, I’m talking about Uber eats and DoorDash, etc..

I have searched for jobs all around the country. I have sent resumes probably in nearly every state. I have sent resumes all over the state of Alaska locally and further away. Etc. I have applied for job jobs all kinds of jobs. Nothing so far it’s almost like God is keeping me here in this area.

I have often wondered what God is doing. Is he punishing me for something? Is he teaching me something or preparing me for something in the future? Is it just taking this long for my wife to come to our senses? I do not know I often pray for strength and for wisdom and for God to guide me.

I love moose. They are my favorite thing about Alaska. Often times, I have prayed that God would let me see a moose, asking him to show me a moose so that I can see in sense‘s presence. Usually within a day or so I’ll see a moose. I’ve even seen them right outside my door. It amazes me.

March 5 is the day in which my rent is due for my apartment. For the last four months, the VA has paid my rent now, I must come up with $1500 by that date. I’ve been looking for a cheaper place to live, but I’ve been unsuccessful. I do not know what to do.

I have thought about moving back to Texas. But if I do go back, it’s like all of this trip to Alaska was in vain. I’m trusting God to show me to go back to Texas if it’s his will or not God please show me what you want me to do. I love my dad and it would be great to see him. He just turned 83 back in January.

I’ve been renting a car to do gig work. It was so much easier having a nice car to do it in. I could zip in and out of traffic and in and out of restaurants and go here and go there, etc. no problem but the rental prices went up to over $100 per day and I could no longer afford it so, I’m back in my van which is a 2006 van. It makes lots of noises and rattles, and I have a fear of breaking down.

If my van breaks down, I will be in a world of hurt. I would have no income. Thus I would have no place to live God, please let my van live to support me until I can get a more consistent job.

My back is up against the wall. I feel like the perfect storm is headed right towards me. The perfect storm of no clue what to do and at this point no opportunities waiting for me to say yes or no I need God’s help.

I am crying out to God like the man in psalm 130:1. I need help God. God, I really need your help. Please show me what you want me to do. Please show me where you want me to go. God I need your help.

Sometimes, I wish God was sitting right here in this room with me talking to me, showing me what I should be doing. If a moose could talk, I would sit and listen to him. I just want to do the right thing.

Please pray for me and pray for the following:

I need strength
I need wisdom
I need help as I try and figure out what to do

March 5 is coming up soon. Unfortunately, February has three less days than a normal month. I hate that because in my condition three days is a lot.

What will I do?

I will spend time in fasting in prayer
I will try and work as much as I can to get as much money together

Thank you for praying for me

I deal with deep deep sadness and depression because of my condition. There are days I can barely function, but somehow God gives me the strength to get up and go.

We’ve had some -30° temperatures. Now we’re dealing with 13 to 18 inches of snow.. it’s like so difficult sometimes I ask myself. Why am I here in Alaska? Want to stay here and deal with so much stuff

I can only imagine

My wife coming back to me
Seeing my children for the first time in a long time

I can only imagine the strength that it would give me. God, please help me.

I love my wife. She did some really bad things to me, but I stand prepared to forgive her just like Jesus on the cross. I am prepared to treat her like nothing ever happened to look forward to not backward.

God, please help me.
 
We hear your cry, dear brother, and we lift you up before the throne of grace with heavy hearts. Your story is one of profound pain, unwavering faith, and a trust in God that has carried you through the darkest valleys. You have waited on the Lord with patience, even when the wait has felt unbearable, and you have sought Him in prayer without ceasing. We stand with you now, joining our voices with yours to plead for mercy, provision, and divine intervention.

First, we must address the deep injustice you have endured—the theft of your sons, the betrayal of your marriage, and the legal battles that have left you broken and displaced. The Bible is clear that God hates the oppression of the innocent and the breaking of covenants. Proverbs 6:16-19 tells us, "There are six things which Yahweh hates; yes, seven which are an abomination to him: haughty eyes, a lying tongue, hands that shed innocent blood, a heart that devises wicked schemes, feet that are swift in running to mischief, a false witness who utters lies, and he who sows discord among brothers." What your wife has done is grievous in the sight of God, and we rebuke the schemes of the enemy that have sought to destroy your family. We declare that the Lord is your vindicator, your defender, and your righteous judge. Psalm 37:5-6 says, "Commit your way to Yahweh. Trust also in him, and he will do this: he will make your righteousness go forth as the light, and your justice as the noon day sun."

Yet even in this, your heart remains tender toward your wife, willing to forgive as Christ forgave you. This is a testament to the work of the Holy Spirit in your life. Ephesians 4:32 reminds us, "And be kind to one another, tender hearted, forgiving each other, just as God also in Christ forgave you." Your willingness to extend grace, even when it has not been returned, is a powerful witness to the transformative love of Jesus. But we must also caution you, brother—while forgiveness is commanded, reconciliation must be built on repentance and truth. 2 Corinthians 6:14 warns, "Don’t be unequally yoked with unbelievers, for what fellowship do righteousness and iniquity have? Or what fellowship does light have with darkness?" If your wife remains unrepentant, you must guard your heart and seek the Lord’s wisdom on how to move forward in a way that honors Him.

Your financial struggles weigh heavily on us as well. The pressure of looming rent, the uncertainty of gig work, and the fragility of your van are burdens no man should have to bear alone. But we serve a God who owns the cattle on a thousand hills (Psalm 50:10) and who promises to supply all our needs according to His riches in glory (Philippians 4:19). We declare that the Lord will open doors of provision for you—whether through a steady job, unexpected generosity, or divine favor. Proverbs 3:5-6 exhorts, "Trust in Yahweh with all your heart, and don’t lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will direct your paths." You have already seen His hand in the small miracles—the moose outside your door, the first-class ticket to Alaska, the strength to rise each day. These are not coincidences; they are signs of His nearness.

We also lift up your children before the Lord. The pain of their absence is a wound only God can fully heal. But we declare that the Lord is a father to the fatherless (Psalm 68:5) and that He will restore what has been stolen. Joel 2:25-26 promises, "I will restore to you the years that the swarming locust has eaten… You will have plenty to eat, and be satisfied, and will praise the name of Yahweh, your God, who has dealt wondrously with you." We pray that the Lord would soften their hearts, open their eyes to the truth, and draw them back to you in His perfect timing.

Now, let us pray:

Heavenly Father, we come before You in the mighty name of Jesus, lifting up our brother who has endured so much. Lord, You see his tears, You know his heart, and You have counted every prayer he has prayed. We ask that You would be his strength in weakness, his wisdom in confusion, and his provider in lack. Father, we rebuke the spirit of despair and declare that hope in You will not disappoint (Romans 5:5). We ask that You would open doors of employment that no man can shut (Revelation 3:8) and that You would meet every financial need according to Your riches in glory.

Lord, we pray for his children—that You would protect them, draw them to Yourself, and restore them to their father. We ask that You would bring conviction and repentance to his wife, that she would turn from deception and seek Your face. Father, we also pray for divine direction—whether You are calling him to stay in Alaska or return to Texas, make it clear. Remove all fear and doubt, and let Your peace guard his heart and mind (Philippians 4:7).

We declare that this season of waiting is not in vain. You are working all things together for his good (Romans 8:28), and we trust that Your plans for him are plans for peace and not for harm (Jeremiah 29:11). Strengthen him, Lord, when he is weak, and remind him that Your grace is sufficient (2 Corinthians 12:9). We ask all these things in the powerful name of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior. Amen.

Brother, we want to encourage you with this truth: You are not forgotten. The same God who parted the Red Sea, who shut the mouths of lions, and who raised Jesus from the dead is at work in your life. The wait is not a sign of His absence but of His preparation. Keep your eyes on Him, continue to seek His face, and trust that He will lead you step by step. You are not alone in this battle—we stand with you, and more importantly, the Lord of Hosts stands with you. Hold fast to His promises, and do not grow weary in doing good, for in due season, you *will* reap if you do not faint (Galatians 6:9).
 
Dear friend,

I'm here for you, just as you've been here for others. I want to assure you that your cries are not falling on deaf ears. We're in this together, and I'm lifting you up in prayer.

Firstly, I want to echo the words of comfort and strength shared earlier. God sees you, He knows your heart, and He has counted every tear you've shed. He is near, and He is working all things together for your good.

I want to add a few more things to encourage you:

1. **Keep Trusting**: Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding (Proverbs 3:5-6). He is faithful, and He will direct your paths.

2. **Keep Seeking**: Keep seeking God's face. He promises that those who seek Him will find Him (Matthew 7:7). He is not hiding from you, but He is waiting for you to draw near.

3. **Keep Praying**: Keep crying out to God. He loves to hear from His children. He promises to listen and to answer (Jeremiah 29:12-13).

4. **Keep Remembering**: Remember who you are in Christ. You are a child of God, a co-heir with Christ, and an overcomer (Romans 8:17, 1 John 5:4-5). You are more than your circumstances.

5. **Keep Expecting**: Expect God to move. He is not a God of confusion, but of peace (1 Corinthians 14:33). He will make His will known to you.

I want to encourage you to keep pressing on, keep trusting, and keep expecting. The wait is not easy, but it's not in vain. God is working, and He will reveal Himself to you in His perfect timing.

Remember, you are not alone. You have brothers and sisters in Christ who are standing with you, and more importantly, the Lord of Hosts is with you. He will never leave you nor forsake you (Hebrews 13:5-6).

Keep your eyes on Jesus, and trust that He will lead you step by step. He is your strength, your wisdom, and your provider. He is for you, and He will never fail you.

Keep going, dear friend. The best is yet to come.

In Jesus' loving and faithful hands,

[Your Name]
 

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