We hear your heart’s cry for love, security, and a fresh start. You long for a godly marriage—a relationship rooted in Christ, where you feel cherished, understood, and at peace. We stand with you in prayer, lifting your desires before the Lord, but we must also speak truth in love, for His Word is our foundation.
First, we must address the way you’ve framed your request. You’ve spoken words of demand—"I speak," "I get"—as if love and a spouse could be conjured by human will. But Scripture teaches us that every good gift comes from the Father (James 1:17), and we are called to seek *His* will, not our own desires apart from Him. Jesus said, *"Seek first God’s Kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well"* (Matthew 6:33). Your focus must shift from what you *want* to what God *wills* for you.
You also mention desiring a boyfriend—a term that, biblically, should reflect a season of *courtship* with the *intent* of marriage to a fellow believer. The world’s view of dating for pleasure or temporary companionship is not God’s design. Marriage is a sacred covenant between one man and one woman, established by God for His glory (Genesis 2:24, Ephesians 5:31). If you are seeking a spouse, you must do so with purity, patience, and a heart surrendered to Christ. Any relationship outside of marriage—whether emotional or physical—is not God’s best for you. The Bible is clear: *"Flee sexual immorality. Every sin that a man does is outside the body, but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body"* (1 Corinthians 6:18). If you have walked in ways that dishonor God, repentance and turning away from sin is the first step toward restoration.
You’ve also expressed frustration with past hurts, even naming specific individuals and circumstances that have wounded you. While we grieve with you over the pain you’ve endured, we must rebuke the bitterness and unforgiveness in your words. Scripture commands us: *"Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, outcry, and slander be put away from you, with all malice. And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving each other, just as God also in Christ forgave you"* (Ephesians 4:31-32). Holding onto anger gives the enemy a foothold in your life (Ephesians 4:26-27). We pray for your healing, but true freedom comes when you release those who have wronged you into God’s hands.
You’ve also mentioned wanting a man who "loves God" and has "something in his background" that allows him to accept you. While it’s wise to seek a spouse who shares your faith, we must caution you against placing conditions on God’s provision. A godly man is one who fears the Lord, walks in humility, and seeks to honor Him in all things (Proverbs 31:30, 1 Peter 3:7). He may not be perfect—none of us are—but he should be a man of prayer, Scripture, and integrity. Do not settle for less than God’s best because of loneliness or impatience. *"Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart"* (Psalm 37:4). This does not mean God will give you *any* desire, but that He will shape your desires to align with *His* will.
Now, we turn to the Lord in prayer for you:
Heavenly Father, we come before You on behalf of this dear sister, lifting her heart to You. Lord, she is weary and longs for love, security, and a godly marriage. We ask that You would first draw her close to You, that she would find her identity, worth, and fulfillment in Christ alone. Heal the wounds of her past, Father, and replace bitterness with Your peace. Teach her to forgive as You have forgiven her, and to walk in the freedom of Your grace.
Lord, we ask that You would purify her heart and align her desires with Yours. If she has walked in ways that dishonor You, convict her gently and lead her to repentance. Guard her heart from impatience, from settling for less than Your best, and from relationships that would lead her away from You. Surround her with godly community—women who will pray for her, encourage her, and hold her accountable.
Father, we pray for the man You have prepared for her, if it is Your will. Raise up a husband who loves You above all else, who will cherish her, lead her with gentleness, and honor her as Your daughter. Prepare *both* of their hearts for marriage, that it would be a union that glorifies You. Until that day, give her contentment in You, joy in Your presence, and trust in Your perfect timing.
We rebuke every spirit of loneliness, insecurity, and past hurt in Jesus’ name. We declare that she is fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14), redeemed by the blood of Christ, and deeply loved by You. Let her walk in the confidence of Your love, knowing that You are her Provider, her Protector, and her Peace.
Lord, we also ask for restoration in areas where she feels broken—her voice, her energy, her joy. You are the God who restores what was lost (Joel 2:25), and we trust You to renew her strength and fill her with hope.
Above all, we pray that she would seek You first, trusting that You know the plans You have for her—plans for hope and a future (Jeremiah 29:11). May she find her satisfaction in You alone, and may every other desire flow from that place of intimacy with You.
We pray all these things in the mighty, matchless name of Jesus Christ, the only name by which we are saved and through whom we have access to You. Amen.
Sister, we encourage you to spend time in God’s Word, allowing it to renew your mind and shape your desires. Consider studying passages on marriage (Ephesians 5:22-33), godly love (1 Corinthians 13), and contentment (Philippians 4:11-13). Surround yourself with believers who will pray for you and speak truth into your life. And remember: your worth is not found in a relationship, but in Christ. You are *His* beloved, and He will never leave you nor forsake you (Hebrews 13:5). Trust Him with your heart, and He will lead you in paths of righteousness for His name’s sake.